- - I WOULD NEVER HIDE FROM YOU (RORY)

[leif]

Leif barely left the academy - or the 'MOTHER EFFING CASTLE' as Leif called it - and wandered the exterior, he wasn't against the outdoors, not at all, he was a nature child he loved it. It was the part feelings of being locked away in his home that was keeping him in doors, most people in his situation probably would want to spend every moment outside, not Leif, he was still scared - terrified - of going outside and being hurt for it, he knew it was only paranoia haunting him, but this freedom he experienced always scared him, what if he woke up and then; BAM! It turned out this was all a dream and he was still there, stuck moving place to place every couple of weeks and being hurt physically and emotionally by his parents, he was always scared that would happen to him, he was a mess. Leif banished the thought from his head, he was never going to get over it if he kept thinking about it, anyways; the whole reason these thoughts had been brought up was because, Leif was heading outside, he was sick of being inside and the war was making staying inside to hectic anyways, so Leif was heading outdoors, into the fresh air.

Looking over the side of his bed, Leif assumed he was going to need something to do during his adventure outside other than stare at nature, leaning down he grabbed his notebook and some pens, shoving them into his messenger bag before grabbing his iPod - stolen from his step-father - and turning it on, he usually brought his laptop - also stolen - everywhere but he decided against it, and decided to go less electronic today. Peering at his mirror as he always did before leaving his room, he fixed his messy hair before leaving the room, accepting himself for today. Not like he really ever accepted himself, his mother had beaten it into his head that he was never an attractive child, and no matter what others thought, it would never change, she was his mother, she'd only tell him the truth right? She promised that to him as a kid, and no matter how much his mommy hurt him she would never lie.... He hoped.

Moving briskly through the hallways of the earth dormitory, he didn't want to be caught by his acquaintances - his word for friend - for some odd reason, maybe he just really wanted to be alone today? Because usually, Leif had no care about seeing them around anywhere, but today was different, he couldn't put his finger on why he was feeling it but he was. As soon as he got out of the dorms, Leif slipped his ear buds in and pressed play, the music was pumping loudly, the bass resonating with his heartbeat and making him feel odd, but he liked it when the bass did that to him, that why he was happy he had bass enhancing ear buds, made his life so much better. The song wasn't something that really meant much to him, sort of slipped through since he was paying more attention to the people around him, that noticed his loud music and worming his way through the crowd, until he reached the path outside.

Smiling as he had reached the path, he turned down the music and let it be a more, normal setting. Walking towards his destination of choice - the lake - Leif took in the scenery, it was a beautiful day and the plants were blooming, today luckily wasn't wet, so Leif had no mud issue as he continued down his way. It was April, the month the flowers and leaves began to return, but sadly April was before May, before his birthday, which meant, time to call mom. As Leif had promised his mother before he left, he would call her every time it was his birthday and he had skipped out on it the last couple of years, until now, he felt guilt and decided to call her after seeing an email that had been sent a couple of months ago with his step-father's bitching and his mother's insults. To most children that was a reason not to call home, but she had called him out on the promise and he decided - with the number left in the email - he would call her.

Leif looked out over the beach and at the crystal water, it was so beautiful and calming, earth and water went hand in hand according to Leif, but the earth needed water more than anything, maybe it was a metaphor? Leif held back a laugh and went over a weeping willow by the lake, sitting there, he changed his music from a heavy beat to some sort of ballad and began to write, knees propped up like a table leaned up close to his face. Scrawling down his life in a book, it was a diary in a sense, he was odd like that, he wanted to record his pitiful life and then at the end of every book he finished he would write a song, it was a personal thing not even Leif understood but he did it with no compliant, it was his quirks that made him, him... Right?

Leaning back as Leif finished his entry, he looked around for someone he knew, he was lonely now, usually he didn't go searching out his acquaintances - that meant he was attached - but right now, he was craving human contact. Looking down at his iPod, he turned the music down so it was more like a light hum in his ears and closed his eyes. He sat like that for a couple of moments before he heard the crunching of someone's feet on the newly grown grass, a smile graced his lips and he greeted the person, eyes unopened.

"Hello there!"

Words: one thousand fifty six
Tagged: rory
Comments: he's a weirdo and sorta spammed out this post, xD i hope you like it!

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[rory]

( the price to pay is so, so high )
and the irony could be cut with a knife
'cause it's my first chance, but it's my last chance.
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Rory found himself completely and utterly alone. It wasn't that he wanted to be alone, although that had been the case before, it was that he didn't really want to be around a lot of people. Crowds scared him, he never knew what to do in them. Rory hated coming off as the loser kid without friends, even if he was the loser kid with very few friends. To be honest, there wasn't much difference between the two, but there was a difference. It was that difference that Rory clung onto like a koala to a tree. In crowds, he was that awkward kid who didn't know what to do with himself, that kid who kept pretty much to himself. He didn't really know how to start conversations; he was thankful when other people started them. Talking to people was so hard for him these days, he felt like a loser even among people who could be counted as social outcasts. It depressed him sometimes. Well, actually a lot. Since he was often alone he had a lot of time to think about it, sometimes he wished he could just shut off his brain. Perhaps sleeping every moment that he was alone would be a good idea.

The sandy haired boy stared at the uneven surface of the ground as he trudged along. He hoped that he was being extremely quiet, he didn't really feel like attracting any unwanted company. Rory's hands clung to the sides of his skinny jeans tightly. He wanted to avoid having his hands in his pockets, he wanted to have quick reflexes if was to trip over the ground, or over nothing at all. Rory didn't really want to fall on his face and look like he lost a fight, he didn't want to look more stupid than he already did. His eyes were glued to his flip flops. What idiot decided to go off the path in flip flops? Oh right, Rory. In his defense, his Converse were covered in some mystery substance, he really hoped it was mud and not something else. He still took precaution and was going to wash them.

