|
Post by marci on Jul 19, 2011 13:30:03 GMT -5
Logic be damned. Two days, Elaine had been wandering about the entrance to the dungeons in her free time, hoping beyond hope that she'd see Alex. It was not because she suddenly felt like she'd been in the wrong, it wasn't because she was suddenly ready to deal with everything again and try to end the war. And everyone knew it was not because she needed his help. No, she wracked her brain the entire time, really not understanding where this compulsive behavior was coming from, and she'd only hit on one solution; Ace.
Ever since he'd kissed her, she hadn't been able to get Alex out of her head. At this point, it was getting to where she would like to ram her head repeatedly against a stone pillar. There was something utterly wrong with her psyche, utterly messed up in the way her mind put things together. And it was leading her here, to the precipice of walking into danger just for the sake of talking to him again. And risking his anger, and risking him telling her that he actually decided her didn't think of her as a friend, and that she should leave.
The blind girl sighed, facing the entrance to the dungeons. She must be insane.
After another couple of seconds of hesitation, she finally gave in and started down, entering the black dungeons, with the musty smell of dust and very, very old forgotten things entering her nose. She raised a hand to send a gust of air sweeping through the crypt, her face blank and as she silently evaded unfamiliar people. The darkness of the dungeons meant nothing to her, nor the vastness. Save the ceiling, it felt like being outside. Other people would be at a disadvantage here, but she was actually in a place where her handicap was given to most everyone else.
This in mind, she was not as nervous as she might have been. She knew that the dungeons were lit in some areas, and frequently populated by many of the more aggressive elementals. But she also knew that this was the best place to look for Alex. Lord, what was she doing? Now that she had started on the foolish quest, she shoved the cynical thoughts to the back of her mind and kept searching the dungeons with her wind. Nothing. For a very long time.
Elaine began to tire, so when her wind found a light, she moved toward it to see if it was lit. Soon, she was rewarded with the feeling of mild warmth on her skin. Her lips tugged slightly upward in a grim smile as she decided she would just wait for him to come to her. If he'd come to her after the last time. Too emotionally dead to try to lure him in with crying, she just sat down beneath the light and waited, her wind moving in a large, lazy circle around her.
It was not long until someone saw her, but it was not her friend the fire leader. She turned her head toward the sound of footsteps, judging it to be a very large someone, male, and based on the quiet snickering, not a friend. Most people knew who she was—it was not hard to remember the single blind girl in the school. So she let out an inward sigh as she stood and faced him, ceasing the searching wind in favor of a slow current in the air immediately around her.
”Need a light?” The boy asked, obviously amusing himself. It had to be at least a junior or senior in highschool, based on his voice. ”Or are you just lost?”
Elaine shook her head, ”Looking for a person, not trouble. Please go away.” Her right elbow was healing slowly enough as it was, with all the movement from the past few days. She didn't want to get into a fight and mess it up even more. But if the guy pushed it, she wouldn't back down. Elaine didn't back down on anything. The fire in his hand—which he was using as a torch—flared up a little as he spoke.
”You're a little too small and fragile to be wandering around here, aren't you?” He asked, a vile undertone masked by his concerned voice, ”Someone might just see something as pretty as you and snap it up.” Elaine tried not to gag. Wonderful. Maybe it was just the war, but she was getting he brunt of a whole lot of primitive emotion recently. She opened her mouth to tell him off again, her tone going from polite to emotionless, but he caught her off-guard by moving forward and taking hold of her right arm. Elbow, actually.
It had probably just been a scare tactic, but with her long sleeves down, her brace was hidden from view. Pain shot through her and she felt her stomach turn over. A bit of a yelp escaped her before she could stifle it. This guy had a strong grip. He seemed a little taken aback by her reaction, gaining a couple second's hesitation. She tried to used that time to pull herself away, but his grip was still strong, and she was soon tasting bile. Heat rushed into her face as a vasal reaction to the pain, and she closed her blind eyes against the pain. ”Let go....” It came out as a whine.
The light above her must have been dim, because he brought his fire closer to her to get a better look. Soon she could hear the evil smile in his voice. ”See? Fragile. Come with me, I know a place that's much safer than these dungeons.”
[/size][/justify]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 19, 2011 15:00:48 GMT -5
Alright, so maybe for having helped instigate the start of the war, this whole thing wasn't really working out for Alexandre. Having everyone attack your personality and call you a murderer was kind of making him go on the defensive. The decision to side with Thunder had been impulsive--he'd been approached with the idea of Cyn's death and the fact that they wanted a war so fast that he'd just gone with his immediate thought, and that had been to back up his allies. Was he regretting it now? Well, Alex had been sitting in the dormitories for half an hour trying to convince himself that he'd only 'done what he had to do' and that he was 'totally fine' with the idea of Nell going down. As long as they avenged Cynthia's death and this war could come to a stop, Alexandre was trying to tell himself that everything would suddenly be okay again. That everything would fix itself up and he wouldn't even have to spend a single minute thing about the girl whom he'd inadvertently helped kill.
What was worse: his parents had found out.
