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Post by LARK MARIE HARPER on Oct 2, 2012 16:49:18 GMT -5
& THE MISERY I KNOW LIKE A FRIEND THAT WON'T LET GO, IS CREEPING UP ON ME NOW ONCE AGAIN. SO I SING THIS SONG TONIGHT TO THE GHOST THAT WILL NOT DIE, AND SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO HAUNT ME 'TILL THE END. DO YOU FEEL THE SAME FOR WHAT ONCE REMAINED? YESTERDAY IS GONE, WE CAN'T GO BACK AGAIN. DO YOU EVER CRY - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR THE GHOST OF DAYS GONE BY?
There came a time in one's life when they realized how many wrong turns they had taken, how many times they said things they wished they could take back, how often they wanted to start over but couldn't. Stop the clock, rewind, and pray that no one noticed that things magically altered to the reality you felt was right. Obviously it was out of reach for anyone, no matter if they had the abilities to control an element or not. Having a power did not exactly make you a super hero. Oh, how she wished it did. The super hero always came out on top, not the other way around. Lark currently felt the weight of life pushing down on her shoulders; for a long while the world was right despite her father and she managed to overlook the past since it was no longer right in her face. She was with her best friend, her wonderful boyfriend, and her group of friends felt sturdier than ever. So why can't I shake it? That was what bothered Lark the most. The feeling that every negative occurrence in her life was out of her control. Was that why she enjoyed the freedom to choose her side, even though people would look down on her for it? Possibly. This instance, this particular chapter in her life was one that even Lark was not expecting. She tried to handle it on her own. The lone wolf was growing weary from traversing the steep mountainside alone. She needed someone to talk to.
The evening sun was not as warm as she wanted it to be. The weather was slowly starting to shift into something a bit colder, a bit less welcoming than the summer months she loved so dearly. Soon it would be winter and the snow would lay thick on the ground. She was not looking forward to feeling like a frozen humanscicle. Bunched up in a light hoodie, Lark kept her hands in the front pocket, fingers tight and wound up into white-knuckled fists. Her anger had been on the verge of overflowing for a few days now. She wanted to punch something, to vent the anger. Her knuckles were already bruised and aching from her past attempts. So far it had done nothing. They throbbed momentarily at the thought. At least the walks through the Hollow had created a little reprieve; keeping her body moving was an effective way to keep the energy from building up. Lark actually had a (last minute) destination in mind this time around though; Josh's mansion was just up the hill and she had every intention of going to see him. She should have called and let him know of her arrival in advance but being as she decided to make the visit about mid-way through her walk it did not really cross her mind that he might be busy. All she knew was that he was her best friend and she needed to talk. If he couldn't, then she would plan for another time. Either way the walk was helpful no matter where she went.
When Lark reached his doorstep she took a moment to collect herself before knocking on the door and stopping after the first knock. She flinched; damn, using her knuckles was probably not the wisest idea. Instead she reached over and rang the doorbell. Hopefully that was more audible. When the door opened she smiled half-heartedly at her best friend and shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "Yo," She greeted lamely, lifting a hand in a lazy wave. "You busy? I was taking a walk and thought I'd come by and see how you were. How things were going." It was a lie, even though she did care about Josh's well being and his happiness. Her expression did not reflect her inquiries. She looked tired. It was hard to hide the obvious strain from lack of sleep and stress. "If you've got something going on we can always catch up later though," Lark added as an afterthought. She hated this. It was not that she thought Josh could not handle listening to her issues; he had heard plenty of them before and had yet to walk away. She just wished she had the strength to carry all the weight on her own. I just wish Paula hadn't come back. Because the woman not only brought herself back to Canada, but another child that Lark did not know how to deal with. Her brother, Carter.
