your forever is all that i need [knox <3]

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED For once, Issy's father was home. Not doing anything either, not shutting himself away in his office, not ignoring him. As a matter of fact, when he saw his son come downstairs with a bag in his hand and bowtie loose around his neck, he beckoned the boy forth to knot it. Israel winced a little as it was too tight, but his father looked very stern. Focused. He stepped back when he was finished, looking up and down at his suit. "I'd prefer you wear a tie." He didn't let the disappointment show when he evenly replied, "But I prefer it." With a wink he sauntered off to bid his mother goodbye. She showed more approval over his relationship than his father, and that was sad because she had said nothing about it. His father, however, told him it was just a phase. Rolled his eyes, thought that it was temporary like when he became addicted to grilled cheese sandwiches for a short period of time, or when he had gone gotten all his tattoos. Issy felt disdainful. As always, parents didn't understand. Especially not the ones that didn't pay much attention anyway. He wouldn't let these thoughts ruin his night, however. He would be celebrating both Knox's birthday and Valentine's Day. He loved that his boyfriend had his birthday on his favorite holiday -- it was perfect. He also loved that he could call Knox his boyfriend. The word reminded him that the boy was finally his, all his, and that all of his nervousness in the months after he reunited with him again was worth it. Now, they were actually together, and he couldn't be happier. Even though he understood it was Knox's first relationship, he could hardly care. He made Israel happy, and that was all that mattered. Besides, he didn't think the Earth graduate could ever screw up. Issy felt he was the one who needed worrying about, despite all his experience, prior relationships that paled in comparison to how he felt about his new boyfriend. Well, not completely new, they'd been dating for months now. They would be celebrating their four month anniversary soon enough, and yes Israel was sentimental and mushy like that. It was why he'd gotten the present that he did. Technically two gifts, given the situation. Though he had a lot of money, he was going for sentimental. Nice gestures. Besides, this wasn't like his girlfriends before, he wouldn't be buying expensive jewelry or shoes. And well, he wanted to make sure that Knox knew how much he cared about him. As he drove, the butterflies flitted around his stomach, a testament to how much he was looking forward to this. How Knox made him feel. He was giddy as a small child doing something bad, something he shouldn't be doing. That same kind of excitement practically making him bounce in his seat. Knox would be turning nineteen, and that was a part of it. He was finally legal to drink. And today was just his absolute favorite holiday, though that was not surprising whatsoever. Grabbing the bag from the passenger seat, he headed into the restaurant and told the maître d', "Reservations for Valentine?" He almost laughed at that, his last name. He bet the woman looking down the list thought it was some kind of joke, not his name, and he was grinning ear to ear as if he were verifying this. She nodded, told him that the other person wasn't here yet in his reservation for two, so he shook his head and said that was fine. A server led him to the table and handed him a menu. The place was expensive, but he had the money. And while Knox did to, he was determined to pay for it. This was Knox's birthday and that was all the reason he needed as he scanned the list. The didn't even have a dollar sign in front of some of the dishes, just the numbers. The Wind student was careful not to let his foot kick the bag under the table. He didn't want to let Knox see it right away, he wanted to wait until the perfect time. He just couldn't wait to see him and how he would look. Surely he'd dress up, just like Israel had, but he had long ago decided that Knox would look drop-dead gorgeous in anything he put on. Issy actually had to put effort into it, had to groom himself and make sure everything was organized. He wondered how Knox did it. All his thoughts were swimming with the boy, and he knew that he was way too in love. Should he say that? Should he tell Knox what he felt tonight, on the most romantic day? His stomach twisted, unsure if this was too soon. When did he first tell the others I love you? It hardly seemed to matter. They didn't mean as much to him as Knox did now. He still appreciated those relationships, but this was different. Would saying those words just scare his boyfriend off? I'll have to see. He would not get through this night without telling Knox what he felt, not on Valentine's Day.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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Knox wasn’t sure whether he liked his birthday or outright dreaded it. Admittedly, it wasn’t full of parties unless his mom had a bit too much to drink a few weeks earlier and decided Valentine’s Day would make a wonderful day to get a group of lawyers together to raise money for one charity or another. The morning, however, had passed peacefully enough. His mother had given him a kiss on the forehead and a wish, a few new books and an envelope with two hundred dollars that she’d said was from his father. Raine had called to wish him a “happy birthday” and luck on his date. When he’d told his mother he was going out that evening, she’d only asked where, and then helped him choose a suit and tie to suit the expectations of Northern Lights. Apparently, his father had promised her something special elsewhere. Maybe they were flying to New York for the evening. Either way, they were all out of each others’ hair. Nonetheless, the nerves caught up with him, and he decided walking there would help him calm down at least a little bit. God, he hoped it would work. He wouldn’t know until eh got there—but he left early enough to make sure he would at least arrive on time.

He glanced down at his hands just as he reached the restaurant. His stomach plummeted. Were flowers okay? Should he have tossed them out? Should he really give them to Issy? He liked the story well enough, the one he’d heard and written on the little card among the flowers, but… but was it still okay to give him flowers? If Israel were a girl (abandoning, for a moment, the fact that he wasn’t interested in dating girls), he wouldn’t be wondering. But Issy wasn’t. Because Issy wasn’t, he was wondering this, but on so many more levels. Because Israel wasn’t a girl, Knox was actually attracted to him. Because Israel wasn’t actually a girl, he was going out with the wind, even if barely anyone knew that. Israel wasn’t a girl, and Knox really liked that about him. While his stomach tugged along on the floor, his heart lifted. He was going on a Valentine’s Day date with his boyfriend. He couldn’t stop the goofy grin that emerged. He really hoped that Israel would like the flowers. He hoped even more that the wind would appreciate the story that went with them: A man once gave the girl he loved a bouquet of flowers, and told her that his love would die the day that all the flowers did. But among the flowers was a fake one, which would never die, and so his love would never die. He pushed open the door to the restaurant, not looking around in amazement as he had the first time he’d visited.