"Fucking Lucas," he snarled under his breath, naming his brother and making a few people sitting near him glance up from what they were doing. No one was really focusing on the homework some had set out in front of them. Grades usually dropped in the war. When you were busy trying to survive and to keep a level head, school was the least of your priorities. Power control classes just went to shit. You spent the entire day attacking and defending from your fellow students, and then they stuck you out on the grounds with a teacher and decided that doing the exact same thing would be a good idea. The professors were half-sympathetic and half-ruthless, depending on which side of the war they were on. Which side you were on. Alexandre felt that many of his professors were taking out anger on him since it was technically 'his fault'. Gah! I didn't start it! Everyone was treating it like he did, but Alex himself didn't feel that way.
"What'd Lucas do?" A girl whom he was friends with furrowed her brow at him. "Told my fucking mother. Now all she does when I go home is bitch at me about how fucking wrong it is." Even Shane, a Fire elemental at heart, had stern words to share with his son. "I don't want to hear it. I'm tired of hearing it." He slammed the book shut, knowing full well that the idea of working on the project due on Monday was the stupidest one he'd had yet. He wasn't going to get this project done if his life depended on it, and he also didn't want to stay cooped up in the Fire dormitories. "I'm heading out," he told his friend, who just nodded as if she understood. "If anyone's in desperate need of anything, tell them I'll--I'll deal with it whenever." Truth is, he didn't know when he was going to get around to dealing with all of the problems that had cropped up. He was usually a respectable leader, but leading an element through war was hard. Everyone wanted the backing of their element for every single fight, and people could only be in so many places at once.
He hadn't been expecting to see Elaine, and when he did he immediately had a reaction--leave. Alexandre was just about to turn and walk back in the direction from whence he'd came when he noticed that she wasn't alone. Just as he watched, the boy grabbed her arm and he heard a yelp from Elaine. Alexandre wasn't quite sure why he felt so angry. She'd made her side in the war clear enough and so they had every right to attack her. Alex was still pretty pissed off about the way she'd treated him the last time they'd spoken, how she'd dumped all of the blame for this war on his head just as everyone else seemed to be doing. It wasn't fair! Why did everyone have to attack him? But that didn't matter how. What mattered was that he wasn't letting go and she was clearly hurt and the words 'do something' consumed his thoughts. Alexandre wasn't one for playing the valiant hero, but when it counted he'd step in and help.
Like now.
He caught the words of the fellow elemental when he closed in, and Alexandre's jaw clenched. "Yeah, so do I," he said roughly. There was nothing charming or attractive about the ferocity of his tone as he pulled back and clocked the boy as hard as he could in the side of the head. "The medical wing." Any attempt to attack Alexandre with fire was just met with the boy's retaliation--he easily stole the power of the other and threw it back. Normally he was not this good with his element, but rage could do scary things to an elemental. It wasn't until her assailant left that he turned to Elaine and glared, a little awkward. "Like I said," Alex half-snapped, "They have no right unless I tell them to. You shouldn't be down here." It was stupid for her to be hanging around the dungeons. He turned, about to leave. He had no wish to talk to her and have it turn into another fight.
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 19, 2011 16:13:07 GMT -5
Almost immediately after those words were spoken, Alex's voice came out of nowhere. Elaine's eyes opened with surprise, though for some utterly irrational reason she felt the rest of her body relax. Time froze, and for a split second she had doubts as to which side Alex was actually taking. After all, she had basically made an enemy of him the last time they'd spoken to each other. Oh, how she wished she could make him understand how much she regretted it! If she could, then he'd certainly help her, instead of whatever he might do now.
But all doubts ceased when his fist collided with her assailant's head. This was more than sufficient to knock the boy the hell away from her, but unfortunately he still had a heavy hand on her arm. He actually tightened his grip as the blow landed, making him wrench and twist her arm before contact was broken. Elaine broke out in mute tears, her mouth opening and then snapping shut. All her willpower was focused on keeping herself from crying out, so she was unable to speak when he addressed her. No matter how much she tried, she knew she couldn't open her mouth without a strangled mass of agony escaping.
He was just turning and walking away when she hugged her arm toward her and managed to get out through clenched teeth, ”Alex.... Wait....” Elaine was one hundred percent certain that Alex had never heard that tone before. Everything that was not pain was pleading. It was even more desperate than the one she'd used on Ace when she'd been completely at a loss. It took several moments more for her to gain control over herself enough to relax her jaw enough for freedom of speech. She was panting. And perspiring. Nice.
”Look.” Damn, this was difficult. She felt a great need right now to throw up a thousand walls, mostly because she was already so vulnerable because of the pain. But it was Alex, so she trudged on through the muck of the apology. After all, she did mean it. ”Alex, I was so angry last time, and really, really irrational. Some of the things I said.... I still believe, but....” She lifted her head a bit, wishing she could see his expression. Her own was covered in pain, made even more impressive by the tears that had streaked it. She wondered if it was light enough for him to see it clearly.