He bit his lip quietly and stopped walking for a moment to look up at the sky. What would his sister be doing now? It didn't matter anymore, she wouldn't let him join in on whatever she was doing. In the passed they'd do everything together, absolutely everything, and now... well now, she didn't want anything to do with him. That was painful, but it was life right? Lots of people didn't have relationships with their siblings. Who was he kidding, they did have a relationship, he was her biggest enemy now. He hated himself for whatever he did to make her hate him. A look of complete and utter pain passed over his face as he recalled her telling him how much she hated him. Rory stopped walking for a moment as he let it sink in. She would never talk to him ever again. It hit him like a train every time he realized it, he'd get his hopes up only to shatter them himself. Sometimes he really hated how he could destroy every little bit of optimism that he every acquired.

Rory put on a brave face and kept walking towards the lake. He told himself not to cry until he was sure that he was completely alone in his room. He hoped that by the time he got back to his room he'd have totally forgotten about crying. It was a simple solution, and there was no telling if it'd work, but there was always the chance it would. Rory just hated whenever other people saw him crying. It made him feel like a worthless cry baby.

A small sigh escaped his lips as he moved his eyes from the lake back down to his feet. Rory took a few more steps before a slightly familiar voice entered his eardrums. It startled him a little, but why would it? There were a whole lot of other people that went to school here and called it home. His eyes flew up and searched for whoever the voice belonged to. Blood filled his cheeks as he spotted who it belonged to, he froze. It was the guy from the library, the one he'd run into. He remembered he was cute too, which made more blood rush to his cheeks. He had two options now he could run and hope to God Leif thought that he'd heard some animal, stand there like a deer in headlights, or go towards him and try to strike up casual conversation. He opted for the second one and swallowed. Wait, he could do that, he didn't want him to think that he was insane, not that he probably wouldn't think that anyways. "Hi..." he said quietly. He stood awkwardly where he'd been heard, waiting for him to realize it was that weird kid from the library. Rory bit his lip and made a weird decision and took a few steps toward Leif, how scary could he be. He walked slowly and carefully, praying to whoever was listening that he wouldn't trip. He sat down a few feet away from Leif and pulled his knees up.

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words; 881.
notes; ramblyy.
tag; Leif

[leif]

The breeze moving the trees was so pleasant to hear accompanied with his music, it sounded almost.. Like it was part of the song, and that was quite magical to Leif, how nature could meld with music, he wished he could do that, just meld music and nature, but that was a random thought that was dropped the second Leif had realized how silly it was. His eyes still shut, he twirled his long fingers through his long hair, his other hand tapping against his iPod that rested inside the pocket of his skinny jeans. He was happy it was so cool today, it made the fact he was wearing non-ripped skinny jeans so much less suffocating. Also his black batman shirt was a lot more comfortable without the heat, so little and luckily it wasn't damp, so today just seemed like a cool spring day, this euphoric moment may just lead to Leif leaving the academy - mother effing castle - more often, the freedom, the feel, all things Leif was not allowed when he was home, things he would have none of in the future.

As he called out to the stranger, he cracked one eye open so it appeared closed, but in truth he was peering through his dark lashes, sure the vision was blurry but it served his purpose of seeing who it was, and once he did, he had to use all of his power to keep the heat from rising to his pale cheeks. Rory, that was the name of this enchanting boy, sandy colored hair, shorter than him - most people were - and dark eyes, he had pulled Leif over to him - metaphorically - at the library, but when Leif spoke to him, they only went as far as to introduce each other before Rory 'had to do something' and ran off, that had hurt Leif deeply and he had been dwelling on it for quite a while, what had he done to upset the boy or scare him? Maybe he just didn't want to be near him? Leif's fears erupted in his head, as his eye clamped shut once again and he fought to keep the blood from rising to his cheeks and his breathing even.

Rory responded to him in a shy voiced, the eye semi-opened once more and Leif watched as he approached wearily, was he really that scary? He had to show Rory he wasn't.. Somehow. "Come on now. I don't bite Rory.." Leif said in a quiet joking voice, watching Rory move down and sit near him, pulling his legs into his chest, he was so adorable, Leif mentally hit himself, he really shouldn't be thinking that right now if he wanted to be able to talk to said adorable boy coherently. "How are you? I haven't seen you since you ran off in the library." Leif hoped that by mentioning it he may figure out the real reason why Rory left, hurtful or not.

Opening both his eyes slowly, his opal eyes stared into Rory's dark ones, he gave a small half smile and hoped that Rory didn't notice his gushing looks. Now, Leif may be gushing out over the shorter boy, but he knew nothing about him, Leif had been to scared to make any attempt to track him down and know his group etc. all he knew was that Rory was around his age and he was cute, but that wasn't much to go off of. Leif hit himself mentally again, he really had to stop talking about how cute he found Rory, not only was it awkward for Leif - seeing at the boy was right there - but also Leif sometimes spoke out loud, or at least mumbled out loud what he was thinking right now, Rory might hear him and be even more freaked out running off, and Leif didn't want that,

Pulling out his ear buds, he took out his iPod and shut it off, laying it to the side, he was giving Rory his full attention now. Looking at him again, Leif smiled at him and gave a small wave at him, why not? What did he have to lose?

Pretty much everything, was the following thought.

Words: eight hundred eighteen
Tagged: rory
Comments: cue me spasming now... leif really likes him *cough cough* it's really odd, and leif's sorta gushing at him mentally so i hope you don't mind, and it's a little short compared to my other post hope you don't mind.. again.

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[rory]

( the price to pay is so, so high )
and the irony could be cut with a knife
'cause it's my first chance, but it's my last chance.
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Rory stared intently at the grass. He knew fine well that the moment he looked up at Leif his face would be really red and his mouth would stop working right. Talking would become completely impossible if that happened, he wished that he could talk to cute boys without turning into a puddle of teenage awkwardness and failure. Somewhere in his high school career he forgot to take the class on talking to the opposite sex, not that Leif was the opposite sex. He was the same sex, that's what made it hard to talk to him. He was into his own sex, why was he thinking about gender as sex? His thoughts were rushing through his mind at a million miles an hour. He was getting lost and wasn't sure if he could stop. Rory wished that he could take a deep breath and go back to before he left his dorm. Why couldn't he be a smooth talker like other guys? This was going to end badly if he didn't calm his thoughts. It'd start with the thinking and end with him coming off as completely insane.

