you weigh me down [caleb]

[MONA FAITH LANDRY]

With winter nearing its end, Maple Hollow took a noticeable turn in climate. Being so far up north, temperatures still barely broached seven degrees, but that was still considered too high a temperature for snow to fall. Mona missed it, strangely enough. She never used to like the snow. But in the months that it began to slowly disappear from her life, she found that she liked the bitter chill and liked seeing everything white and dead and quiet. Peacefulness may have been what she missed the most, she realized as she saw people walk in and out of shops as she headed to the park where she told Caleb to meet her.

Seeing a woman with a basket in her hand, she realized that people seemed to always be waiting for the next holiday. since the moment Valentine's Day passed, stores set out decorations for Easter and people had begun buying chocolate and plastic eggs in preparation. Pearl had told her that they were just going to use the ones they had in the basement from last year, maybe put some change in little candies in it for the younger siblings. But Mona didn't want to celebrate holidays anymore, and so she didn't stop to head into the chocolate shop as she passed it.

Instead, she walked through the wooden gates of the park, heading to the playground. She sat on a swing, the one her brother had flipped over till it was wrapped around the top bar when they were kids. Taking out her phone from the pockets of her, she texted Caleb to tell her where she was, ignoring the other thing in her pocket that poked at her cold fingertips. She swung lightly as she waited, listening to a child on the slide with his mother encouraging him to go on down. She turned her head, but didn't smile and a moment later returned to gazing at her feet.

When Caleb did arrive, she took the little dream catcher out from her pocket and hold it out to him. "I told my sister I was meeting you and she told me to give you this. She's been making a bunch lately." The Thunder girl shrugged, one hand still holding onto the chain of the swing, even though she had stopped moving. "You can throw it out if you want, I don't care." The little circles made of twigs and beads meant nothing but kindling for fire. Though she didn't tell him, she had several hanging above her bed. She didn't want to throw them out. "How're you doing?" She asked out of politeness, resting her head against the chain and looking at him with flat gray-blue eyes. They used to look like storms.

[caleb]

The last few months were hell for Caleb. He wasn't the kind of person to get stressed out easily, but that was because he had friends to lean on and beers to drink. He was the kind of guy who, no matter how tough things got, liked to let the good times roll. But he couldn't do that right now. Because all of his friends were leaving him. Or maybe it was just Hunter. He hadn't seen the thunder since that party where his best friend chose Caleb's ex over him. He felt betrayed. And then there were a lot more people falling by the wayside at the expense of that. He was tearing himself apart because of this bizarre after school special shit that he was putting up with from Cassadee and Hunter and Kennedy in their weird love triangle. And it was leaving him constantly doubting all of his other social interactions. Caleb didn't look for loyalty often, but the fact that he couldn't get it from anyone worried him. He needed at least one person to lean on. And that's where Mona came in.

Mona had been someone that actually wanted him. And while they hadn't had much interactions before or since she asked him out, he knew that she'd be willing to do things for him. More things than Hunter would. And that was a plus. He may have been using people, but he was using them to rebuild himself for once, instead of destroy. And that was a good thing. Because he needed that. Now it was only a matter of getting what he needed, because he had a habit of wrecking everything before he could actually get his hands on it. He got a text where Mona told him where she'd be, and he was glad to go and meet her. This would be good, and while he'd never admit it, maybe he needed her right about now. Then again, maybe he didn't. And maybe this was a huge mistake. Time would tell, he supposed.