The woman behind the podium showed him to the table even before he finished stuttering through the entire bit, probably taking pity on him. As soon as he saw his boyfriend—he still couldn’t quite believe the word, after four whole months—he broke into another grin. His hands tightened around the bouquet of flowers that he held in front of his chest and he sat down next to Israel rather than across from him. He didn’t notice until he was seated that another figure was standing opposite him, offering Israel a wine bottle that he didn’t bother to read. Any greeting died in his throat as he blushed and looked away again, staring at the orange lilies in his hands and the pristine white card nestled amongst them. He was old enough to drink officially, as of today. He hadn’t really had an immense desire to do so as the day passed, though his father had offered him a glass before he left, to ease nerves which had apparently been very obvious. Neither of his parents knew what he was doing, only that he was going out to dinner with a friend. They trusted him, though. Raine would cover for him if they asked her.

Again, he felt guilty for not wanting to tell anyone about the male sitting sort-of beside him. He liked Israel—a lot—but he couldn’t quite put words to express that to anyone else. He also almost liked the privacy of their relationship. He didn’t think he needed to share it with anyone. Why was it anyone else’s business? It wasn’t. They were happy together. Right? God, he hoped so. He glanced over nervously, biting his lip, and down again, at the flowers. Oh. Flowers. He should probably give them. Blushing furiously at having forgotten to do so, he held out the flowers to Israel, but managed a smile and, noticing the man with the wine was gone, said, “I-I hope you-you l-like the-these.” They weren’t the typical roses for a very good reason—Knox couldn’t stand the flowers. They made him sneeze to no ends. He felt like his brain would pop out his nostrils sometimes, when he was around roses. They made his eyes water, too, though that might have been more of a result of the violent sneezing than the actual roses. He wasn’t even sure why only roses had the effect on him, but there wasn’t really anything he could do about it. Did Israel know? He didn’t know, but he didn’t think it would be much of a problem. “Happy… Happy Valentine’s D-Day.” He was trying to control his stutter. Trying so hard.

notes, this is lali, fucking chronological order ;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 9 2 8 ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! northern lights ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED Rather than nerves, Israel felt anticipation. Excitement. How would Knox look? What was he wearing? It felt silly, these thoughts swirling around in his head. This wasn't their first date. But it was special to him. Any day spent with Knox was special to him, and he acknowledged that it may have been absurdly sentimental to think that way. People probably looked down their nose at him, how he adored his boyfriend, head over heels like a schoolgirl with a crush. He didn't gush, the only person he would even feel comfortable doing that around was Raine or Rowena, but he still had all those thoughts and feelings. And the attraction. He felt that a lot, but he didn't act on it in the way he wanted. He had a proper reign on himself. He could do it. He wanted to set a nice, steady pace for his boyfriend. If he were a dog, his eyes would have perked up when he spied Knox. As it were, his eyes brightened as his lips stretched into a smile. He looked so handsome, the kind of handsome that made his stomach hurt because it must have been inhuman to look that good. Issy didn't even think he looked as good, he couldn't work a tie like Knox did. It had to be a sin for someone so innocent and adorable to look that sexy. Bad thoughts ran a muck in his head, and he didn't know if he wanted to reign them in. It was Valentine's Day, the day of love. Love. The word brought his dilemma back to mind, for a moment spoiling the sight of his boyfriend with nerves and terror. But he felt that good nervousness when Knox sat next to him with the flowers. The Wind boy took them, eyes still bright, just like a child's. Orange...what were they? He gasped lightly, not the kind of sound when someone got a frightening shock, but the sentimental one when receiving something nice. "They're..." He tried to think of the right word, wrinkled his nose in thought. What could he call it that would describe it perfectly? "Exquisite." Yes, very good, exquisite. You sound like an old woman. He discarded the thought, exasperated with himself, before saying, "Thanks, baby." He kissed Knox on the lips, just a quick peck. He wanted to do more, always do more. "Did you grow these yourself?" He asked, touching the petals lightly with his fingertips. The Wind boy had yet to find the card, completely oblivious as usual. He smiled and teased, "And a happy birthday to you." He brushed his nose against Knox's in an eskimo kiss, holding the flowers in his lap. "Nineteen, full-grown adult!" He looked at the wine that the waiter had given them, and then back to Knox. "You know what that means." He could drink any alcohol, all the alcohol, and it wouldn't be illegal. Israel already drank, but that hardly mattered. In that moment, he remembered the bag under the table. He blinked, said, "Oh, right!" and bent down to collect it, almost hitting his head on the underside of the table when straightening himself. "Lucky you, getting a dual present." He held out the bag, a simple blue one to keep it ambiguous. Inside held a coupon book, one of those handmade ones that contained free kisses, free massages, one free win in a fight, so on...the Valentine's Day present. His birthday present was much different, not as cute but still thoughtful. As he had a lot of money, he wanted to give something big -- not in size, but in wealth. He'd decided on Dr. Dre Beats headphones, because of how much Knox liked music. They weren't as expensive as other gift options, but it felt the most meaningful to Israel.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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Israel liked the flowers and Knox felt like his stomach was finally back where it was supposed to be. He grinned back at him, amused by his word choice. He liked the word for the flowers, though he doubted he would have used it himself. He glanced at them, tracing the shapes with his eyes, and thus not expecting the kiss. He flushed crimson. He wasn’t used to the public displays of affection, even if they’d been dating for months. He liked the kisses, though, which was probably the main reason he hadn’t asked Israel to stop—aside from the fear that it would somehow be insulting to him. Similarly, he liked the nickname. Baby. Even if he wasn’t one, he sensed the affection in it, and he wished he were confident enough to use a similar pet name to be more clear about his own.