He took a deep breath and rested his head on his knees. His eyes shut and with that movement he turned off the tidal wave of thoughts. Rory opened his eyes again, he could see Leif out of the corner of his eye. Rory took in his dark hair and his clothes. What was so scary about him? What about him made Rory want to run back to his mommy and hide under the covers of his parents bed? He observed Leif quietly, almost missing when he spoke. "I... What?"

[/color] he asked confused, he bit his lip, "Well you could. Babies bite and stuff."[/color] He looked down. Babies bite and stuff? He mentally beat the snot out of himself. Where did that come from? Sure babies bit, but it wasn't an acceptable practice in society. Clearly Leif thought that it'd make Rory feel less awkward, of course he'd have to go and make it awkward. It wasn't that awkward, was it? It was a fact, babies did bite sometimes. He used to bite people when was a baby.

"I'm... um... fine, I guess." he said softly, not really wanting to divulge more of what was really going on inside his head. No matter how much he wanted to talk to someone about what was happening, he wasn't about to talk with someone new to his life about it. He really didn't want to scare the other kid, and besides, he didn't even know him. "I'm sorry about that,"[/color] he added quietly. Oh yeah, he did sort of run for his life, but he needed to get away. He wanted to go hide in his room for the rest of his life. Rory thought he'd die of embarrassment. "How about you?" Rory asked a little louder than before, eager to get the subject off of himself. Rory turned his head to look at the other boy and sucked on his bottom lip a little.

The wind blew through his sandy hair, he closed his eyes and looked up to the sky. He moved his legs down onto the grass and sat with his legs crossed, Indian style. Rory leaned forward and played with a blade of grass gingerly. He loved being outside on days like today. He loved when the wind was blowing, but that probably had more to do with his element than anything else. Rory stopped playing with the blade of grass and looked up at the sky again. He pulled on the wind gently making it a little stronger. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips, and finally Rory just let it light up his face a little. "It's very nice out today." he stated, speaking for once without being spoken to, "I mean... It feels nice out." He bit his lip gently, the smile still placed proudly on his lips. He'd completely forgotten about his previous internal conflict. It was nice to feel carefree while sitting outside near the lake with an attractive man. Color rushed to his cheeks as he recalled who he was sitting next to. He stopped playing with the wind and let it do it's own thing again.
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words; 716.
notes; ramblyy.
tag; Leif

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[leif]

Through his partially opened eye, he could see Rory staring at the grass as if he was in deep thought. What could he be thinking of? Leif sucked on his lip ring, what if it was him? What if he was devising a plan to escape Leif without being as rude as last time, biting down harshly on his lip, Leif pushed himself from the thoughts, he didn't want his mostly closed eye to - once opened - give his feelings away, his eyes tended to do that; traitors Leif liked to call them, god damned traitors. Waltz Moore creeped into the ear buds and Leif visibly frowned a bit, really? This song? Leif guessed his iPod knew himself better than he did, always beating down on himself like in the song, but Leif - as usual- turned his attention to the sandy haired beauty in front of him, he wasn't going to start on himself.

Wait, beauty? Leif hid the blush from his face as usual, was he attracted to Rory? Duh, of course he was, he had been since he saw the cutie in the library and was drawn to him, he knew he was stuck, hook line and sinker, ok, not exactly sinking yet, but close enough, if he knew more about the boy, he'd probably have him, hook line and sinker, but sadly, Leif didn't know what the boy thought of him. Though, Rory seemed pretty scared of him, so therefore his dreams of his acquaintanceship was gone and he didn't know if he even played for his team so once again, romance was gone, not like it mattered since no one would ever love him - mother's words - and he wasn't allowed to love anyone - mother's rules - without her permission. Leif despite everything was a momma's boy so he listened to her despite everything, hence his complete freak out on how he broke a promise to her about calling her, it was his first real rebellion towards her - the laptop and iPod robbery was towards his step father - and he wasn't sure if he really enjoyed the feeling of disobeying her.

Leif held back another smile as Rory laid his head - cutely - on his knees watching him with intent, Leif wondering if he was observing him or if he was looking by himself, he wouldn't know, but he wish he did. He was broken from his thoughts by Rory's voice, a small half smile graced his lips, before he laughed, closing his eye again. Babies and stuff? Really Rory? The boy was just to cute, Leif just wanted to keep him in his closet! 'Hold on a second Leif, calm down,' Leif thought, before replying to Rory's awkward answer. "Are you calling me a baby?" Leif resisted the urge to crawl over to Rory and into his lap, pushing himself into Rory's face, god damn these hormones, he had seen scenes like that in movies and that was not the type of guy Leif was, and hell he didn't even know what type of guy - gender wise and sexuality wise - Rory was, Leif felt awkward now. "I promise I won't bite."

Leif's eyes opened as he pondered over the answer of 'how are you' he could answer with the obvious truth of 'No, I'm an emotional wreck that's attracted to you and want to experiment things I saw on TV with, oh! Also, I'm mourning the fact that I'm a momma's boy and will never see daylight again when I return home' but that was the stupid answer as well, so a lie came more easily, much easier.

"I see, that's good then! The war is treating you badly I hope." Leif started, he was trying to find a way to make lying seem more natural and not seem like such an obvious liar, but every moral in his body was fighting it, sure he could lie to Ashton, but that was because he didn't want to worry him, so it clashed with a higher moral, this was just over embarrassment, so the moral to never lie was winning. "I'm fine about you running off, really, you said you were busy." Liar. "I'm alright." Liar.

The want to not be embarrassed in front of Rory won this time, but the fact he was lying was evident on his face.