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Post by JOSHUA DONOVAN DALE on Oct 4, 2012 5:58:23 GMT -5
He scowled at his reflection in the mirror, bare-chested and scarred. Had it not been enough that he bore a permanent mark on his face, the palm of his hand, across his collarbone? Then there were the scars that tended to be less visible—the ones on his ribs, the line on his stomach, the faint scar on the side of his finger from where he'd drunkenly fumbled with his switchblade. No, that hadn't been enough. The new scar on his chest was shallow and a bright shade of reddish pink, more noticeable than most of the others. He knew that it was only because it was still healing, that it would get better over time. He was lucky that it hadn't needed stitches, or worse, that it hadn't killed him. That had been the aim of the unknown stranger, after all. He traced a finger along the length of it, ignoring the stinging pain that it produced. Almost subconsciously, he glanced toward the closed bathroom door. Closed and locked, for extra precaution. I don't feel safe here any more. He hated that most of all. The wound was not the worst of his worries. He was afraid that it was going to happen again, that one day he would wake up to find a stranger standing over his bed with a gun in hand, loaded and ready to pull the trigger. It was the gang all over again, except this time the nightmares features nameless, faceless individuals that had no motive, no regard for human life. He didn't like the feeling of fear. It was vulnerability. He had not told Nell how truly worried he was for he did not like to share knowledge of his weaknesses. With any luck—
He snapped his head sideways almost fast enough to give himself whiplash when the musical chime of the doorbell echoed through the house. His heart jumped as if he'd been shocked with electricityicty and he gripped the counter so hard that the veins stood out against his skin. "Fuck," he breathed, the sound of his own voice a small comfort. He was home alone, something that, in his mind, should not be frightening to a man in his twenties. He wasn't a child any more, he didn't hide from the monsters that lurked in the darkness. Monsters weren't real, everything was the same in the light as it was in the darkness. Except now there were different monsters chasing him, real monsters, monsters of the human variety. Fucking stop it, he chided himself. Do you really think they'd calmly ring the fucking doorbell? That would leave a fingerprint. Unless of course the person at the door was wearing—Stop. This time he took his own advice, feeling a bit shaky as he left the bathroom and pulled a clean shirt on from his wardrobe. His heart was hammering and he was glad for the security cameras, else he could never have approached the front door without the whole world outside knowing he was there. Damn fancy glass panes. Lark. He released a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding and went down to open the door, offering her a smile and covering up all signs of his panic. "Yo, Alouette," he greeted. "I wasn't expecting you, what's up?" Not that an unplanned visit was a bad thing! He hadn't been up to anything that special, anyway.
He didn't initially sense anything off about Lark's words, though his sharp eyes did not miss the fact that she looked tired. Drained. "As long as you promise not to fall asleep on me," he joked, trying to make light of the situation while simultaneously expressing his concern for her haggard appearance. "You look like you haven't slept in days. You all right?" Friends of Joshua's often asked after him when he didn't sleep before an important exam, there was a chance that it could be something simple, but he was worried nonetheless. She was his best friend. He shook his head. "I was just reading," he said, lying to her as much as she had been lying to him. Well, he had been reading, but he'd been unable to make himself comfortable and settle into the material when every small noise in the house made him jump out of his skin. One of the cats had nearly given him a heart attack when they'd jumped up onto the bed beside him. He was a wreck. Strangely he felt safer with the company of someone else and was more than happy to step back and to the side, gesturing into the lobby. "Come on in. Nell and Annabel are out, it'll be just us." Remembering that she'd asked after his well-being before he'd been distracted by how out of sorts she looked, he said, "I'm fine, by the way." Casual and a complete lie. "I'm a bit tired myself with planning a wedding and studying for classes and all that but what can you do?" He shrugged, appearing completely normal despite how on edge he felt. He prided himself on his ability to hide. "Oh, want anything?" It was polite to ask, after all, even if they had been friends for ages.
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Post by LARK MARIE HARPER on Oct 4, 2012 9:47:04 GMT -5
& THE MISERY I KNOW LIKE A FRIEND THAT WON'T LET GO, IS CREEPING UP ON ME NOW ONCE AGAIN. SO I SING THIS SONG TONIGHT TO THE GHOST THAT WILL NOT DIE, AND SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO HAUNT ME 'TILL THE END. DO YOU FEEL THE SAME FOR WHAT ONCE REMAINED? YESTERDAY IS GONE, WE CAN'T GO BACK AGAIN. DO YOU EVER CRY - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR THE GHOST OF DAYS GONE BY?
A part of her wanted to collapse into his arms, hug him tight, and pretend like the past week or two was just some horrible nightmare. Unfortunately she woke up every morning with the knowledge that it was real and the bitterness rose up once again. Then there was the fact that no matter what she did Paula would be there trying to reestablish the broken ties she made when she left. Josh's smile was comforting at least. Lark was completely unaware of how badly her initial presence had startled him. She knew nothing of what happened. "Yeah I considered calling but..." Lark shrugged a little, shoulders dropping low. "I figured if I was already out on a walk the extra mile or so wouldn't hurt too much in the turn around." Even if the chill was not exactly welcoming. She just had to find a way to shed the weight of her thoughts and emotions. It seemed like a productive way to do so.