”I was wrong. I should never have insulted you, and this isn't your fault. You don't control what other people do, and you couldn't have known what would have happened. I understand that now, and I hope you'll forgive me.” He wouldn't, though. He should have, with how painful those words were to say. But Elaine was certain he wouldn't. He'd already walked out on her once, so why wouldn't he do it again? She actually hung her head a bit, lowering it in her usual defensive gesture. Then she started shaking, and it wasn't all from the pain. Hugging herself, she added in a whisper the words she should have said first. ”I'm sorry.”
[/size][/justify]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 19, 2011 18:07:59 GMT -5
Alexandre heard Elaine cry out, and it felt like the sound was grating on his eardrums. It seemed to drag out for longer than it actually had, and he made a face as if something was bothering him. Why did it bother him? He didn't understand. She'd picked stupid Nell the Earth student over him anyway. Besides, it wasn't like many of his other friends turning sides had bothered him this much. He'd basically just told them where the door was and started to ignore them. But yet when Elaine got hurt, when Elaine was in trouble, he felt like helping. Ugh. What a bother. He was trying to convince himself that she was just being a stupid, sensitive girl and that the pain was probably nothing--if only to feel better about the fact that he was so upset with her.
Of course, it didn't work.
He almost went after the Fire student, but reminded himself that the boy was his ally and this was his element. He was supposed to be protecting them and sticking up for them, not punching them and watching as they scurried off into the darkness. He struggled with his confusion and emotions for a moment before he turned on his heel, deciding that he would leave in the opposite direction of the boy just to make sure he wasn't tempted if they ended up in some dark corner of the dungeons together. He was just deciding where the hell he would go after he got as far away from her as possible that Elaine spoke.
"Wait?" he said stiffly, though admittedly he turned slightly so that he could glance--or was it a glare?--over his shoulder. She was crying, and the sight of her tear-stained expression made him falter for a moment. But only a moment. "Why should I?" He turned all the way around so that he was facing her, a spark of anger flickering in his blue eyes. Blue, the exact contrast of the fiery anger the lurked there like a snake about to strike. That snake was held back by some unseen force called self-control, though he didn't have a lot of it and it might just run out fast. "You insulted me, blamed a war on me, and you as good as avoided me for weeks before that. So why should I?" He felt as if these were the sorts of things he was allowed to ask someone who'd played hide and seek. Of course, it was he who'd been avoiding Elaine lately. He wasn't really sure why. Was it out of anger, or fear he'd hurt her?
He hadn't been expecting an apology. To be honest, Alexandre wasn't really sure what it was that he had been expecting. More bitching and yelling, he supposed. He was sick of being yelled at and if Elaine had went off on another one of her tangents, that was probably exactly what he would have done: proved how sick of it he was. Alexandre had a fuse when it came to his friends. It wasn't short, but it wasn't endless. He had put up with her the first time, but had she went off on him again he figured he might have been unable to stop from attacking her. Blind or not. Injured or not. There was only so much you could push a guy. He was already on edge because everyone else was hounding him!
The Fire elemental blinked at her, staring with uncertainty. "You're sorry," he said, not sure whether or not he believed her--whether he wanted to believe her or not. "I guess I might have said shit I regret," he admitted with great difficulty, jaw working painfully as it clenched. Might have regretted? Well, he wasn't perfect. Admitting he was wrong about something wasn't as likely as Elaine's admissions were. "Why the change, huh?" His tone was almost accusing, doubtful. He wanted to believe her, but it was hard.
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 19, 2011 18:59:16 GMT -5
He didn't want to. Elaine felt her heart drop as she heard the muted venom in his tone, sensed him turning and looking at her. Her shoulders slumped a bit as she felt the pang in her chest. Damn, she'd been right, he wasn't going to forgive her. He really hadn't cared enough to try and keep their friendship alive. Damnit, damnit, damn him. But she'd already put in all on the line, she wasn't about to become a hypocrite and start shouting at him again. Because there was still that think, maybe guilt, maybe something else, that made her feel inferior. Like maybe she didn't deserve to get angry at him again.
He listed when she'd done wrong, and she winced internally. But she still went ahead with what she'd been planning on saying. Elaine was desperate, and only barely hiding it. She didn't even know her emotions enough to understand her own motives, she was just going with what she felt. Which wasn't usual for her. And what she felt was that she'd really enjoyed hunting for bears with him, talking about fifty random things in a single conversation's time and laughing with him. She'd been really thankful when he'd come to her when she was crying, and she was really thankful now that he'd come to her again.
He repeated her words. If possible, her heart sank further. But at the same time, she heard some sort of relenting in his voice. Her head raised a little when he continued, and she didn't even try to hide the cautious expression that she felt was there. The only way to get him to believe her was to be completely genuine, right? Damn, this was killing her. Every instinct within her told her to just close up and walk away now, before he made his decision. At least that way she would never have to hear him reject her.
Elaine let her arms drop slowly. Well huh. She let her open and close several times over before she could think of anything to say. Then, finally, ”I don't know.” She paused, unable to think of anything else. It took a few moments for her to add, ”I've had a really shitty time. And you've...always been good at cheering me up.” God, what was she saying? It was the closest she would allow herself to get to I missed you. But it was still weird to say. More than anything, Elaine's reason for coming was because she just wanted his company again. To hell with the war.