The wind then, became odd, it began to flow harder and seemed to be playing with them, then it hit him. Rory was a wind student, a smile graced his lips before falling again into it's half smile state, Leif didn't smile, ever. Licking his lips, he was surprised, this boy made him smile truly, he couldn't believe it, it was like.. The apocalypse, no one ever made him smile truly, it was odd, and endearing. "I agree, it's a very nice day." Leif grinned at the sandy haired boy, before returning to his haunting thoughts of his mother and the fact that the boy would never like him. "So... Your a wind student?" Leif mused, it was pretty obvious now but still, it didn't hurt to ask, it could just be a ca-winky-dink you never know, anyways it might cause Rory to ask him.

Words: one thousand
Tagged: rory
Comments: i never noticed how depressed leif really is.. it's sorta sad because i wanted him to be happy.. he likes rory a lot thogh!

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[rory]

( the price to pay is so, so high )
and the irony could be cut with a knife
'cause it's my first chance, but it's my last chance.
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Rory blushed a painfully bright shade of red. Did it really sound like he was calling him a baby? Even worse, he was wondering if he had offended him like that. He swallowed hard, wishing that he hadn't been born so incredibly awkward. It was like a disease, a terminal illness that he could never get rid of. All through elementary school he was okay, what kid wasn't awkward and shy? Then middle school separated the awkward kids from the less awkward kids, then he was sent here. It was like a never ending cycle. This was a chance to shake off his awkwardness and shyness, but of course it was like a tumor. It never went away. "No!" he yelled, a little more forcefully then he meant to, he felt his face heat up even more. "I mean, I didn't mean it like that. It came out wrong." He bit his lip silently, feeling stupid and embarrassed with his outburst. It was eased slightly with Leif's next comment, he probably hadn't taken it to heart. He bit his lip harder and made a snap decision. Rory stood up on his knees and moved closer to Leif. "I believe you."
He sat down on his rear end a few inches away from the dark haired boy. "I'm not scared of you. I didn't think you bit... unless you're into that sort of thing," he added looking down at the ground again. It wasn't really a lie, he was just scared of the feelings he had inside. In fact, he wasn't even scared of the biting, if he did bite. Biting could be fun, right?

Rory's eyes widened, "What war?" he asked, scared and confused. Did he miss out on some current events in the world? He frowned, maybe he should go online and look at the news more often. Rory's heart sunk. Clearly he'd upset him that day when he left, but Leif was trying to be nice about it. Rory looked down. "You don't have to lie about it."

[/b] He sighed softly. "I know I shouldn't have just left like that... But I was embarrassed." he admitted, "I wanted to go away and hide... So I did." His hands moved back do to the grass. "So I really am sorry."[/b] Still stuck on his idiocy in the library, it didn't occur to him that Leif wasn't actually telling the truth about how he was either. Rory was too busy thinking about how he'd offended him in the library. He was too busy hoping that he'd forgive him. He smiled a little, "That's good." he said softly, a small smile formed on his lips, although it didn't quite reach his eyes.

Rory looked over at Leif and smiled a smile that did reach his eyes. It made him happy that they agreed on something, it make him feel like they might have a chance at being, at least, friends. He bit his lip gently. At least friends? Why did that make him feel sad. Rory pushed that question out of his mind and closed his eyes tightly. His eyes opened abruptly at his next question, "Yeah. I am." How did he know? Pursed his lips and searched his mind for hints that he could have given away. He smirked a little, of course. When he was playing with the wind. Rory looked at Leif's face. "What about you?" he asked, rocking his body side to side a little more violently than he probably should have. It didn't occur to him that he could quite possibly lose his balance and do, once again, what he had done in the library. Of course, his brain never would have thought about such consequences until it happened. It happened very slowly at first. His body, moving towards Leif, and then it sunk in. He was hurtling towards Leif once again. Rory felt his shoulder press into the other boy. He could smell him too, he smelled nice. God, he was such a freak. His face became really hot and he just wanted to die.

Rory allowed his body to fall back into the grass in completely mortification. He covered his face with his arms and prayed that he might suddenly turn invisible. "I'm sorry. I keep doing that to you. I don't do it on purpose. I'm stupid, don't hate me." he said, sounding pitiful.
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words; 731.
notes;kso, i was going to ask you about that last bit, but you
weren't on. :c so i went for it, to speed things up? XD but also, it wasn't
like insanely powerful, probably shoulder brushing or something.
tag; Leif

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[leif]

Peering through his eyelashes, Leif stared at Rory's flushed cheeks, why was he blushing? Leif couldn't grasp that maybe it was because Rory liked him and thought he had embarrassed himself in front of the guy he liked, he didn't understand how anyone could like him. Instead, he thought that Rory was only embarrassed and maybe he was thinking on how someone important to him - a significant other perhaps - would've scolded him or such, Leif did that sometimes so it didn't seem that off. Leif snickered at his yelling and at his awkwardness, Rory was just so precious. "I know, I was just playing with you, don't worry." Leif had to fight to keep the smile off his face, he didn't want to seem so lovesick right now - even though he was - wait, lovesick? Leif was surprised with himself for moment, before he mentally slapped himself, 'Not like anyone would love you,' Leif reminded himself, he inwardly sighed as his mother's heartless words coursed through his head, no one would love you. "Good then, because I wouldn't." Unless Rory wanted him too was something he didn't mention.

"Oh.. Nevermind." So he didn't know? Better to leave him in his ignorance than mention it to him, ever since Leif found out about the war it plagued his mind, he was scared for the people he cared for and if some opposing person attacked him, but he was mainly worried for Nell and Ashton, Nell was sweet and didn't deserve being the main target and Ashton was his closet acquaintance and also the stand in leader for the earth students, so he was in great danger, but Rory didn't need to know and be plagued with the worry for his closest people, so unless he really wanted to know, he would keep this boy in the dark. Leif was speechless at Rory's words, he embarrassed? Embarrassed of what? But what shocked him more was that he caught the lie, he didn't think he would "Embarrassed? Why would you be?" Leif tilted his head cutely, his eyes burning with curiosity as he stared at Rory. Now, luckily Rory didn't catch this lie or else Leif would be very disappointed in himself for upsetting Rory even more, he couldn't bare that. "Ya.."

