[Ela, if you ever read this, I'M SORRY XD]

Josh leaned against the bar counter, staring blankly at the bottle of beer in front of him, just thinking. She'd been away from him for months now. Not only that, but she was pregnant with four children, and he didn't think that he was ready for kids. At all. He'd grown up as a total prick, sleeping around with half the girls in the fucking Academy and then treating them like trash afterward. He had an incredibly bad reputation around the school, and still some girls were willing to take a chance with him. He hadn't gone off with any of them, desperately trying to stay on track despite the bumps in the road that was his life. Slowly but surely, however, Josh was slipping over that imaginary precipice. Sooner or later, he was going to take the plunge over the cliff, and who the hell knew what would happen then. Now, he could wait out his tragedy, or he could seize the bottle of beer he'd ordered ten minutes ago and down it quickly, numb the fucking pain and push himself off the cliff. The latter option, while it seems incredibly masochistic, was the most tempting. He just wanted rid of all the stupid depression. Hell, before he'd met that girl he'd been perfectly content with getting smashed every night and partying with different girls every weekend.

Josh reached forward blankly, grabbed the bottle and popped the cap, pouring the liquid down his throat, feeling the warm burn of alcohol and waiting for the pleasant relief that would soon follow. He ordered three more in rapid succession, until nothing around him mattered, except for the fact that the girls sitting along the counter were looking considerably hotter. He whistled drunkenly at one of them, giggling at himself. Yeah, the beer in this place was some strong shit, it didn't take much to knock a man down. And yet he ordered another, drinking half of it without stopping, setting it down on the counter so hard that the liquid sloshed over the top a little, splattering against his arm. He didn't give a fuck, though. He didn't care about anything. And that was when he started to hate her. What had she done but caught his wrist and dragged him down with her? He wasn't going to stay loyal just because of the children. He'd broken plenty of hearts before. And that was when he had decided. Turning to a random girl, he grinned slightly. "Hey," he said, the word slightly slurred, but not enough to be illegible.

[Bad Josh, bad XD]

Josh noticed that the random girl he'd turned to was actually smoking hot, and he checked her out shamelessly in his drunken carelessness. Now, from most girls this would earn him a slap across the face, but she dressed like a whore, so he figured she'd be a hell of a lot easier on him. In fact, she'd been stealing a glance toward him earlier, and he wondered whether she was interested. All he knew was that he wanted to shake the love for Alexandra out of him mind, wanted to cleanse his thoughts of the girl who he (drunk, mind you) believed was ruining his life, bit by bit. And now he realized that she might have some sort of a fucking conspiracy against him. She might even have faked the pregnancy just to fucking play with his mind! Yeah, that must have been it. Seeing as she'd disappeared at a very convenient time, right around the time when she would have started gaining major weight, Josh was sure that he was onto something. The bitch. The fucking whore. He finished the beer, and then an entire third of the next one, before turning his attention back to the chick he was talking to.

"A lot smashed," he corrected her, and another giggle escaped his lips. Swaying slightly, the room seeming to blur for a moment, Josh registered in the back of his mind that he was about to commit himself to something he'd regret later. But his conscience was safely drowning in a flood of intoxication at the moment, so he didn't even consider the fact that other people from the school, people who wouldn't exactly approve of his cheating, could be here tonight. He only cared about getting into bed with the sexy chick seated beside him. And damn it, if he had his sights set on a girl, he'd get them eventually. He wasn't one for rape, but a little drugs never hurt anyone... or at least they didn't hurt him, considering he slipped them in the girl's drink, not his own. But there was no need for the pills tonight, because she looked willing enough just by the heels she was wearing. "Damn I hope you'll still be this fucking hot when I'm not drunk," he commented.

Josh chuckled approvingly when she assured him that she'd still be that hot when he wasn't totally smashed, and when she leaned forward and showed off her cleavage, he bought into that one instantly. Hell, anyone with assets like that had no way of being ugly unless they didn't take care of themselves, and he seemed to briefly remember that she hadn't looked a mess when he'd been sober, so her flawless appearance now might not be just a figment of imagination conjured up by the alcohol that was eating away at his brain. He really didn't give a damn that he was wrecking his liver and impairing his judgment by chugging the stuff like soda pop, it made him feel fucking wonderful inside, and he'd trade happiness for his sanity when pushed far enough. Depression was just a shit feeling that he hated and now it was all gone.

Another drunken giggle. "I'll try," he laughed, still swaying slightly, though now it was to the beat of some techno song in the background (The Medic... something, he'd remember the details when he wasn't impaired) which had started as soon as the dance floor had been opened. Trying to dance now, however, would be an impossibility for Josh, he'd probably trip over his own feet if he tried. He was hardly graceful with such an activity when he could pass a sobriety test! This thought made him laugh again. "I am so smashed," he told himself, and this made him laugh all the more. He didn't give a fucking rats ass how smashed he was! "So... you look familiar," he noticed. "But I can't-" he giggled, "- remember your... name?"

[He is absolutely HAMMERED XD - is dying of laughter -]

Now, in the morning Josh was probably going to justify his sexual feelings toward his girl as being too drunk to make good choices. But reality was, even sober he probably would have made the decision that he wanted to get into her pants. He just wasn't the right type for a committed relationship. Alexandra was pretty, and he felt for her, but lately he just couldn't convince himself to keep even his thoughts loyal. The guilt was also much easier to live with than you'd think. The girl across from him was nowhere near as intoxicated as he was, but hopefully that would change enough to make her willing to screw around. Actually... just looking at her Josh should have realized she'd probably fuck with anyone whether she was sober or not. But he was drunk, so he didn't think this.

Josh attempted to whistle at her suggestive words, but it was a minor failure that caused him to start laughing again, leaning on the counter for support so he didn't slip sideways off the bar stool. "I'm sure I will," he agreed after he'd managed to get his laughing under control. "M'names Josh, dunno if you already knew that," he said, laughing again. Everything was so damn funny when he was this hammered! This was why he got drunk. Because it made him so blissfully happy... and stupid, but he'd think about that in the morning.