[/justify][/size]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 20, 2011 6:20:03 GMT -5
[-pokes muse, then hides- Where did you come from...? o.o]
Elaine seemed like she was deflating in front of him, like a flower wilting in the heat. A frown played the edges of his lips like an instrument, expression conflicted and ever-changing. He was trying to appear as icy and callous as possible, but that was very hard when your mind was messing up your train of thought and a girl with whom you'd once been great friends was standing in front of you injured and apologising. Why did she have to apologise? It made this whole stupid war that much harder to deal with. He didn't know what to do with an apology--he just didn't. Alexandre was friendly and cheery, open and bubbly, but when you faced him with a conflict it was like sliding a brick wall in front of him as he ran. Dead stop. No idea what to do.
His teeth were clenched in stubborn determination not to show any sort of emotion or weakness, and as his jaw started to ache the strangest memory of his mother's scolding came to mind. "If you scowl at me for too long, Alexandre Gryffin, your face will get stuck like that." He'd been gullible enough as a child to believe it, but now it sounded ridiculous and why the hell did his mother come to mind at a most inconvenient time as this? Now he was being swamped with things--how she'd scolded him about the war, how she refused to listen to his side of the story, how she had teased him gently when Lucas had told her about Alex's friendship with Elaine. Shut up! he snarled internally at himself. Just--just shut up! It felt childish, arguing with himself, but these were things he really didn't want to be thinking right now.
Elaine didn't help when she said that things had been bad lately. It wasn't like he was stupid--everyone could guess that things would be terrible for others during the war. But it made him feel strange and almost guilty. No, no guilt, he tried to chastise himself. I've got nothing to feel guilty for. And yet she thought that he did. He almost wanted to rip his thought process from his brain, for it was not helping at all right now. "I--I guess you're right." Fuck, was that ever hard to say. He remembered how he'd cheered her up when she was crying, remembered going bear hunting, talking about ice cream and girlfriends and silly things like that. The big bad Fire leader and the little blind Wind girl, an odd friendship indeed. But it had worked, and now it sounded like she missed that friendship.
He hadn't realised until now--suppression was a remarkable thing--but... perhaps he missed it too. Just a little, he thought stubbornly, not wanting to feel too much about how right she was. He hated admitting defeat, but he was sort of backed into a corner here. He found he couldn't look at her for a moment, so he glanced away and rubbed nervously at the back of his neck. What was he going to say? Should he make casual conversation, should he leave, should he just admit defeat and wait for her to get to the point? "It's, erm, it's a bit hard to be cheerful with everything that's going on right now..." Why the hell were his cheeks turning red? He was nervous and awkward and he'd be damned if Elaine had just managed to make him feel flustered. He was so confident and cocky he didn't think it was possible. A sigh pushed its way from his lips. "What happens now...?" He didn't have the energy to be all full of smiles and chatter as he usually was. War just sucked that right out of him.
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 20, 2011 9:46:46 GMT -5
Elaine let out a long breath that had been tight in the throat for several seconds. Her demeanor lost a bit of it's dejection when she considered the few words of agreement he'd just spoke. He was giving in. Although she was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, the blind girl very much wished to know what she had done to top both his pride and his anger in a matter of a couple minutes. He was still very hesitant, but Elaine could tell from his tone that he was starting to at least get close to forgiving her. She just wished it hadn't taken so much pain on her part.
There was a long pause, then she heard movement from him and, shortly after, his voice. She ducked her head a bit with a an unusual smile, thankful that the pain had already caused her face to go red. Yep, there it was. He didn't seem to be able to get the words she wanted to hear out of his mouth, but this was enough for now. His tone was moderated and he was talking to her in a sort similar way to how he used to. She shrugged a bit when he asked what happened then, taking a short and cautious step toward him. Anyone watching might think she was a little scared of him, but she was just trying to make very sure she didn't make him uncomfortable.
Taking a deep breath, she started talking slowly. ”Well....You give very good hugs, so... you could start with that.” She actually shuffled one of her feet nervously as she said this (what was wrong with her), but a bit of a smile hung on her lips afterward. So far being honest had been working out, and she hoped this would be no different. Though she was not a humongous touchy-feely person, there were times when it was just what she needed. Then, she shrugged again and added, ”If that doesn't work for you, you could just tell me you forgive me?”
Elaine didn't now if she really felt better now. Sure, she loved Alex's friendship, and would give just about anything for it, but there was still something nagging at her. Something was not settling right about the events of the past few days—namely, the kiss. Ace was popping in and out of her mind, now. Though is was not nearly as incessant as the thoughts of Alex, it was almost as confusing. And now that she was standing in front of Alex, she was starting to realize a few things. Things that she really, really didn't want to realize. Damnit.
The small wind student bit her lip, angling her head down uncomfortably. She really couldn't think about this until the war was over, anyway. And it did matter what other people thought, though she really hadn't ever operated that way before. Then a though popped into her head. Ace had kissed her right outside a huge party. Then he'd picked her up and carried her off to his car. No way that could happen without someone seeing. It was only a matter of time until the rumor mill carried it all the way to Alex's ears, war or not. Or maybe—her heart sank—it already had, and he just didn't give a damn. Oh god, that might be worse....