Leif smirked at Rory's smirk, yup, he was an observant one, and he felt there was no reason to answer Rory's question since, the boy seemed to find it out himself. "Me? Well... Take a guess." In that moment a small flower - a forget me not - seemed to just randomly sprout from the ground in between the two. Leif didn't use his powers much, and over using of powers were prohibited, but this was a nice thing, a small flower for Rory, he didn't feel like it was doing any harm so he just did it.

Watching Rory sway was sort of captivating, his hair swaying as his body moved, Rory losing his balance was something that didn't occur to him or to Rory, but it happened and Rory fell against him. It was unnoticeable though, Rory was light so if Leif hadn't been watching him, he might not have noticed; except for the fact Rory smelt nice, it was an unrecognizable scent but it was nice, Leif almost grabbed onto Rory and pulled him into a hug just so he could smell him some more. 'Oh god,' Leif thought, 'I'm such a weirdo', mentally Leif continued to slap himself repeatedly for even thinking, he felt like a perv or something.

He felt bad, Rory was freaking out over it, even though Leif was the one who was treating him so badly inside his mind. Leaning over, Leif pulled his arms from over Rory's face, his long black hair ghosting over Rory's skin as he smiled gently at the younger boy. "Don't worry, it was an accident, come on, how about we walk off that awkwardness?" Leif joked, hoping a walk would help himself, pulling Rory into a sitting position, Leif stood up but as he soon realized his leg was asleep, steadying himself as much as he could he leaned down to help Rory up, sadly, that idea failed as Leif's leg decided to hate him.

Crashing down on top of Rory, their lips met and Leif's eyes widened, his legs were on both sides of Rory - who as Leif observed was practically lying down - and hands on both sides of his chest. Leif leaned back as he touched his lips, they were tingling with some sort of electricity that Leif didn't understand, he had never been kissed and this was his first, to say the least it wasn't a bit romantic. He had fallen on his crush and forced them into a kiss, what if Rory didn't even like him, let alone guys? Looking down at the other boy, Leif realized he was still on top of him, but as he tried to will his body to move, he found it impossible. "I'm so sorry!" Leif's cheeks were a deep red as he brought himself back into the real world, finally control over his body returned and he moved backwards, scampering, he fought to keep tears from raining down. Leif assumed that as soon as Rory was brought out of shock he would run off and avoid the weirdo who kissed him, and Leif would be left in tears.

Why did this happen to him? Why couldn't he just be around a person he liked without fucking it up? This is why he didn't make people 'friends' because if he did, everything would go wrong. Pushing his body up, Leif moved even farther away, so that way if the tears fell, Rory couldn't see.

Little did he know, he was already crying.

Words: one thousand one hundred thirteen
Tagged: rory
Comments: this is actually so adorable, i'm dying right now from the cuteness, anyways, so leif is currently dying internally and crying over the kiss.. is that speed up enough?

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[rory]

( the price to pay is so, so high )
and the irony could be cut with a knife
'cause it's my first chance, but it's my last chance.
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Rory smiled a little, put at ease with Leif's statement. His smile grew wider and he could feel his face calming down. "I knew that," he said awkwardly, placing his hands in his lap. "Thank you. There's already enough scary people here." Rory said quietly. He was referring to those who had been mean to him and made him cry. Some of those times he'd really brought it upon himself, by losing his temper with people he shouldn't have. "I don't want you to be one of them," he admitted, looking down at his hands. His eyes examined his short stubby nails, all the while pretending to be absorbed in his observations.

"Oh." he replied feeling stupid and completely left out of the loop. Leave it to him not to know about something that was going on within the safety of the castle walls. He didn't talk about current social events, he tended to stay ignorant in that way. It was probably part of his social awkwardness, perhaps he'd just decided not to hear what the others were saying about it. He bit the inside of his cheek silently, ashamed of his idiocy. Mentally he was attacking himself for knowing nothing about the war Leif spoke of. Rory swallowed quietly and examined his hands more intently, looking up only when Leif spoke again. "Because I'm stupid. I didn't know what to say and I felt really stupid for running into you. I just get embarrassed sometimes for stupid things, I guess." He shrugged a little and forced a smile.

Rory smiled a real smile as he watched the small flower appear. He sucked on his lower lip gently and reached out to touch it. His fingers touched the petals gingerly. "It's so pretty." he said quietly. Flowers were his favorite thing to look at in nature, it probably had something to do with all their colors. Colors were something that he really, really enjoyed about the world. As a child he'd always say his favorite color was rainbow, that didn't sink well in elementary school. No one ever gave him points for being creative. "Earth." Rory stated simply, looking back up to Leif. He sucked on his bottom lip gently. "That's really awesome."

It was safe to say that Rory just wanted to melt into a puddle and just stop existing. Why was he so stupid? He didn't try to fight with Leif as the boy tried to pull his arms away from his face. Rory looked up at the dark haired boy. He nearly forgot why he felt an incredible amount of shame when he felt Leif touching him. He swallowed, his cheeks lighting up a little. He couldn't form words, it was as if his mind shut off, completely hypnotized that an attractive man was touching him in some way. "I... Uh... O-okay." He managed to say, although it was quiet and nearly inaudible. A small smile grew across his face as he was pulled up. Apparently Leif didn't think he was stupid and clumsy for his mistake. Better yet, he didn't hate Rory for hitting his body.