He cleared his throat nervously, blushing again. “I did,” he admitted. He didn’t know as much about flowers as he supposed he ought to, being an Earth elemental and all, but he’d doubted that lilies like this grew in February on their own. He could have bought them somewhere, probably. There were stores that were designed specifically to serve those with odd interests, like buying flowers out of season, but he’d felt this would be easier, and more personal anyway. And Israel like them. He wouldn’t go so far as to pat himself on the back, but it made him immensely happy. “I… I’m glad… th-that y-you… like th-them,” he added, smiling at him, and leaned forward to kiss his cheek. It was awkward to him only because it was an unaccustomed movement. He didn’t mind the fuzz on Israel’s cheeks. He thought the texture was interesting. Besides, he couldn’t imagine the wind clean-shaved, and he liked him the way he was.

“Th-thanks,” he mumbled, looking down. He’d never celebrated Valentine’s Day with anyone before. It had always just been his birthday, though Raine tended to be busy on the makeshift holiday, and thus celebrated with him a day early or late. She never forgot to call, though, and he appreciated that. Not as much as he appreciated the reminder that he was legal to drink now. He glanced at the bottle as Israel did, his stomach churning again nervously. He had never had alcohol before, using the excuse that it was illegal for him to drink it. Now, he had no such excuse—and he was terrified. “I… I do,” he replied anyway, not wanting to lie, but knowing he ought to acknowledge what Israel had said all the same, even if it made him so incredibly anxious. He wasn’t supposed to be, though. He was supposed to be happy. He was on a Valentine’s Day date with his boyfriend. He was supposed to be happy.

Especially now that the flowers had gone over well.

The Earth blinked in confusion when Israel exclaimed and bent under the table. “C-Careful. Don’t hit your head.” He reached out, placing a hand on the back of the wind’s head to cushion him, worried. This, apparently, was unnecessary, however, as the wind emerged once again with a gift. The scarlet returned to his cheeks as he stared at the present, accepting it absently. He hadn’t expected one. “You… you did-didn’t have t-to…” He felt a it bad. He didn’t want Israel to feel obligated to celebrate both of the things on the same day, though he supposed that would mean fewer dates to remember. It was still sweet of him, and he supposed that ought to outweigh the guilt. He smiled at Israel and kisses his cheek again. “Th-thank you. May.. May I open it n-now? Or-or d-do you wa-want me to wa-wait?” He could. He’d be fine with waiting until they got… well, wherever they were going after dinner. He wasn’t entirely sure if Israel had plans or not. If he did, Knox hadn’t been informed, but he could ask. So he did, “Did.. Did you have pla-plans… other th-than dinner?”

notes, I can do short posts, too >> they feel odd, but I can do them xD;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 6 9 1 dirty ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! northern lights ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED Israel often wondered if Knox understood how wonderful he was, or if he didn't know that he was just a great person. In his world, because Israel was confident in himself, he believed that everyone else must have been too. He wasn't exactly the most empathetic of people, understanding of others. But he wanted to believe that all was well with his boyfriend. He wanted the best for Knox, after all. It was bad enough having his own family struggle. And he supposed in that way, Knox was an escape from that. He smiled at the flowers he held, like they had told him a joke and he'd laughed for a while before taking a long moment to appreciate it. So he did make them himself? "Not only handsome but skilled. Blessed by the gods." He pinched Knox's cheek lightly, not in the way one's Aunt Moira might, but in an affectionate way. This was a wonderful present, and he hoped they would last long enough so he could put them in a vase later. Since they were made by an Earth elemental, he wasn't too worried about it. "Of course I do!" He felt like he was on cloud nine at that moment, in the fancy restaurant with the man he loved. He couldn't stop his thoughts from going there because he really honestly did love Knox. Oblivious to how Knox really felt about alcohol -- he was used to teenagers who drank and partied every weekend -- Israel grinned. "That can wait." Wine may not have been his favorite liquor, but he had been drinking it long enough that he was actually used to it. Far too many dinners with people who didn't know, people his parents worked with, and one could become accustomed to anything at all. Israel chuckled at his boyfriend's concerned words, still with that endearing stutter. Sometimes he wondered if he did that because he still wasn't comfortable around him, but he tried not to think like that. "I'm good...good." He patted at his hair, making sure it was all still in place. It would be a rather bad time to be messing up his do. He wanted to look his best for his boyfriend, all the time, at all times. He smiled when his boyfriend kissed his cheek once more, enjoying the feeling of his lips against his skin. "Of course I did!" the Wind elemental said exuberantly. "It's a holiday and you're birthday. Plus, it's fun doting on you." He was that kind of person that loved to spoil his significant other. It was another way to show his affection, though he was very good at it otherwise. Issy nodded his head eagerly, giving him permission to open the present now. "We can go to my place after," he said, trying not to let any suggestiveness creep into his voice. He was very successful. "But I want you to open it now, I just can't wait any longer!" Realizing that his voice had escalated beyond what was most likely the appropriate volume, he hunched his shoulders, canting his head. Oops. He couldn't help that he was so happy on days like these. He was always the happiest when he was with Knox.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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Knox was honestly relieved when Israel pushed the wine out of the immediate future. He didn’t comment, only smiling at him, knowing his stutter would be worse if he did bother to speak and not planning to submit himself to such a terrible attempt. Why force himself? The discomfort would make it worse than usual. He was amazed he hadn’t stuttered so badly before when Israel had at first alluded to it. He licked his lips briefly, and turned his attention away from the worrisome red liquid (or was it white wine? He wasn’t versed enough in such things to tell the difference without seeing the contents) and back to the male at his side.