[/justify][/size]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 20, 2011 14:32:26 GMT -5
Elaine was smiling again, and though he didn't smile back just yet--it would have been lost on her regardless, but that didn't matter--he was at least relieved that she wasn't sobbing and screaming and acting a hysterical mess. He didn't know what would be worse--Elaine being angry with him, or Elaine bawling her eyes out because of him. Whatever the case, she was doing neither and so he was more than happy to just keep the mood like this. But then Elaine asked for a hug, and Alexandre hesitated. Should he do that? Should he allow himself to take down his anger and toughness enough to hug her again? He was trying not to seem too apologetic and vulnerable--pride, as usual--but the guilt!
Shaking his head furiously, he abandoned caution and just stepped forward, wrapping his arms around her awkwardly. He was uncertain, so the hug was not tight or suffocating; it was almost as if he was trying to hug her without touching her, it was so light. He was confused, he didn't know what to make of this. He stayed like that for a long moment, breath caught in his throat and emotions having slammed into a brick wall and slid down. What was this? What was he doing? Alexandre had not heard about the kiss and he was too stubborn to come to terms about his own feelings involving Elaine quite yet, but it felt unlike anything he'd ever experienced when hugging someone before. Guilt? Why did he feel guilty?
She wanted forgiveness, too--was that something he could give? Alexandre withdrew slowly from the hug, biting down on his lip so hard that he tasted the tang of blood. He wasn't good with this kind of thing. "You struck some low blows." He didn't want to admit that they'd been painful blows as well, that the things she'd said (especially the slander on his masculinity) had upset him. "They won't--they're not going to go away just because you apologised." His mother had spoken those same words to him once, harshly and irritably when he'd upset her. He realised now that it was true. He believed that Elaine was sorry, but she couldn't just take back what she'd said. She wasn't the type to say things that she didn't mean, right? "I guess..." He sighed heavily. "I guess I can forgive you if you promise you'll try not to bring it up again."
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 20, 2011 18:59:29 GMT -5
Elaine really hadn't expected him to hug her. It had been a long shot of a request, and she had expected him to change the subject, or not do it, or just flat out say no, even though he was less hostile to her now. So she was very pleasantly surprised when he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her. His though was light, though. Much less comforting, as if made her wonder whether he had really wanted to touch her at all. But she accepted it while she had it, lightly wrapping her good arm around him, pressing her face against his chest, allowing herself to be swept away from a second in his warmth and strength.
While he was holding her, it was somehow easy not to second-guess her impulses or rag on herself for being so vulnerable. When he let go, however, it was not so. Her face started burning as she began to realize all the more what she had been feeling just a second ago. It was the pang of his removing his touch that made her truly realize how much she wanted it, and that was what scared her half to death. She almost took a step away from him. Almost, because there was also an urge to take a step toward him again. And she couldn't decide before it was too late.
There it was. Her breaking point. She visibly winced when he brought up what she'd said again, her blank expression turning into a rueful grimace. ”I'm anything but proud of that.” She whispered, though she kept her cool. The wind girl bit her lip, screwing her blind eyes shut just so that she could feel the pressure. She couldn't think of anything else to do. A breeze of her own making brought Alex's warmth and scent to her, and that made her feel a little better. But not much.
”Those words are nothing.” She said, surprising herself with her vehemence, ”Alex, even if I did mean them then, which I really, really hope not.... I don't mean them now, and I never will again. I promise.” More force entered those words than she thought had ever mingled with anything else she'd ever said. She was actually scaring herself with how strongly she felt about this, how badly she felt, how far she was suddenly willing to go to make it all go away. Alex was worth it, he was worth being vulnerable for. She took a deep breath and said again. ”I promise.”
She waited a few moments, and then added with caution, ”Do you want the war to end?”
[/size][/justify]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 21, 2011 8:08:35 GMT -5
Alexandre wasn't aware that she was still yearning for the contact as he pulled away--he wasn't psychic, and his own mind was consumed by other things. Perhaps if he could push the threat of war and death and destruction out of his mind he might be able to realise it in her expression, but Alex Blackthorn had never been good at organising his thoughts. It was actually half of the reason that he could never carry on one conversation for a long period of time, or that he had to switch between different pieces of homework during one sitting so that he didn't get too bored and frustrated. So Elaine and thoughts of her were taking the forefront, but they were constantly being criss-crossed and intercepted by a ton of other different things.
It had nothing to do with how he felt about her. He could be on his knees and proclaiming his eternal devotion to the girl and he'd probably still have a thousand things whizzing through his brain at once. It was just how Alexandre's brain functioned. However, her words were important enough that he managed to shut down most of the other thoughts and focus on what she was saying when she spoke to him. Silence was bad for his brain, but at least when he was trying to formulate a response to her words he could be a little more intent. "Why did you say them, then?" His lips were dry again and he licked them nervously. "Why would you say something that you didn't mean?" But then he realised that he was doing exactly what she'd done to him--demanding answers for questions that just weren't that simple. He shook his head forcefully. "Forget it," he said. "You don't have to answer that."