Caleb greeted the girl with a smile, and when she offered him a gift, he gratefully accepted. He was getting soft right about now. The old Caleb would have just dismissed everything entirely at that point, but he was trying to make everything work right now, and that meant taking gifts, smiling, and being nice. Boyfriend material. The thought almost made him cringe. But it was true, that's what he was shooting for right about now. Just to prove that he could be redeemable. People had tried to change him so many times that he was beginning to lose certainty that he could change at all, and the thought of being trapped worried him even more. "Thanks so much, darling," he said with a grin, taking the dream catcher. It was cute. He wasn't sure what he'd do with it, but it was definitely a nice gesture. And when she told him that he could throw it out, he shook his head. "I think I'll hold on to it," he replied. He'd probably get rid of it later, but not in front of her. It was a trap that he didn't want to fall into. Caleb pocketed the dream catcher and took a pack of cigarettes out in their place, bringing one to his lips and lighting it quickly with his disposable lighter. "You want one?" he offered, taking a drag. "I've been marvelous," he replied to her, lying through his teeth. She wouldn't know better though, unless she was keeping tabs on his life. But even she couldn't like him that much. "How 'bout you?"

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[MONA FAITH LANDRY]

Mona smirked when he called her darling. Even though she often found it annoying and weird, it came off as endearing from him. The fact that he actually accepted it seemed kind of surprising to her. It was weird, yeah, but she hadn't the heart Sibill that most people didn't like kitsch things that wasted space. "Thank Sibill." She scuffed her boots against the ground, already sunken in from other kids who'd done just that. "She's the Rembrandt of the family." It almost made her wonder where she fit in now. Almost.

Mona watched as he pocketed and shook her head, looking down for a moment before she heard the click of his lighter and the smell of a cigarette. "Sure," she responded to the offer. They could get into trouble, but if either of them cared about that they wouldn't have been in the park. Or they wouldn't have skipped school. Or smoked in general. It really was a lesser crime of theirs. She lifted an eyebrow. "Marvelous? With a word like that, I'll blame your mood on some form of narcotics." It sounded like something her mother would say. Or any woman above the age of forty. "Yeah, no...that's good," she said, a hint of kindness in her voice. Only a hint, and nothing more.

He asked after her, and she laughed. It was her usual laugh, filled with sarcasm and insincerity. "Oh, I'm fantastic." Instead of simply mocking him for the use of weird words, she shook her head and actually explained herself. "No more social life for me," she said as if her social life actually meant friends and not just parties and hanging out in parks at night smoking bud with strangers. "I spend most of my time babysitting. But whatever, you know, someone's gotta do it." She twisted in her seat, listening to the creeks in the chains and letting them remind her of a time when she would be here with her friends, with Adam or with her siblings, and it felt like that life belonged to another person.

She flicked her eyes back to his. "You need to help me, babe. Recollect the parties you've been going to and people you've met so I can live vicariously through you." Mona waved her hand with a flourish, the gesture saying, go on, entertain me, my friend. Caleb should have been honored -- he was one of the few people she could actually hold a conversation with, one that wasn't entirely snippy and sarcastic.

[caleb]

Pet names had saved Caleb's life on more than one occasion. He was prone to forgetting the names of people who weren't important to him - namely, people he'd slept with and never wanted to see again. And while he certainly remembered Mona's name, it was best to just stick to hi habit of calling everyone some kind of pet name, because then it wasn't uncharacteristic of him to use them when he was stumped. His life was all about tricking people into thinking that he cared, and he was damn good at it at this point. There was a lot of practice involved, but he was a master by now. "I'll have to," Caleb replied, as the subject briefly shifted to Mona's sister. He had to wonder if good looks ran in the family. And he had to wonder if sleeping around did as well. It probably wasn't a good idea to try and score with the girl's sister, but he never stopped thinking of his next conquests.

Mona mocked his word choice, and he wasn't sure exactly how to respond. Marvelous was a weird word. And if it weren't Caleb speaking, marvelous wasn't a word that could be dropped so nonchalantly. Still, Caleb was Caleb. He didn't give a fuck about using whatever words he pleased, or about anything else for that matter. Everything was falling apart around him, and if he wanted to use the word marvelous, he'd damn well use the word marvelous. The histrionics were probably attributable to his recent misfortunes. Though he was still good at swallowing down his emotions and carrying on conversation. He handed her a cigarette before speaking. "No drugs today," he explained. "Got any?" he asked with a smirk. He was always up for a good high, and really anyone who hung out with Caleb was usually holding something. When it came to drugs, or anything else really, Caleb wasn't picky.