He didn’t think that Israel really needed to dote on him, though he appreciated the affection and would never forbid it. It just wasn’t necessary. He figured anything Israel could buy, his parents could get him just as well if he asked, though the wonderful thing was to see what Israel would get him, not just what he could get him. After all, a gift could easily prove just how well the giver knew the receiver. Some gifts were inherently neutral—bath salts or cologne, for example. Others were incredibly personal, like picture or a mix tape with “your song” on it. He’d never understood why people claimed songs to be theirs. But then there were also the gifts that seemed like they were neutral, but betrayed an understanding of the receiver otherwise. Glancing at the simple blue bag, he had to wonder what Israel had put together for him.

It was probably the second.

Although his parents had apparently planned to be out for the majority of the evening, he preferred the idea of returning to his boyfriend’s home after their dinner to going to his own. It was still sort of weird, thinking of Israel as his boyfriend, but it was an incredible weird that made him feel warm and happy. Regardless, he couldn’t muster the courage to tell his parents. It was by no means embarrassment regarding the male beside him. He couldn’t be embarrassed, even if he knew that Israel wasn’t what his parents had always wanted for him. He happened to be missing a few key parts of anatomy, and had a few things in addition that he knew his parents wouldn’t approve of—and doubted that Israel’s own would. The main issue there were the tattoos, he supposed, though he liked them personally. He’d caught himself staring more than once, fascinated by the colors and shapes, the way they weaved together. He just hoped that Israel hadn’t noticed.

The earth thought it was pretty cute the way Israel seemed so excited. He didn’t mind the volume that the excitement caused, either, but he was amazed at himself for applying the word “cute” to the wind. On the one hand, he couldn’t think of a more suitable term, but on the other, something told him that “cute” really wasn’t the best word either. He knew the word Raine would substitute for him, claiming it was honestly his opinion, but he couldn’t attest to the accuracy of it. Thankfully, she wasn’t here, and he could open the present on his own, without her interference, and hope that his facial expressions would be satisfying.

Indeed, the coupon book made him smile, partially in amusement, but mostly because he felt it suited Israel perfectly. He placed the book carefully in front of his plate, only so that it wouldn’t fall off the table while he found whatever the second present was. A second present was indeed too much, though he appreciated the thoughtfulness. If he could decided, he supposed the book was the one for Valentine’s Day. And, he knew as he pulled free the headphones and amazement splashed across his expression, that was the birthday present. He turned them over, reading the back of the packaging, and around again to study the design. “I… I’ve heard of th-these,” he commented, still studying them. His voice was soft, as usual, a little breathy with happy surprise. “They’re… they’re supposed to be fan-fantastic.”

He leaned across the table and kissed Israel. “Thank you.” He meant it with his whole heart.

notes, Issy posts give Lali muse -nods seriously- ;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 7 0 8 ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! northern lights ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED Watching Knox was like watching the ball drop on new year's, the same excitement and anticipation, but without the fireworks. The only fireworks were in his head, going off her and there with his sporadic thoughts. If someone saw him like this, the first time meeting him, they might not realize that he wasn't someone usually easily excited. He was reserved and quiet and kept to himself, usually not getting excited about little things. The boy kept it to himself, and it helped with his leader position. He kept it together. However, it was different with Knox. He always felt like being excited or energetic and generally just happy. And he pulled his lips between his teeth when Knox opened his second present, the headphones, which he had to do some research about. He wasn't that big into the music scene, but he liked to hang around artsy people and they kept him well-informed. And informed as he was, he figured that he chose well. "Yeah, yeah, they're like, really intense apparently." He nodded his head fervently. "I mean, I wouldn't know, or anything, but I made sure to do some asking around." He didn't want to end up wrong based on assumptions, after all. Though, really, he wanted to believe that Knox would like anything he'd give him, especially since it came from the heart. His eyes were wide with eagerness. "So...you like it?" he asked, the anticipation seeping through into his voice. Then Knox kissed him, and Issy cupped his cheek smiling in appreciation as he returned it. "You're welcome," he said, like a little kid who'd just been thanked for helping his mom set the table, the same eagerness and bright-eyed enthusiasm for doing something right. Yeah, he was proud. He poured wine for the two of them as they looked over the menus, and when the waiter came Israel gave him his order first before he turned to Knox and asked, "What will you be having, handsome?" At first, Israel just thought it was him being friendly. But he didn't call me handsome, he thought, and it may have been grumpy had he been in a less happy mood. But after he ordered, he struck up small talk with him, as if not noticing that Israel was also at the table. In the middle of a sentence, he cut him off and asked, "You can go now." He tried to sound polite as possible, smile on his face. He crossed his arms indignantly as the waiter left. Of course, one of the first thoughts he wondered was if he was cuter than Israel. I'm very cute, he thought with childish insistence. But it still didn't make him feel any better. "Can't he tell we're on a date?" he asked, shaking his head with a small pout on his lips. He didn't want to be grouchy for the rest of the time, but he couldn't help how jealous he got.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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He listened to what Israel was saying about the headphones, still studying the design and wondering why he’d not had a pair of these before. It was possible that it was because these headphones were fairly new. At least, he was pretty sure they were. He hadn’t been plagued by advertisements until recently, though it was such a strong word. Plague. Such negative connotation. He shook the thought from his mind and smiled at Israel again, nodding when he asked. “Of course,” he replied, and kissed his cheek again. He was really liking these kisses, though he wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was just the intimacy. That alone was odd, but hardly his place to question. A significant other was supposed to break down the walls, right? He shouldn’t even try to stop Israel then. “I do, very much.” The best way to do that was to be honest about what made him happy and what hurt him, even if he couldn’t imagine Israel doing something that hurt him.