Everything happened so suddenly. Leif stood up and seemed to be moving towards Rory, then he was on top of him. Rory looked up at Leif in shock to try and understand what had just happened. It was impossible, it was as if all hell had broken loose. Then he realized the kicker, there was something against his lips. Leif's! Leif's lips were there. Blood rushed to his face and filled up his cheeks faster than he thought imaginable. Did this count as his first kiss? Did Leif like it or was it just an accident. Rory hoped that he did like it. He felt like crying, the least fate could do was let him give his first kiss to someone who wanted it. Leif probably liked girls anyway, not everyone liked boys. Rory forced a smile, "It's okay. I don't mind." The boy bit the inside of his cheek gently. He actually liked the position... Wait, did he? He did. He had a crush. He had a crush on Leif. The redness that filled Leif's face was indescribably beautiful. Is that what his mother had often meant when she called his own blush cute? He fought the urge to reach up and touch his cheeks. His eyes watched as Leif moved away from him as if Rory had suddenly contracted some strange flesh eating disease.

Rory pushed himself up and moved his body towards Leif, he plopped his body down in front of him. "Don't cry." he said moving his fingers to touch Leif's face. "Please. It's really okay." Rory wanted to cry, he didn't like seeing tears fall town this attractive boy's face. "I couldn't have been that bad." he said nervously, trying to ease the tension. "I mean I'm not that cute but... I... Can't suck at kissing that much." He wiped some of the tears off Leif's cheeks. He swallowed. "You may not be gay but a gay boy liked it?" Rory frantically searched his mind for anything that would try and make it better. He was failing, and probably making the situation worse for Leif. Rory shut up and sat on his heels in front of Leif, unsure of how to make the boy stop crying.

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words; 891.
notes;i meant the shoulder brushing. XD but yes.
This works. Leif is so cute. :3 i want to cuddle him.
tag; Leif

[leif]

Become? Leif wondered what he meant by that, Leif obviously didn't want to become someone that scared Rory but did Rory mean that Leif could be one? He was way to conflicted inside, was he scary? Leif knew he liked to wear copious amounts of makeup and a lot of black, but that wasn't scary was it? It was pretty much all he watched on TV so Leif didn't think so, but he could be wrong. "I don't ever want to be a scary person." Leif said a bit worriedly, he was a worry wart that needed to be evicted from his thoughts, but of course if he wasn't those things he probably wouldn't be Leif in a technical sense. He twirled his hair around his fingers tips, eyes on Rory who seemed captivated with his nails, was there something bothering the boy? Leif wondered.

His 'oh' made Leif feel horrid, he didn't mean to make Rory feel bad, he just didn't want the boy to be troubled. "Don't worry, it's no big deal really, should be over before we know it." It was a half lie, it was a big deal, a very big deal and also, it might not be over for a bit, but also it could be over very quickly so in that sense it was a half lie instead of a full out lie. Leif didn't know if he could fully lie to someone like Rory, someone so compelling and sweet. "Your not stupid, believe me, I was halfway to running myself, I can understand what happens when you get embarrassed." Again, a half lie, Leif did understand and he didn't find Rory stupid, but he would stand his ground unlike Rory, why? Because he liked Rory enough to stay close throughout his embarrassment, but of course he had a crush on the boy so it didn't really count.

"Forget me nots are my favorite flower.. Probably says a lot about myself." Leif was entranced with Rory's liking to the flower, he was enchanted with his words. Leif pulled himself from those thoughts, he didn't want to seem even more of a loser than he already was right? Sighing, Leif gave a small smile, why were forget me nots his favorite flower? It had been his mother's favorite and she used to grow them in their house in Germany, and well, Leif guessed he just didn't want to forget that moment, or be forgotten. "Yup, earth is me!" Leif said with some cheer, he really didn't know where that happiness came from but it shined through in his voice. "Thank you, but wind is pretty amazing as well." Leif loved wind, it was a comforting feel that you couldn't feel inside - just like Rory - he loved the gusts brushing up against his pale skin, it was a comfort for him, a thing he would miss when he went home - just like Rory.

The blush that lit up Rory's skin was adorable, Leif smiled as he touched the boy's skin - he was so soft - and pulled him into the sitting position, he listened to Rory's little inaudible okay and smile wider, a blush hiding from Leif's pale cheeks. "Good then!"

The mood was killed when the events of the kiss transpired, Leif was left sitting not to far from his poor victim, his hand was touching his own lips as he felt the tingle - though not the tears that streamed down his cheeks - he didn't know what to say to when Rory tried to comfort him while his body was over the other boy's. He wanted to cry out an 'it's not' because Leif wasn't sure if Rory liked him, let alone guys and this was Leif's first kiss! If Rory didn't like him than Leif would have to admit that fate hated him by giving his first kiss to a boy who had no interest in him. Leif's body trembled a bit as he tried to decide how the kiss felt, not including the other factors, it was a sweet innocent kiss and really, he liked it - not to mention the position wasn't that bad - but still, the other factors pulled themselves in and Leif shook a bit, feeling like his heart had been tugged at uncomfortably, he had a crush on a guy that most likely had no interest in him.

Leif didn't notice that Rory came closer until the younger boy spoke, looking up, Leif stared the sandy haired boy, the boy's fingers touching his cheek. Sniffling he tried to stop the tears and listen to what Rory was saying. It was okay? Rory probably had been kissed before Leif assumed which is why he was so calm about it. Though what shocked him was that Rory thought he wasn't cute - or a good kisser - he shook his head a bit, after Rory wiped some of his tears away. "Sorry.. It's just that it was my first kiss and I wasn't sure how you... Would react," Leif mumbled a bit numbly, "It's not that your not cute, I mean.. Your very cute... And a pretty good kisser.. I mean.. Ah.. I'll stop talking now." Leif's words were on autopilot as he put one hand over his lips to make himself shut up, he didn't want to make himself even more of a fool.

"You're... You're gay?" That took a little more of the worry from Leif, the tears slowed as Rory moved backwards, but they didn't stop, Leif was still a bit upset over the reasons. "Well, I guess that's a little better.. And.. I am gay, so I guess it's not that bad." Pansexual technically but Rory needed to know he was interested, not his exact sexuality.