Babysitting sounded dreadful. Really, watching kids was a terrible chore, and Caleb's heart went out to Mona for undertaking such a task. People tended to compare watching Caleb destroy himself to babysitting, and if they were similar, he wondered why anyone would want to do it. Because at least Caleb was fun to look at. What did kids have? Nothing. Caleb wasn't sure what to say when Mona asked him to recall the parties he'd been to. The scene was dying. It probably had something to do with the fact that he and a few other party kids were avoiding each other at this point. It was killing the symbiotic environment that they'd started, which was a drag. For lack of a better thing to say, Caleb took a long drag of his cigarette, and exhaled the smoke through his nose. "You still wanna date me?" he asked. He never thought that it'd come to this, but sex whenever he wanted didn't seem so bad now that his usual methods were less effective than they'd used to be. He had to wonder how long this one would last though. Supposing that Mona still wanted him at all.

[/size]

[MONA FAITH LANDRY]

Mona felt weird whenever she was with Caleb now. She'd never truly had a crush before, and a lot of that was because she told the other person. Her first crush and she'd approached the boy, hit him in the arm, and said that he was her boyfriend. Poor Mikey Hill. It didn't work that way with Caleb. Even normal conversation like this and she felt so on edge. So this was what unrequited love was? Love, I don't think so, she thought. She didn't do much of that, and the only time she felt an emotion as strong as that was when her mother gave her a graduate cap in the fifth grade and when she took care of Max when he'd gotten sick. But romantic love was something that she had never experienced before, and she had no way of knowing exactly what she felt for the Fire boy next to her. Attachment, affection, she could identify those things, but did they add up to love? She didn't want to think too hard on it, else she would take her mind in circuitous routes that ended up nowhere.

All she really knew was that she enjoyed seeing Caleb like this. She didn't know better and he seemed happy. She liked to assume things like that when she had no other information. She liked to pretend that other people were really all right when they weren't. She took the cigarette between her fingers, lit it herself. Mona didn't pretend, ever. Everyone knew she was a btch. "Yeah, let me just whip out my heroin," she joked. Hard drugs were definitely not in her line of sight. She could only imagine how her family would react if they found out. Or maybe they wouldn't care. "I got some bud at home." The second was more serious. It was stuffed in one of the pillows she didn't sleep with, a small dime bag. She would kindly offer if Caleb wanted any, as long as Pearl wasn't around. Mona would have appreciated living in a separate room from her sister.

She was content to simply smoke in an area they really should not have been smoking in, but since when did they care about shit like that? As long as no one came around to kick them out, they were golden. She was content with silence, especially on a calm day like this. Everything felt peaceful, and for once she felt okay. Not good, not marvelous, but okay. When Caleb did speak, she blinked and stalled for a moment. Not wanting to seem too off, she answered quickly enough. "Yeah, I guess I do," she said steadily. "What, is this your way of offering?" She kept her voice neutral bordering on scathing, not wanting any optimism to shine through. Maybe she was just too hopeful and he was going to end up saying, yeah, I've decided that I wouldn't want to go out with you. No chance there. Goodbye. And that would definitely hurt her. She was both bracing herself and praying for the best.

[caleb]

Caleb didn't believe in love. This was mainly because he didn't see the same person twice, and he refused to let himself get attached to people. It was a sign of weakness, and not one that he wanted to show. He was against letting people see him sweat, and he was pretty good at not flinching, not blinking, and not falling in love. Because love was what people called getting so used to having someone in your life that you'd fall apart without them. It was all about habituation, and the only habit that Caleb seemed to have was smoking. That and waking up in the bedrooms of random strangers. Strangers who wouldn't love him, and who didn't expect love from him. The perfect people that he'd never hear from again. He'd heard someone refer to these kinds of people as single-serving lovers, and that was something that he loved. They were useful, and disposable. Caleb was amazed when people actually fell for him, and while it was rare, it happened much more often than he would have liked.