Because it caused him only discomfort, and no pain, he didn’t say anything when Israel poured the wine for them, watching the liquid lilt up the sides of the glasses and feeling his stomach drop beneath their feet, into the fiery pits of hell. His discomfort only grew when the water suddenly turned attention on him, asking more than just the order, through which he stuttered hopelessly. As the waiter seemed intent on speaking more than Knox welcomed him to, he glanced at Israel in hopes of help, knowing he was probably being rude but quite taken aback and thereby incredibly confused and nervous. He wasn’t sure whether he was blushing or just terribly pale from the circumstances, but he was rather certain that his displeasure was obvious. He wasn’t liking whatever it was that was going on. Thank heaven, Israel spoke up. Relief filled his chest.

Knox reached to grasp Israel’s hand, trying to stop him from crossing his arms, and squeezed it lightly. “Thank you,”

[/b] he murmured earnestly, allowing a slight smile. This fell from his lips almost immediately as he registered that Israel seemed almost offended, and tried to find the logic that he was missing. He scooted closer, worried, confused, but somehow much more comfortable now that they were relatively alone again. The question surprised him just as much as the attitude did, baffled him similarly. “I… I suppose n-not?” he stuttered, not sure what Israel was talking about and why it would be relevant. Sure, it was rude of the waiter to focus on one guest more than another, but he wasn’t sure why that was related to those guests being on a date. Whatever had upset his boyfriend, the earth couldn’t figure out for his life. He just wasn’t socially adept enough. Or maybe he was just too oblivious.

Oblivious of what, though? He was only confusing himself more. Better to ask, then? He cleared his throat. “What’s wrong?” he murmured, focused entirely on Israel even as the waiter returned with their appetizer and not even noticing the man that time.
[/div]

notes, here comes the awkwardness. Poor Issy </3 ;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 5 1 7 ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! northern lights ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[/center]

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED Israel felt the stinging sense of pride when Knox said he did enjoy his present. He felt like a puppy sometimes, his goal to please the one he loved. Of course, he wasn't as hyper and Knox didn't have to clean up after him. But all the Wind boy wanted to do now was make him happy, especially on this occasion. After all, his boyfriend had made him happy from day one. And when would day one be, when he looked back and smiled on their relationship? He'd have to say childhood. That's when it all started for him. He grinned when the boy kissed his cheek, and if he was that puppy he compared himself to, then his tail would have wagged with pleasure. Of course, he had no clue about Knox's aversion to alcohol. In his mind, there was no reason for it! Most likely he'd never had it before, right? Thus was Israel's flawless logic, based on not-so-many facts and hi plain assumption of things. It was why he seemed more on the dim side, even when, after giving him a few moments or more, he could have some infallible logic. He was just not the quickest thinker, and even then he said and done some things he shouldn't have. At least Knox accepts me. That thought was comforting. They were here right now, celebrating and having fun and that spoke volumes for how Knox felt, or so he assumed. They were doing good. That should mean he could break out the L-word, right? Those thoughts had been summarily halted by their waiter, however, and Knox seemed painfully oblivious to the flirting. He didn't think about how that should have been a good thing. That his lack of responsiveness to it meant that he didn't care for it. But it didn't matter. Issy was still jealous. He knew that such an emotion displayed lack of trust, but that wasn't it. He trusted Knox; he didn't trust someone else not to realize that he had a boyfriend. As what happened now. And apparently Knox didn't realize what Issy's upset was about, which only upset him that much more. Nothing like a foul mood for dinner. He knew that acting like this was very childish, so he decided to try and make up for it a little by telling Knox what was up. "He was obviously coming onto you," he said indignantly. It sounded like he was mad, but obviously not at Knox. He'd done nothing wrong except be attractive. "I mean, I know he can't see that I l-...love you," he finished shakily, realizing too late what had come out of his mouth. Issy quickly covered it up with, "But he should realize that we're on a date." He looked down, heart pounding in his chest. It had slipped out without him realizing it, and all he knew was that he hadn't wanted it to come out so soon. But there it was, out in the open, sitting there. And all he could hope was that Knox wouldn't reject him.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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Knox wasn’t sure if it had really been obvious that the waiter had been coming onto him, but he wasn’t about to argue. He knew he was oblivious to such advances. Unless they were explicitly stated, he generally didn’t have a clue about what was going on. Well, he didn’t understand the other person’s view's, or what they wanted. He barely understood what he wanted for himself sometimes, simply because he hadn’t learned to recognize the sensations and fantasies that went along with wanting anything. He was a stranger to situations like this, but he felt terrible that Israel was upset, partially because he felt himself almost as at fault as the waiter had been for flirting with him in the first place. He was just about to attempt for something comforting when Israel continued.