Her smile was weak, chuckle a bit dry at his comment. "I can't make that promise, but I'll try." She might have initially made some sort of sarcastic retort, tried to keep the mood light, but she wasn't in the mood to try. Actually being here in Josh's house made her feel safe (despite what he felt currently) and there was a chance that being here would induce sleep. So long as she could avoid drooling all over him or his furniture then maybe it would not be a problem. "Define 'alright'," Lark said, the small smile fading away into a thoughtful frown. "And you'd be right on that one. I feel like I'm back on that sleeping pattern I had when my parents got divorced." All the drama and aftermath of Paula's leaving was enough to drive her mad. She lost of a lot of sleep and felt stressed to the max. This was not nearly as bad but the feeling that she could fall over at any moment felt quite similar. Her expression fluctuated a couple of times; was she disturbing his reading? Ugh, every time the feeling that she was burdening others reared its ugly head and Lark felt like turning around and leaving the man in peace. He's your best friend. Trust him. She held onto that as tight as humanly possible. When Josh stepped out of the way to let her in, Lark hesitated for a brief second before stepping inside and allowing the environment to calm her nerves. It was like drinking herbal tea or hot chocolate. Warm and inviting and...like home. Medicinal.
"Okay," She managed. Even if Nell and Annabel were here it would not change much. At least Nell was a friend. She did not trust her nearly as much as Josh but enough to where this conversation would not stop abruptly if she walked in the room.
Lost in her thoughts, his voice nearly startled her. At least they could hold a normal conversation with one another even though Lark just wanted to vent her frustrations and cry into his shoulder and be the mess that was bubbling up on the inside. She chuckled and nodded, brushing the hair behind her ear. Her hands hurt like a bitch. "Not much you can do. But I'm really excited about the wedding and everything. How's classes?" She inquired, tilting her head a bit to the side. Balancing everything had to have been a little stressful and Lark did not envy her friend in the least. At least he was happy. That was what mattered. That was most important. She waved her hand to dismiss his question. "No I'm fine. I just need to sit down for a bit. Gotta make sure I can make the walk back to school later." Without really waiting for him, Lark wandered into the living room and fell back on the couch with heavy sigh. How was she supposed to bring all of this up anyway? He had things to do and plan for and there she was bringing all of her problems to add to the pile. It really did feel like she was reliving the past. It was coming back to haunt her, to taunt and suffocate her like it had before. "I, ah..." Fuck. She hated this. Fingers met temples as she rubbed them in a gentle, circular motion. "Actually...I wanted to talk to you. If that's okay. It's not a huge deal or anything," She lied quickly to try and ensure that Josh didn't worry, though the attempt was probably fruitless by now. "But you're one of the very few people I trust."
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Post by JOSHUA DONOVAN DALE on Oct 10, 2012 13:50:23 GMT -5
He considered her, wondering why she'd talk a long walk up through the road they called 'mansion country' only to ask after his well-being. It seemed a little strange to him, honestly, but he shrugged it off in favour of different thoughts. Those thoughts were of the fears he wouldn't confess to her, not even to Nell, who knew about the initial incident. He told no one because his pride was as stubborn as a mule and he refused to admit weakness. So when he invited her inside, he made a casual effort of locking the door behind them as if he hadn't chanced a brief glance around the hedges and greenery around the porch, behind the fountain in the centre of the circular drive, for the same stranger that had tried to kill him quite close to where they were currently standing. He slid the extra latch across the door and brushed his palm lightly against the denim of his jeans to rid it of sweat. The house had once felt safe to him, always safe, his impregnable mansion with all it's security and the trappings of a rich life. Now it felt as safe as an open field faced with gunfire. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. His concerns shifted to Lark when she gave a strange reply. The smile he'd forced himself to wear also slipped away, though he did not frown so much as press his lips together and ponder the words. "The opposite of what you are, from what you're suggesting," he said. It was his turn to shrug. He wondered if she was going to tell him what was wrong. He didn't ask. Perhaps he would, but not yet. Prying made him uncomfortable. Gray eyes narrowed, though it was more a mixture of suspicion and curiosity rather than a mocking or rude gesture. "Guessing there's a reason for that, huh." It was more of a statement than a question and he made it obvious as always that he wasn't demanding an answer.