Caleb rolled his eyes at the girl's sarcasm. Here he was, asking a real question, and getting a joke answer. He was more than disappointed. Most of Caleb's friends would have pulled something out at that point. Maybe they would have asked for a few bucks, but they would have handed him a piece or a blunt almost immediately. That was what he was used to at this point: ask and receive. And that's probably why he was on this downward spiral. Maybe that was okay though. Maybe he was meant to be the person he was. It'd sure take the pressure off recovery, at the very least. Luckily, she offered something real a moment later. Weed sounded pretty good right about now. Then again, it never sounded bad. To him, nothing ever sounded bad. Everything was a new adventure, and even if he spent nights locked in a bathroom and puking his guts out, he'd chalk them up as learning experiences. "Should we go to your place, then?" he asked with a suggestive grin. Weed and a chance to seduce this girl once again sounded like a good way to spend the day. Better than anything else he could think of.

So Mona was still interested in him. That was good. Sure, he was just going to use her, but she didn't have to know that. For all she knew, he was finally ready to settle down and focus on one girl. Like he could ever do that. He'd probably have jumped any better offer, but he wasn't seeing much at the moment, and Mona was fun to be around at the very least, so here it was. "Yeah, I guess it is," he stated flatly, taking another long drag of his cigarette. "Sorry, I'm new to this, am I supposed to get down on one knee, or do you jump lovingly into my arms or something?" he asked sarcastically. Maybe it wasn't the best way to ask someone out, but it was certainly the best that anyone would get from Caleb. He'd only dated one or two people, depending on what people considered dating, and he regretted both immensely. Hopefully this one would be different. Hopefully he'd get more out of it.

[/size]

[MONA FAITH LANDRY]

Mona almost winced when he asked whether they should go back to her place or not. She had to remind herself that most likely, no one would be around. But there was also the fact that she felt...embarrassed, she supposed. She was poor, her house was usually a mess, and this was her crush. It didn't add up too well. But still, she didn't think he had too high standards. If he was a snotty rich kid, she might have been more worried about it. But this was Caleb. She didn't know him as well as she bet his mother did or something, but they were friends. "Yeah, we can see." She supposed it would be better than sitting out in the park all day. There was only so much they could get up to. Well, legally. It was still cold out, a little snowy, so that hampered a lot of stuff.

Well shit, he was asking her out. In his own way. He apparently wasn't sure on how to do that, something he expressed when he asked if he should get down on bended knee. "Haven't done this before either, but I'm pretty sure you can stay where you are." Then she smirked. "Unless you want me to run into your arms. Or you know, something else." It was still taking its time to sink in. Probably why she was still joking and actually not giving a proper answer. In her mind, she'd already given him the answer. She supposed that made it clear enough.

Figuring that she might as well give him a straight answer, she said, "Yeah, I'll go out with you. Simple as that, really." She believed it was simple as that. Not like they had to exchange rings or anything. That was a little too binding. Still, she did her best to hide her enthusiasm. She was not some blushing schoolgirl, she was not going to debase herself like that. Caleb was playing it cool. Then again, he always played it cool so there was nothing much to say there. He may have been kind of unconventional about it, but the actually matter of it was all that she needed. "Wanna hit up my place?" she asked him, still rocking a little bit. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to do a lot more, because hey, he was hers now. That felt good to think about. She hadn't felt like she belonged with anyone in a while, but she supposed that she had a boyfriend now, didn't she?