Words: one thousand one hundred thirteen
Tagged: rory
Comments: woot! post be finished my friend, nao your turn. i wasn't expecting it to be this long

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[rory]

( the price to pay is so, so high )
and the irony could be cut with a knife
'cause it's my first chance, but it's my last chance.
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Rory bit the inside of his lip gently, and smiled. "I'm glad." he said softly. Sometimes he wondered why scary people were scary, but then again why was anyone the way they were? Some people he found scary, others didn't find scary. The same went for the people that he found mean. Then again, he was also a scardy cat when it came to people. Perhaps the people he found scary were only scary in his mind. Maybe mean people were the only scary people, and then again maybe they were having off days when they were mean to him. He looked out over the lake, deep in thought with this new found information. Then again Rory could be too sensitive, that could be why people were often friend or foe. Why was he thinking so hard on this subject? Did it even really matter why he thought anything? He did and there was nothing that was going to change his thought process.

He nodded a little, agreeing to Leif, although he didn't really know what he was agreeing with. The only thing his innocent mind knew was that war wasn't good. He also knew that it was hard not to worry about war, especially a war about which he had no knowledge. Rory ran one of his fingers over a tear in his jeans, his mind thinking through all the things he may have heard about this war. Honestly, the boy didn't really know what war was no big deal. He trusted Leif though, and he nodded again, this time a more obvious nod. Rory's eyes once again looked up and found Leif. "Okay," he said, a small nervous smile spreading across his mouth. "I am stupid, it doesn't matter though." He said, sighing a little. "I get embarrassed a lot." Rory stated softly. It was sort of a curse, he got embarrassed quite often when he said the wrong things, and that happened a lot. He was so awkward, he hated it, but he didn't know how to fix it.

Again, his brown eyes traveled down to the flower. Sometimes he was jealous that he couldn't do anything incredibly spectacular, but then he remembered that he was content with what he had. After all, he was still learning, perhaps he would be able to do something amazing soon. It was pretty impressive that he could always get the white things off of the dandelion in one blow. He smiled wider, that was an important skill... at least in his mind it was. "Is there something you don't want to forget?" Rory asked quietly, without thinking. Maybe that's not what he meant. Maybe he didn't want to be forgotten. Rory didn't think that Leif could be easily forgotten, he seemed like a really nice guy. Nice people weren't forgotten, he hoped they weren't, it'd be a shame if they were. He smiled and blushed a little, "Thanks." He said shyly. He wasn't used to getting compliments, especially from cute guys. Actually, when he was at home he got lots of compliments from his mom, but she was his mom. She loved him and thought everything about him was perfect... well almost everything.

Rory bit his lip, still a little shocked. He could almost taste Leif on his lips from their lip brush kiss. It pained him to say that he liked it because it probably would never happen again. He wanted to cry, smile, and comfort Leif all at the same time, but he knew he needed to only do one of those things. He knew that he needed to comfort his new found friend. It was devastating to see the other boy so sad. Rory missed the smile that he'd had on his face earlier, it was nice. It made Rory feel happy to just look at it. Leif's smile was contagious.

"Mine too." Rory admitted to the other boy. It wasn't what he'd expected for a first kiss, not that he'd really ever expected to have a first kiss. He looked at Leif as he listened to what the other boy said. A smile glued itself on his face as he blushed once again. "You think I'm cute?" he asked biting his lip. No one, except his family, had ever really told him that before. It felt nice coming from Leif. Rory reached forward and pried Leif's hand away from his mouth. "Don't stop talking." He said, holding onto Leif's hand gently. Rory liked hearing him speak, his voice was nice to listen to, and he was saying things that Rory'd never heard about himself from an attractive boy. Rory nonchalantly played with Leif's fingers as he held onto his hand with both of his. It was funny because Rory didn't even feel the least bit awkward holding onto Leif's hand. Normally the poor boy would have died of embarrassment, but today he was okay.

The blood that already colored his cheeks red intensified as Leif repeated what Rory had said. He nodded sheepishly, a little scared that Leif would be upset by this information. He smiled a little. "Nope!" Rory said happily, moving a little closer to the other boy. He sat down again, next to Leif, but never let go of his hand. Rory wasn't about to allow the other boy to stop speaking again. It didn't even occur to him that Leif had two hands and could easily cover his mouth again. Well, Rory also just liked holding onto his hand, so it didn't really matter.

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words; 922.
notes; :3!
tag; Leif

[leif]

Shifting awkwardly under Rory's gaze, he looked over at the younger boy and attempted a smile, he could tell that maybe leading the boy astray about the war was a bad idea, but if Rory really wanted to know about it, he should've bugged Leif a hell of a lot more, but luckily he didn't, so Leif just dropped it. "You're not stupid." Leif said quite adamantly, he refused to let this guy believe he was stupid over what happened, it wasn't an act of stupidity, it was an act of embarrassment. "So do I, don't worry, some people are like that." Leif gave Rory a reassuring smile, he wanted Rory to feel comfortable around him, he didn't want Rory to be scared of him - as he had mentioned before - so he'd do what he could to make him feel comfortable, though that wasn't his strong point, his strong point was making acquaintances not friends.

"I don't think it's that.. There's so many things I wish I could forget." Leif mumbled, he caused another forget me not to sprout from the ground and he plucked it out gently, staring at the blue petals. He wanted to forget so many thing but he couldn't, the memory would always be staring him in the face and forever he would have to live with it, but being with others helped him forget, not like that ever lasted to long before thoughts plagued him, like it did repeatedly, luckily Rory was adorable enough to keep pulling himself out of his own thoughts. "I guess I just don't want to be forgotten." There was a pain in Leif's voice that he couldn't place to the origin, his mother? His father? He really couldn't trace where that pain came from, and hopefully, Rory didn't even hear it. "Your welcome."