Did he want the war to end? He was surprised by the question--did he want everything to stop? He certainly wasn't happy with the way things were going. Everyone was getting hurt whether they were the target or not. That hadn't been his vision of how this was going to play out. Hell, Alexandre didn't have a vision on how things were meant to play out. He had just nodded and agreed with the Thunder elementals on instinct, and then tried to justify everything in his own mind when he'd later been forced to come to terms with what he'd done. Do I want this? Do I... no, no, I don't think I do. It was a painful realisation. Alexandre swallowed and said quietly, "I don't think I ever wanted it to begin with." He didn't want Nell dead, he realised this now. They could outcast her for what she'd done to Cyn, but solving murder with murder was...
It's wrong, he sighed to himself, just like everyone says. His own parents had been disappointed in him as well. Stupid Lucas. His brother just had to go and ruin everything for him, didn't he? "But I can't stop it now," he said, sounding strangely deflated. "What do you expect me to do about it?" It still hadn't clicked with Alexandre that Elaine had been down here because she wanted to find him. He wasn't the quickest person in the world when it came to things like that. It wasn't that Alexandre was stupid, he just rarely searched for the hidden meaning in things. He would take everything as up front and the way it appeared, and to Alex it just seemed like she'd been idiotically strolling through the dungeons when one of his own had decided to attack.
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 21, 2011 10:13:37 GMT -5
It was a very good thing that Alex caught himself. If he had not told Elaine that she could be silent about the questions, she might have snapped. Just as he was asking them, her head moved in an exasperated way, as if blindly searching about for some sort of handle on herself. Her mouth opened a bit, and she found herself suddenly angry and defensive inside. Good god, I'm apologizing to you. You can't expect me to answer that, you can't make me try and justify something I just told you was wrong. Those words were about to spill out of her mouth when he told her not to answer.
She let out a long breath, realizing exactly how thinly she was spreading herself. This was hard, and she was so constantly composed and quiet on the outside by default, that she wasn't letting him in on it. And she couldn't, at this point. She didn't trust herself to stay calm while opening herself up any more. The girl took a deep breath, starting to feel fidgety and itchy and not at all like standing about anymore. But she'd just asked him a rather important question, and so instead of interrupting his thoughts, she just sent a breeze through the dungeons again, feeling Alex and the cells and the different rooms and hallways. There were a few people within the reach of her wind sight, but only barely.
He answered her, and she gained a softer expression. Relief flooded through her—maybe he could help to make this all go away. It would be a long shot, but Elaine had to believe it was possible, for Nell's sake. And if Alex could help—there were no words that would be able to convey what she'd be feeling if he accepted what she'd come to ask him. If he actually managed to pull it off. Elaine was so elated by his answer, his sad answer only sort of brought her down. She raise her head so that he'd be able to see her frown, and her voice grew just a little bit commanding.
”Alex, did you just suddenly forget that you are the fire leader?” It was said in a sort of bullying pep-talk sort of way, coming from a place Elaine really hadn't realized that she had, ”You didn't get that position just for good looks. If anyone can stop this, it's you, and if you're willing, I'd like you to try.” There was a sort of peace offering in her tone as she said this last part, as she was keenly aware that this was broaching on the subject that had hurt him before. The blind girl stepped forward, tired of using her wind to see him. So she lightly laid a hand on his chest and angled her face up towards his.
A small, hopeful smile hovered over her features. A part of her was hoping he didn't do something like back away from her, but somehow she doubted her would. Elaine tilted her head a bit, and said after a short moment, ”Would you like to meet with Nell and hear her side of the story? Her alibi, and that sort of a thing?” Though Elaine had not yet run this past Nell, she thought it was the only way to fix things. And Nell had already shown a great trust in Elaine's opinions. She hoped that since Elaine trusted Alex, Nell would try to, as well.
[/size][/blockquote]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 22, 2011 8:38:18 GMT -5
He almost raised his voice and started arguing when she brought up the Fire leader thing again, having thought that they'd cleared up the fact that he couldn't do everything on his own and that not every decision was solely up to him. "Elaine," he sighed irritably, shaking his head. He took a deep breath to stop from going into a rant, but he was nevertheless firm in his words as he said, "You're right, I didn't. I got the position because I was elected into it, but I can be overthrown and elected out just as easily." He'd seen it happen and it was a rather swift and decisive process. A group of the Fire students merely had to band together and order their leader to step down. They could overpower your singular authority if they came after you in a group and if you didn't get enough support, well, you were screwed. That was it.
"It's not like I'm the sole commander of the student population," he frowned. He had agreed to help start the war, he hadn't started it alone. There had been three other conspirators, two of whom had made their decision before he even knew about it. No--three of whom. The femme fatale of Fire students had also made her choice, she'd just asked him for his as well. "I've got to get my partner to agree with me, and she's not exactly been in the highest of spirits about this whole war thing." It was for the exact opposite reason as Alexandre. Alex was starting to doubt his decision to help start it and she was wanting to get her hands on Nell so that it would be over with.