[caleb]

Going home with Mona seemed like a great idea. He hadn't been laid in weeks, and this dry spell needed to end as quickly as possible. Confident in his abilities, Caleb knew that he could get her into bed in a heartbeat if he had the right environment, and her house seemed like just the right place. Supposing that there weren't others in the house. He didn't know anything about her family, and didn't know how big her house would be, or how many people were living there. Not that he really had to judge, seeing as he could more or less live on the streets when it came down to it, but he needed the house empty for what he had in mind. Drugs and sex. That was the perfect combination in his eyes. Hell, that was pretty much the only reason why he was daring Mona in the first place. There were probably others that would have been just as eager to date him, but he wasn't going to risk anything on those relationships when he had Mona, the almost sure thing, right in front of him.

For a moment, Caleb was scared that he'd been wrong about her being a guaranteed yes. She wasn't answering him straight out, and that worried him. If he was wrong, it would have destroyed him. Not because he needed her in his life, but because he needed to be accepted by people, especially in situations involving sex and romance. He needed people to think he was attractive, and seductive, and good enough to keep around, even if he really shouldn't have been kept around. Caleb just relied on complete acceptance, it was what fueled him. That and attention, which were more or less the same monster - both feeding his pride. He raised an eyebrow at her when she asked whether or not she should run into his arms. "What else did you have in mind?" he asked with his typical smirk.

Then she gave him a real answer, and he felt a hell of a lot better about everything. She wanted to go out with him still, and she accepted his most nonchalant of offers. That was good. They were moving in the right direction. His plan was coming together quite well. Well, the half of a plan that he'd concocted. He was just getting out of the party scene and calming down for a while. Which wasn't like him at all, but it'd save him a lot of stress and hassle for a short while. And that was what he needed the most. "Good," he replied, leaning toward her and kissing her softly. That was one to seal the deal. If she was having any doubts, he was hopeful that this would be enough to seal the deal. He was a little overconfident when it came to his charm, but that was because of the way that people reacted to him. They fed his ego and made him who he was - the person who was trying to manipulate a girl in order to keep himself sane. "Sure," he replied to her offer. Everything was going smoothly here. Just the way he wanted it.

[/size]

[MONA FAITH LANDRY]

If Mona had known she was a part of a plan, some piece in a grand design, she would have been hurt. That was the obvious part of it, something to be taken for granted. The unexpected part? How much, even if she didn't think of it, she would have expected it. She didn't think positively of herself or the world around her. Life sucked, bad things happened to good people, and she had no one to prove her wrong. So how surprising would it be for her to be manipulated? Honestly, she liked to think she was smarter than that and that's how she approached every situation. She was in control. She couldn't be a victim. Nothing would be worse than what she had now. And that would be the big surprise. At least right now she had Caleb. Caleb and his bad boy behavior that could lure any girl in like an angler fish. She was simply prey.

It took her a moment before a smile graced her face. In such a short time, she had become what people called a whore, even when she denied that. She had slept with anyone who would pay attention, but now she didn't have to do that. And for a moment she wondered, was that why she got into this relationship? Because a boyfriend meant attention? A significant other wouldn't tell her they couldn't hang out because he had to see his friends. Or shouldn't, anyway. That's what this whole thing meant, right? Mona didn't realize before how sorely prepared she was for this, but then again she hadn't expected the offer again. It didn't matter. Right now all that mattered was that she would be one her way to getting some. "Something with more body parts involved than arms," she told him, her expression enough to let him on.

Mona kissed her boyfriend back with a smile. Boyfriend. She would have to get used to that. Leading the way back to her house, she scuffed out the cigarette under her shoe before going up the walk. Their grass hadn't been cut recently, and the house was a squat little thing. "Hey," she called out when she unlocked the door and opened it, stepping into the hallway leading to the living room. She looked over to Caleb and said, "Looks like no one's here." She had to check her room, however, and found that Pearl's bed was empty, on the wall across from hers. From her pillow, she pulled out a bag and passed it him before pulling out some papers from the school bag she'd placed against her pillow. "To commitment," she said with a snort, handing the papers to Caleb

[should we ftb here??]