For a moment his smile returned with a genuine presence as he thought of the wedding, all of the preparing made him feel as giddy as a kid on Christmas. He had a lot more dignity than a squealing child as he spoke. "You and me both. It's not long now... fuck, I can hardly believe it sometimes, y'know?" Josh shook his head. He loved Nell more than anyone and he'd never doubted his decision for a moment but that didn't mean it was easy to wrap his mind around the fact that they'd be married in the next month. The excitement was there, thrumming like thousands of wings in his chest, and then he remembered the conversation and switched the gears in his mind to thoughts of classes and school work. "Class is class," he said. "They're definitely not easing up on the reins this time of year but I've got 'em handled. When do I not, eh?" He was the king of multitasking when he had to be, juggling his life with his partner with his school with anything else that might stand in his way, like an armed stranger or an unexpected friend at his doorstep. With how tired she looked, he brushed off his relaxed demeanour and raised his eyebrows when she mentioned another long walk. "I have a car with a full tank of gas and you look dead on your feet, L. Why don't you let me give you a ride, when you're ready to head back?" He gave her the choice, of course, but his words were firm and shot through with concern like bolts of lightning in his tone. He'd do anything for his friends, if given the chance, and Lark was one of those that had lasted the longest.
He hesitated as she moved off toward the living room, then cast another glance at the front door before following. The skin on the back of his neck crawled and he had an unsettling urge to whip round again but he chastised himself for being childish and stepped down the hallway into the living room after his best friend. It looked like a big deal as she spoke to him, insisting that it wasn't one even as he sat down and frowned disapprovingly at her. "You'd think after the first couple of times you'd have gotten to know me, huh?" The smile was brief and hard-edged but he was not angry at her. He was worried. "It's not the first time I've told you that you can talk to me whenever you like, Lark." She was like a sister to him, he trusted her more than he trusted his own family sometimes, save his soon-to-be-wife. He remembered Annabel selling him out to his parents as children, remembered his mother and father both going behind his back to whisper to one another, remembered Bryce in his entirety. He didn't trust the latter as far as he could throw him. "Well, at least I've got your trust." The smile was wry but not rude. He really did respect that she trusted him as much as he trusted her. "What did you want to talk about?" His brow furrowed. "I figured it was strange for you to just show up out of the blue to ask how I was doing." His look was knowing but Joshua was not offended. He knew she cared about his well-being even though it wasn't her reason for having come here. If he doubted how much she cared for him, how the hell could he place his trust in her as he had so many times before?
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Post by LARK MARIE HARPER on Oct 10, 2012 17:13:02 GMT -5
& THE MISERY I KNOW LIKE A FRIEND THAT WON'T LET GO, IS CREEPING UP ON ME NOW ONCE AGAIN. SO I SING THIS SONG TONIGHT TO THE GHOST THAT WILL NOT DIE, AND SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO HAUNT ME 'TILL THE END. DO YOU FEEL THE SAME FOR WHAT ONCE REMAINED? YESTERDAY IS GONE, WE CAN'T GO BACK AGAIN. DO YOU EVER CRY - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR THE GHOST OF DAYS GONE BY?
The suggestion was definitely meant to exist, it was not supposed to be entirely subtle or like some sort of difficult puzzle that took days to put together. There was a reason she was here. His well-being meant the world to her but at the same time her own meant something as well. Loyalty was a strong, ever present aspect of her personality but self-preservation coincided with it. After days of trying to sort through her emotions and thoughts Lark figured that there came a time when one needed to lean on another person for guidance and support. She was tired now. Too tired to carry the weight of this burden all by herself. There was strain on her face as she observed her friend, wondering where she needed to start. Normally there was no back story or prelude. She always found herself getting straight to the point. Lark did not miss the change in his expression and shrugged a little, her movements stiff with stress. "Yeah. I guess there is." Her voice felt so small and fragile as it passed her lips. Part of her did not even want to discuss this. She did not want it to exist. Unfortunately she was not so optimistic that she felt ignoring the issue would make this better. Closing her eyes and wishing it away only made her realize how real it was. You could only go so long in trying to be oblivious.
At least there was a small ray of sunshine amid the shadows that lurked in the corners of her mind. To see Josh smile as he did, the tone of his voice lifted her own spirits a small degree. She wanted what he had. Maybe in time she would. Her own heart felt light for a short time as he discussed the wedding. "Yeah, it's right around the corner. Soon you'll be a married man and you will have officially become old." The twinkle in her eyes betrayed the serious expression on her face. It felt like only yesterday they were just a couple of ridiculous kids trying to get through life. Throughout the turmoil Josh found something wonderful. Her happiness for him was insurmountable. This was her best friend, after all. There was a brief smile as he talked about class; the guy was smart as hell. She was smart to a degree but nothing like Josh. College would be different though; she was determined to make something of herself. "You've always got a handle on everything," Lark admitted quietly, though her tone was fond and full of admiration. "Well except when you're drunk. Then everything goes to fuck. But hey, who am I to judge on that one?" Their drunken escapades were as memorable as they could be. There were no regrets. Unlike Frank she did not turn her attempts at having a good time into trying to drown out her sorrows twenty-four seven. On occasion there was a need to wash the stress away but she preferred her guitar as an outlet instead.