His heart thudded loudly in his chest, blood rushing to his head and away from t at th same time as he tried to figure out how to react. What was he supposed to say? What could he say? Should he not mention anything in regard to it at all? Was it something he’d said on accident? But you didn’t just say something like that on accident unless you meant it with your whole heart, right? He bit his lip, watching Israel, only half-realizing that the secondary continuation was meant to cover the stuttered admission. His stomach felt like it was eating itself. Israel loved him.

He loves me.

He loves me.

How is that even possible? Maybe Knox had been hoping for their relationship to move more slowly, and thus wasn’t prepared to deal with this. But, if he was honest with himself, he wouldn’t have been prepared to respond regardless of the condition unless he’d mustered up the courage to admit to himself that he returned the feelings. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Israel. Of course he liked Israel. He wouldn’t be dating the wind if he didn’t like him. The issue was just that… well… he didn’t know what love was like. He didn’t know if what he felt for the wind leader was indeed love, or if it was intense like, or if it was just a crush, though he was fairly certain it wasn’t that last one. A ‘crush’ seemed too tame for that he was thinking about.

After all, he wouldn’t be having a panic attack about his response and screwing the whole thing up if he only had a crush on Israel, right? Well, he certainly hoped that was the case.

Finally, he decided, rather than say anything, to lean forward and kiss Israel. One of his hands lifted to cup the side of his neck carefully, the other to grasp Israel’s hand. He closed his eyes and forced himself to relax, then brushed his nose along Issy’s and opened his eyes again, smiling at him. “Would… would you rather… if-if we left?” he offered softly, and squeezed the wind’s hand gently, hoping to reassure him. They could find something else to eat. They could pick up something from the Burger King on their way to Israel’s home, and hope that no one would flirt with either of them to make the other feel insecure.

notes, Knox feels horridly guilty but he hopes that Issy understands ;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 5 4 0 ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! northern lights ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED The moments after the word 'love' came from his lips must have been the most tense he experienced in this relationship. The day of love, and he wasn't even sure if he wanted to say that word. It sat heavy in the air, hanging between them. He didn't look at Knox, not in the eye at least, his arms crossed. Simply, he sneaked glances over to him, trying to see how he reacted. The silence dragged at his skin like nails and he was forced to ask himself this question: what would he do if Knox didn't love him back? It was okay. The answer came to him immediately. It's okay if he doesn't love me. He couldn't ask that of him, could he? Not everyone felt the same thing at the same time, not everyone fell in love at once. But still, he couldn't help the twisting in his gut, the nervousness because Knox didn't say anything. Not even if he cared for him, appreciated him, any of that. Just silence. What if love wasn't even a possibility? The Wind leader couldn't help his negative thoughts, how destructive they could be to his self-esteem. It scared him, that maybe Knox didn't think he'd ever be able to love him. He craved it, Knox's attention and appreciation. He needed to know that the boy he was in love with, even if he may not love him at that moment, could love him eventually. Because he didn't want to think that it was all for naught, that he'd made a mistake when he kissed him for the first time. The mess of emotions in his brain, from the affection to the jealousy to the nervousness, made him antsy. He didn't know what to do, what to say to his boyfriend. He felt trapped. There was a ticking inside his brain that was counting down the moments from the last word spoken, from his admission to this moment and he didn't know what he would do if this was it. If Knox decided that it was moving too fast, if they were moving too fast, and said that he needed to leave. What if he left forever? Issy really liked him, he did love him, and he didn't want to think about whether or not he could get over it. He didn't want that to be a possibility. However, he didn't know whether or not to be reassured when Knox kissed him, his hand on his neck, sending a jolt through his body. His eyes closed, Issy pressed his lips softly against his boyfriend's, a hand on his chest. Eyes opening when Knox's nose brushed against his, he smiled lazily. That was enough. That's all he needed right now. "Are you sure?" He asked the Earth graduate, looking around before his eyes settled back on him. "I mean...I don't want to ruin the night for you." He felt guilty, then, that his jealousy was such a powerful thing. He was like a child, and he didn't want to share Knox. That was his boyfriend, and the idea of anyone taking him away was enough to get on the defensive. His voice came out soft then, low. "I mean...I would like...to go," he admitted, shifting a little as he squeezed Knox's hand back. He was uncomfortable, yes, and the waiter would come back and he didn't know how he would react to that again. Probabl be just as snippy. And it wouldn't be a good night for either of them that way. Who wanted to spend their birthday with a grumpy boyfriend? Israel wished he could hold back his personality for Knox's sake, just so he wouldn't have to see his bad side, but he didn't have that much control over his emotions. Sometimes he was too blunt, too open about how he felt, and he'd proven that tonight with his admission of love.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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The warmth of the hand on his chest was a comfort. At least Israel didn’t hate him for not returning the sentiment immediately, for not returning it at all yet. He relaxed against Israel, keeping his eyes closed for a moment, enjoying the amazing sensation of complete safety. It wasn’t that there had been any danger to his health a moment ago. Maybe to his emotional state, but he was fine otherwise. He was happy and safe and the person in front of him was locking that into place. Israel asked if he was sure, and he nodded seriously. He’d never been more sure of anything in his life. He just wanted the wind to be happy.