Leif's lips tingled with memories of the kiss, and with the yearn for more. He couldn't go and plunge himself back onto Rory, that would raise some questions, and since he knew little about Rory, he couldn't just dive back in and claim his lips once more - no matter how much he wanted to - his blue eyes stared at Rory's brown one as Leif's fingers lips ran along his own lips, trying to end the maddening tingle that had overtaken them, he wanted to forget this if it made being with Rory easier. He hoped the sandy haired boy wouldn't hate him.

It was his too? A feeling of guilt washed over Leif as he blamed himself once more for this unfortunate event - not exactly that unfortunate but you get the gist - he stole Rory's first kiss and lost his, were first kisses supposed to be this awkward? The tears spilled faster from him as his emotions were a flurry inside him, he was glad, guilty, angry, sad and lovesick all at the same time, not the best combination. "Sorry about that." Leif mumbled, referring to the kiss, he guessed Rory didn't want his first kiss to be like this - with him no less - and he had to apologize, it was the only right thing to do.

As Leif covered his mouth, he gave a small smile to Rory, of course Rory was cute! Leif didn't see how he would think he wasn't. "Of course you're cute.." Leif mumbled from behind his hand before Rory pried it away, it took a few moments for Leif to realize his hand was intertwined with Rory's the boy playing with his fingers. The heat rose to Leif's cheeks as he stammered to say something, he felt so stupid and embarrassed right now. "Really? I... Uh.. Thank you? I like your voice to." Leif stammered, his blue eyes darting away from Rory's as the heat showed evidently on his pale skin, why did he have to be so pale? The blush was even more prominent because of it.

Leif gave a small smile at Rory and stared at him a bit, he yearned to kiss the boy again and to see what would happen, maybe he could? Giving Rory's hand a light squeeze, Leif moved bit before kissing his cheek lightly, more of on the corner of his lips. "Sorry about that.. I just..." Leif started, before moving back a bit, one hand over his mouth to stop him from blabbing and from kissing Rory again. The tears had ended, he just hoped Rory wouldn't start crying anytime soon.

Words: eight hundred seventy nine
Tagged: rory
Comments: weird posti from meee, leif really wanted to kiss him again, so he did.. ENJOY

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[rory]

( the price to pay is so, so high )
and the irony could be cut with a knife
'cause it's my first chance, but it's my last chance.
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Rory shrugged a little, "If you say so." It meant something to him that Leif didn't think he was stupid, but it didn't change Rory's mind on the matter. He believed in his heart that he was stupid and that's all that mattered. His self image was in the toilet. In his heart he was less than dirt there was probably nothing that could change that. There were many ways that his sister had ruined his heart, and this was just one of them. Rory nodded a little, "You're right." He said softly, forcing a smile onto his lips. All of a sudden Rory felt a little sad. He hadn't always been like this, there was a time when he was outgoing and talkative. Sure, that was the time when he was a child and was still on good terms with his sister, but it was worth mentioning.

"I understand." Rory nodded a little as he spoke. There were a lot of things he wished he could forget, and a lot of things he could go back and fix. People always say not to dwell on the past, but that was something Rory often had trouble not focusing on. Rory frowned listening to Leif. "I won’t forget you. I promise. Who could forget you? You’re nice, and not scary. And you don’t hate me for running away from you. You’re too good to forget.”

[/b] Rory said, patting the other boy on the arm gingerly, hoping to ease his sadness. What he said he felt was true. Leif seemed to be a great guy, a guy that Rory didn’t want to forget. To be honest, he hadn’t even forgotten about him after the library. He remembered because of how mortified he was. Now that he’d actually met Leif, he felt terrible about leaving him in the library.

His eyes widened as Leif cried harder. Had he said something to offend the other boy. "Please! Please stop crying. It was bad. I… I liked it.” Rory admitted quietly. He leaned his body towards Leif, so that their shoulders brushed a little. "I’m not mad. I promise. I’m glad it was you,” he added quietly. In reality, Rory was glad that it was Leif, Leif was nice to him and cute. Mentally, Rory could hardly grasp the fact that his lips were no longer untouched by anyone who wasn’t family. He licked his bottom lip gently, hoping to taste Leif on it. A small sigh escaped his lips as he looked at Leif, "Don’t be sorry.” Rory said in an almost whisper, "I don’t want you to be sorry.” Rory wished that it would have been acceptable to rest his head on Leif’s shoulders, perhaps even cuddle with Leif. He made no move to embrace the boy though, he didn’t want him to think he was weird. He licked his lips again and looked down at his legs. He didn’t know what to say to make the other boy feel better. It was times like these he wished he wasn’t so awkward, not that he wanted to be awkward ever.

An adorable smile sprouted on Rory’s face and grew into a grin. He was happy now. A cute boy thought that he was cute. Rory felt giddy, and happy. He wanted to hug Leif, but he made no move to. "I think you’re cute too.” He said happily. He rested Leif’s and his own hand on his own lightly washed jeans. It didn’t occur to him that Leif may not have wanted to hold hands. He just didn’t think about that, he was far too happy right now to think about that. Leif’s blush was cute, he understood what his mother meant when she said that his blush was cute. He used to wonder how a blush could be cute, he hated when he blushed. Rory wanted to reach out and touch Leif’s pink cheeks, but he refrained from such behavior. "Thanks.” He said, smiling happily at Leif.

Rory watched Leif lean over and kiss him again. He wished that he had turned his head toward Leif or something. The boy bit his lip gently and frowned a little as Leif covered his mouth again. He moved to grab Leif’s other hand and remove it from his mouth. "Stop doing that.” he said holding Leif’s hands awkwardly. There was one solution that Rory could think of doing, although his face was going to light up like a Christmas tree. Rory let go of the other boy’s hands and turned Leif’s head to face him gently. Slowly, Rory leaned over and kissed him gently on the lips. The blood rushed to his cheeks as his body reacted to his actions. Did he really just kiss Leif? He pulled away after a moment and smiled. "Now stop apologizing, or I’ll have to start.” He bit his lip gently and turned back to the lake. He felt like he was on cloud nine. He’d never done anything like that before.

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words; 863.
notes; awh. c:
tag; Leif

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