His jaw worked again. She wasn't making this easy for him. "I'm one of four. The Thunder students are pretty damn set on the idea that Nell is a cold-blooded killer." They were going to keep fighting until they took her down or they were taken down themselves. Right now it didn't seem like either side were coming out on top aside from the fact that the enemy alliance had thus far managed to stop his own side from reaching their goals. But they had the same amount of injured. Alex's side of the alliance had the most betrayals, unfortunately. Why the hell did the Fire and Earth students have to get along so well? Alexandre didn't have any friends in Earth. They all seemed too soft and flowery for his liking.
She'd like to see him try, apparently. Alexandre groaned and dragged his fingers through his hair. "How am I supposed to convince two entire elements to step down?" he said, shaking his head softly. "You make it sound so much simpler than it is." It was frustrating him, but Alex really was making an admirable effort to keep his temper in check. He was trying to convince himself that Elaine was only trying to be hopeful and save the life of her friend. "I mean I could try and get them to listen to me, but if they're opposed I'll end up being thrown out like the rest of the traitors and then we'll be back to square one." That was the problem. That was what he was worried about.
Elaine asked if he would hear Nell's side of the story, and the Fire leader scowled for a moment. It took a long pause for deliberation, his mind battling his common sense on this one. He was trying to convince himself that he wasn't meeting a murderer, only a murder suspect. "I... fine," he said, stressing the word as he forced himself to be decisive. "I'll meet with the--I'll... I'll meet Nell." He swallowed hard. This might just cost him his position. "I think we could use the meeting room for the leaders--it's the, uh, pseudo-supply closet in the mess hall." Usually only the leaders found out it's true purpose, but he supposed that would be the safest place to meet with her. "Would you arrange that...?"
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 24, 2011 13:15:14 GMT -5
The force of his words depended greatly on hard easy it had really been to get the position. Elaine didn't consider it to be something that most students voted for on a whim, even the impulsive fire students. It took a lot of sway with the student population to be put in a position of authority. But the blind girl kept her mouth shut, hugging her right arm closer to herself as she head the anger start to return to his voice. Apparently her apology had not been enough to keep this from being a tender point. She'd have to prove to him that she didn't mean him any insult. Thinking for a second, she nodded and painfully forced herself to say, ”I understand.”
Alex continued. Elaine took a deep breath, trying to keep the patience out of her voice as she said, ”I know you've got a lot at stake, Alex.” It was resigned, though, so hopefully it would not spark another argument. Elaine was tired, and not in the mood to try and force her emotions into obedience when it came to this boy. So she did what she felt it best to do—in preparation of the rest of the discussion, she carefully pieced up a few more walls between herself and Alex, making sure that she could be sufficiently apathetic to whatever he should say. ”Do you know whether or not your partner would prefer the war end?”
Her voice had turned rather bland, but there was still that wish for peace there. Elaine bit her lip, thinking silently as Alex told her the state of the thunders. If she tried to forget that it was Nell they were trying to kill, she could make herself understand a little of what they would be feeling. Elaine was not that close to her own wind leaders, but she would be pissed to all hell if some of the other students killed them. But Alex wasn't a thunder, and he couldn't control them, whether or not he wanted or agreed to. So that seemed of little consequence to the wind girl.
”Two?” Elaine frowned a bit, but kept quiet long enough to let her friend finished his explanation. With a very light smile, she shook her head. ”No, Alex. Just one.” If he could make his own element go neutral, then the thunders would we completely outnumbered. Eventually they would have to back down, because they wouldn't be able to do much against the defending earths. Nell would be that much safer, if only the fires would drop out of the war. The blind girl hadn't considered that Alex hadn't considered just going neutral on their own. It had been one of the first things to pop into her head. Shows how differently the two thought.
Elaine could tell before the boy had spoken that her request was not taken well. Suddenly the atmosphere became tense, and she found herself moving slightly as though she needed to prepare herself for something. It was not out of fear, or real belief that Alex would hurt her, but she was burned out in the whole rolling with the punches thing. The girl just wanted to sleep, really. But she didn't force herself to relax when he agreed, the venom of reluctance not failing to reach her ears. Oh well. She'd take one last blow in order to make this work, then.
”Good.” The girl said quietly, a quiet smile forming on her lips. Then, she nodded slightly, ”Yes, I can, though if you think you're meeting her alone, you may want to check on that.” It was said almost as a warning, though her tone was friend and even a little concerned. Elaine was well aware that Joshua had been beside Nell for every moment he possibly could during the war, making sure she was not attacked or hurt. It seemed rather far-fetched to assume he would just let Nell walk into a room alone with Alex. And Elaine's name was mud if she let Josh and Alex in the same room without her there to calm the waters. But instead of throwing all of this on Alex immediately, she just asked, ”When can you do it?”
[/justify][/size][/blockquote]
|
|
|
Post by alexandre on Jul 25, 2011 10:53:23 GMT -5
Elaine said that she understood, but Alexandre didn't really believe she did know what he was going through, what he was risking. The Fire students had always accepted him. He'd had some friends growing up, but nothing could compare to the constant support and camaraderie that you got if you were a Fire elemental. He didn't really want to lose all of that because he didn't know what he would be forced to do without it. At the same time, he didn't really think he had the heart to kill in order to keep it. A frustrated expression found his features as he dragged his hand back through his hair, not sure what he should do. He was absolutely screwed if this went wrong, so should he even try? It wouldn't be of much use if he was the only one that went neutral. Fire would just find a replacement that was all gung-ho about the war and they'd ensure that this new guy didn't betray his element as Blackthorn had.