It was why he also felt immensely guilty. He couldn’t say all the things he wanted to say. He wanted to tell Israel that leaving couldn’t possible ruin the night. He wanted to say that the point of the night was to spend time together, that eating out at a fancy restaurant wasn’t the point. He wanted to tell his boyfriend that it wouldn’t matter whether they were here or at Burger King or at home—that maybe he’d be even more comfortable with the kisses if they were at home, even if it was Israel’s and not his own. Maybe he would be even more comfortable not at home, considering his parents didn’t even know, and that doubled the guilt. He took a deep breath and hugged Israel, closing his eyes. He wanted to be able to say all those things, to make his mouth work.

He didn’t know if he loved Israel, which made him feel awful, too. He hadn’t loved before. He didn’t know what love was like. He didn’t know what it felt like. He wanted to say it to Israel, but he didn’t want it to even be a possibility that he was lying, and he was just… too uncertain. And he felt so awful for not knowing what to say, and for not knowing how to say those words that escaped him anyway.

And then Israel was saying he wanted to go and squeezing his hand. He squeezed back again, nodding seriously, and stood. He pulled out his wallet and dropped two fifties on the table, grabbed the present, and tucked the wallet into the little blue bag. “Sh-shall we?” he mumbled, smiling at him hesitantly, hoping that Israel would calm down once they were out of the restaurant, on their way to his home, with or without food, he wouldn’t know and it didn’t really matter. They could order a pizza or Chinese take-out. Or they could cook some pasta of some sort, if they really needed it and really ended up starving. It didn’t matter because they just wanted to spend the evening together.

It was Valentine’s Day.

It was his birthday.

Food wasn’t as important as just having a little nice time together. They could just hang out for a few hours, and he could head home as soon as he was ready to pass out. Raine would, of course, suggest that they spend the night together, along with all the connotations he wasn’t ready for. The most severe kissing they’d done had probably been back on Halloween. The tongue thing was even a little too much for him. Just one of the many things that made him feel awful. It made him feel like he was neglected Issy sometimes, but his boyfriend would say something, right? If whatever they were doing wasn’t enough. Maybe that’s what the “love” thing was about. He was just making himself feel worse.

He waved for a taxi as soon as they were outside, scooted inside and waited for Israel to climb in and give the driver the address—he couldn’t possibly remember it himself. But he grasped Israel’s hand once it was in reach and put his cheek against the wind’s shoulder, closing his eyes, glad that neither of them had ended up having anything to drink. In fact, leaving the restaurant might have made a much better turn of events than staying could have even without the trouble ensuing from the waiter. He breathed in, and out again, and was just glad that they would soon be alone. Better ask. “W-would… would we… b-be a-alone?” he stuttered, a whisper because he didn’t want the taxi driver to hear.

notes, if only, if only the woodpecker sighs Issy were a mindreader ;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 7 3 7 ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! northern lights ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED Israel felt like he ruined the night. And here he had hoped he could do something special for his boyfriend. But luckily for him, Knox didn't seem at all peeved. Well, he never exactly seemed peeved. He'd lucked out. And thinking that, he realized that he didn't need the proclamation of love. Not now. It was just sometimes he forgot who he was with. The Earth graduate hadn't exactly been with many people before him. Well, any people. He could accept that and use that to remind himself that this wasn't like the other relationships he'd had where both people knew what they were doing. This also meant that he didn't know what he was doing either. Never had he gone along with someone like Knox, but that just made him love his boyfriend more. He smiled weakly when they went to leave. He would get better, he knew it. The boy didn't want to spoil this evening, especially when it had gotten off to such a good start. Knox had seemed to really love his gifts, and Issy gazed fondly at the flowers he held. When they got home he'd have to find a vase to put the flowers in. If it started off as well as it had, there was no reason why it couldn't end up well. Feeling Knox rest his head against him, fingers curling in his hand. He told the driver his address and looked back at his boyfriend when he asked if they would be alone. "Should be," Israel replied. "Mom and dad are at a Valentine's party." He was glad for it -- not only because they would be alone -- but because Knox wouldn't have to see them. They knew he had a boyfriend, they knew it was Knox, but there hadn't been the dinner with the parents, and Israel wanted to keep it that way. Until things got...right. He pushed thoughts like that away, however, when he paid the cab and went up to unlock the door to the front of the rather large house. Taking Knox's coat, he said, "You can go in the kitchen." He put the jackets in the hallway closet. Wearing his nice clothes felt odd at home when there was no one else around, but he resisted un-knotting the bow tie because Knox was here and he wanted to look his best for him. When he headed into the kitchen, he opened the fridge and smiled when he pulled the wine out of the side of the fridge, getting two glasses from the cabinet. He placed them on the island to pour. "Because dinner was so rudely interrupted," he said, and he did sound piqued still, though it was only residual anger, "what do you want to order? Unless you're up to cooking. I wouldn't trust me, though." He had never needed to cook for himself, so he hadn't learned. Plus, he didn't think his boyfriend should have to work on his birthday, so he would be up for ordering Thai or something similar. And maybe popping in some movies. A little romantic night, something that Issy would look forward to.

[KNOX CAESAR KETILL]

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For a moment, he was amused again at the coincidence of Issy’s surname with that of the holiday they were currently celebrating. To think even further that his parents were at a party devoted to it risked a little confusion. Was it a party only for them or for the holiday or a combination of the two? He didn’t have the breath to ask. He was just enjoying the sounds of traffic around them, the hum of the aged engine rumbling beneath them, and the warmth of the shoulder against his cheek. His mom would complain that he was wrinkling the sides of his shirt, but, quite frankly, he didn’t care. She probably wouldn’t even see what was going on. It was better that she didn’t. It was better that she didn’t suspect until he was ready to tell her about it. He was just loading more guilt on himself. At least they would be alone, though. At least Issy’s parents wouldn’t be home and at least they would have some time to sit and talk and do whatever else was supposed to be done on this sort of holiday.