Yet, while he didn't really want to lose the support of the Fire element, he didn't want to lose Elaine either. And even though she was trying her best to play the role of the neutral girl, the one who didn't take a side, he had a feeling that he would lose her as a friend if he kept going like this. She was unique in his circle of friends, unlike any of them had ever been toward him. He'd never felt this protective over a girl before and it was throwing him off a little. As he confronted himself with the possibility that he'd be throwing this friendship away if he continued with the war, he realised that it was something he most definitely did not want. However, he was forced to admit the truth and shake his head when she asked if his partner was willing to step down. "Not at all, I don't think," he said reluctantly. "She supports it fully. Apparently she liked Cynthia, or something." The people who had lost a friend or at least a close ally were the worst contenders in this war. Blinded by the rage of the fact that the Thunder leader was dead, searching desperately for someone to blame. Alex and Cyn hadn't been close in the least, however, so it didn't affect him quite so much.
He blinked when he realised that he had misunderstood Elaine, that he had really just wanted him to try and convince his own element to step down. A frown played on the Fire leaders lips as he considered this--did he really have the means to accomplish this, at least? He thought about one certain war where Thunder had not backed up the Fire element; he'd not been in school as it was quite some time ago, but Fire had been thrashed by the combination of Earth and Water. If his element were to back down, the Thunder elementals would have no one to shield them from the wrath of the Earth students. He could definitely see where she was going with this now. "That... might work..." It felt in a way like admitting he was wrong, and while he hated that it was at least a way to salvage the friendship. Damn it, why did he have to have friends? This would have been so much easier if his loyalty had been to no one and he could make his own decisions without having them swayed from left to right by two completely different factors--Elaine and the Fire element.
He didn't get what Elaine had meant at all, his brow furrowing in obvious confusion as he glanced at her. "What, you mean you want to tag along? You don't trust me...?" That stung for a moment, even though he was well aware that it made sense for no one to trust a leader in an enemy alliance. He had to admit that he harboured some pretty intense feelings of animosity toward Nell and so it was actually safer if Elaine came with him just in case Nell said something that sparked his temper and made him want to attack. Alex doubted that he could kill someone even if Nell did turn out to be guilty, but he was definitely alright with causing some serious burns. She asked him when he wanted to meet with the girl. "As soon as possible," he sighed in resignation. "I want it over with. The quicker the better."
|
|
|
Post by marci on Jul 25, 2011 14:50:59 GMT -5
A small, unlikely smile appeared on Elaine's lips. It would have been bigger, but this was no laughing matter. She just found it funny—the way Alex had said that, it sounded as though he couldn't fathom his co-leader of the fire element liking Cynthia Bainbridge. Elaine herself had not liked the girl, who had been one of her biggest bullies. But she found it funny, that all of this fuss was being put up for a young woman that it seemed barely anyone had liked anyway. Still, the blind girl contained herself, her expression only barely portraying the emotion for him to see.
After a second's thought, she sighed a bit, ”That might be difficult.” She paused, opening her mouth a little wider. Then she pressed her lips together and shrugged. She couldn't think of any way to make sure that the female fire leader allowed this, especially since she was fairly certain she'd never met the girl. If she'd felt that Alex would have taken it the correct way, she'd have said something along the lines of 'but I'm sure you'll be able to do it anyway.' But that was a recipe for disaster. Elaine had a hard time just saying things like 'I believe in you.' It was way too mushy for her. People had to earn words like that from her.
Her smile gained a little volume when Alex reluctantly gave in again. Apparently just being all vulnerable was the perfect way to pull his defenses down. At least, that was what the girl told herself. She was not ready to delve into the full spectrum of their emotions for each other. Thus far, friends was enough. Alex sounded hurt, however, when he answered her little warning. Oops. Elaine frowned a bit, wishing she had made a little better sense. But she also could not help considering the fact that he had not snapped at her when she said, ”I trust you, Alex. I wouldn't have come down into the dungeons alone searching for you if I didn't.”
There was more truth to that statement than she'd originally realized. But she shoved that to the back of her mind as she continued, ”But I know of at least one person who would kill me or you or both for shoving Nell into a room alone with you. So I, at least, will come with you guys.” It sounded almost like a command, but no one had ever said the tiny blind girl could not assert herself. Though her tone was kind, it rebuffed any thought of argument, hopefully with enough power to keep Alex from fighting with her again. He didn't seem to be in the mood, anyway.
”Alright.” She nodded, much more comfortable now that her mind had something productive to focus on. No more tangents about Alex or about the war. The girl's mind was whirling as she tried to figure out where exactly Nell would be, whether or not this should even be mentioned to Josh, etc., etc.... After a few moments' pause, she said, ”Day after tomorrow, breakfast, early as the mess opens. That work for you?”
[/justify][/size][/blockquote]
|
|