Lord, he was hopeless in this situation. He squeezed Israel’s hand before they slid out of the cab. A little more connection to make up for the brief lack thereof. He couldn’t meet the driver’s eyes in the rearview mirror. He didn’t want to see the implications, if there were any. He didn’t want to guess what the driver might have seen. He didn’t want to pretend that nothing was going on between them just because he had to. The man was a perfect stranger. He wouldn’t care if he saw two teenagers being a little more comfortable with one another than most teenage boys were. It didn’t matter.

It didn’t matter because they were alone.

He could breathe again as he watched Israel unlock the door and lead him inside. He could feel the oxygen tugging into his lungs as his jacket fell off his shoulders and onto the coat hanger in the closet. And he was actually able to take a deep, surprisingly relaxing breath, as he loosened the tie around his neck. It felt weird wearing the tie without the jacket anyway. The two just sort of went together. Of course, wearing the jacket was fine without the tie, but the tie seemed like an unnecessary addition without the jacket. It made him wonder why Israel was still wearing the bowtie, though he had to admit it really suited him. It was… cute. His cheeks flushed with the thought and he looked down at the counter as he settled down at the island, almost trying to hide his face, partially because he was convinced that Issy would say something about it.

The breath that had made him feel better was suddenly stuck in his throat again. He’d never known his organs to be Olympians, but is stomach was doing backflips that would have made a professional gymnast jealous. He watched the wine run into the glasses because he couldn’t not watch, his eyes wide and trying to hide how terrified he was of the liquid. It was an unreasonable fear, but it was one nonetheless.

He didn’t think that dinner had been rudely interrupted, but he didn’t comment. He wanted Israel to forget about what had happened. He wanted to pretend there had been no flirting, even if he hadn’t quite caught onto it himself. As it was, thinking about that was probably better than thinking about the alcoholic beverages in front of him. At least it didn’t make his stomach feel like it was doing the cha cha with his intestines. “Food,” he murmured after a moment, showing he’d heard and trying to buy himself a moment to think. He wanted something without grease, but he figured the places that delivered were ones with more than enough of it. “Pizza?” He offered after a moment. You could dab the grease off pizza with a napkin. And he could ask for veggies on his half.

Knox took a deep breath and pulled the tie off completely, subconsciously scooting away from the glass of wine as he placed the bit of dark fabric on the countertop. He licked his lips, unsure how to proceed, and asked the question he was pretty sure he’d asked altogether too often since he’d known Israel, “So what now?”

notes, and there be a near-silent knox post for the issy ;;
tags ! starkeh && lovely mr. valentine <3 ;; word count ! 7 3 6 ;;
outfit ! finally picked a suit ;; setting ! valentine residence ;;
credit ! jesi-inspired, edits by lali with permission;;

[ISRAEL JEREMIAH VALENTINE]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height:300px;] I FELL IN LOVE FROM THE MOMENT WE KISSED Conflicted, Israel didn't know whether or not he felt better at home. His home didn't feel safe anymore. With his parents not home, it was only slightly better. More so because his boyfriend was there. He could be okay, he just needed to get into the mindset, remind himself that he was with someone who cared for him. Not that his parents didn't care for him. At least he didn't think so, despite their rather oblivious neglect. The Wind boy forced himself not to think about that, not now. This was going to be a good night, he was determined to make it so. Even if the dinner didn't go as he had wanted it to, that didn't mean they still couldn't have fun. He busied himself with getting a vase for the flowers, finding one underneath the island, where his mother put the crock pot and other things his brother had tended to break. The idea of pizza sounded great to him, though at this point any food would be good. He could eat a horse, though that would imply dog food and so maybe not. Pulling open several drawers before he found the right one, he opened his folder full of places that delivered and handed one for Legacy Pizza to Knox. They were his favorite, which explained why he even had them. He grabbed the phone that sat on on the kitchen counter and handed both that and the menu over to Knox. They still had a land line which was amazing, though usually it was only used for occasions such as this. "You want to half and half it?" he asked about the pizza. "I want pepperoni," he explained, not knowing if his boyfriend would like anything different. Very romantic. Though it wasn't ideal, he felt there was something cute about it. Innocently ordering pizza and hanging out for a date. Though he wouldn't want to do it all the time, it was really a nice reprieve. Inexpensive, as well. He wanted to spoil his boyfriend, however. He'd always been the type to give over giant stuffed animals as presents. He lifted his eyebrows. What now? A smile crossed Israel's face. Leaning against the counter with his hands clasped together, he asked, "What do you want to do?" The suggestive tone in his voice couldn't be masked. Too much of a flirt, he sometimes forgot that it may not be the best way to go with the perpetually shy Knox. He went on, "We can watch a movie. I'm sure there's a lot of romcoms on tonight." He had never been too much a fan, but this was the day for them, after all. Plus, everything was more enjoyable with his boyfriend. He could be getting a root canal, and as long as his boyfriend was with him, he felt it would be a-ok. He took a sip from the wine. "Come on, drink up!" he said rather cheerily, taking a sip from his own. It would be around a half hour before the pizza arrived, so they could stay in one of the sitting rooms while they waited, watching movies. He was thinking of inviting him up to his room, but wondered if that would be too much. Not that he would intentionally imply anything by it; he simply had a sizable television up there that was great for watching movies!