Her expression dropped considerably, though a partial smile still remained. "I'd rather walk. Thanks, though." Being stubborn as ever, Lark did not want to depend on Josh more than she already had. He was here and did more than he probably knew so she would leave it at that. She was not aware of how anxious her friend felt about the house nowadays, and did not even look back to see him take glances at the front door. If only she knew. Maybe it was better to be ignorant? She sighed and could hardly bring herself to even find his face. "Yeah, I know." He might have been willing to listen but it was hard to bring herself to speak. "But you know that this isn't easy for me. You're one of the few that understand." A lot of the friends she had--Nell aside--seemed to be open books. They were willing to talk about their lives and all of the dirty little secrets that lay scattered about their closet. Ashton was the same. It was difficult to keep a fond smile from twitching briefly on her lips before fading again. "You'll always have my trust, Josh. You're my family. My kaikua'ana." Brother. That's how she always saw him, and would continue to see him. Unfortunately time was not kind and now she felt the pressure behind her eyes as she tried to figure out how to tell her non-blood brother about her real brother. "A girl can't come and ask after her best friend now? I see how it is." Her laugh was strained, almost painful before she sighed quietly and finally looked at him.
Subconsciously, Lark's fingers wound up tight, the pain in her knuckles resurfacing as the skin stretched with each movement. "My mom came back into the country," She started slowly, her words drawn out in order to try and keep her emotions level. "She found out where I worked and came to see me after hours. I tried to get her to leave but..." Her heart rate picked up, breath now audible as her shoulders pinched against her neck. Just discussing the woman made her feel ill. "She was persistent. Told me that she came back to try and repair things. Said that--" Now came the kicker. Her eyes were locked on a spot behind Josh's head in order to train her thoughts on something other than punching a pillow or bursting out in tears of anger. "That I needed to get to know my little brother."
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Post by JOSHUA DONOVAN DALE on Oct 10, 2012 18:08:08 GMT -5
Despite the fact that selfishness demanded he not abandon all his own concerns for hers, loyalty pulled him in another direction. He ended up somewhere in between, worried sick about his friend while still keeping his own fears in the back of his mind. So long as he was not under immediate threat, Lark was the more important of the two at this point in time. He blinked at her, his gray stare critical behind the mask of stoicism he always wore. He wouldn't ask but nor would he forget. If she did not plan on telling him then he would be keeping an eye on her from that point onward, trying to figure out of his own accord what was going on. That he gave his friends the respect and privacy they deserved could hardly be questioned but that did not mean he would not watch them like a hawk if he knew something was wrong. It went hand in hand with his protective nature. "So twenty-one is old now, is it? Seems stupid that the States only let the geezers drink, eh? Canada's a little kinder. Not much, though." He grinned. He did not consider himself as old and besides, Lark was only joking. "We're throwing a party after the honeymoon, too, so don't mind the decorations." He glanced around at the decorations that they'd already put up. "Will you be able to make it?" Much as he wasn't a fan of dressing up, he liked the idea of decorating the massive mansion and having fun with his family and friends. He already had a host of pranks running through his mind, some of which Annabel had helped him cook up. Having a Water in the family was a lot more beneficial than he'd have realised at the age of fourteen when he'd been as much a loyal Fire as the rest of them.
He was used to being praised by professors and his parents but the admiration of friends was a different matter entirely. That Lark was in awe of his intelligence and work ethic gave him a quiet sort of satisfaction. He might not have been full of himself but who didn't like having their ego stroked every now and again? His content expression shifted to one of mock offence and amusement as he shoved against her shoulder lightly and shook his head. "Speak for yourself! I always have a handle on things, you said it first." He wasn't serious, of course. He knew what he was like when intoxicated and he looked back on memories with a mixture of amusement and incredulity. "I vaguely remember the inside of a cop car being a part of sight-seeing in Vancouver..." He winked. He did remember that night, if only vaguely. He could recall a good portion of the festival and his memories got foggier from there. He remembered something about a fire, the sand, a laundromat, and of course the way the night had ended, but he couldn't work out the details. It was good for that ego of his that he couldn't remember his inability to read a sign. His lips pressed tighter. "Don't be an ass," he scoffed, his way of suggesting she stubborn. He didn't like the idea of Lark walking to school, it was incredibly far on foot all the way across the city and up the road, but he rolled his eyes and decided to relent before it ended up an argument. He had not let Lark in only to fight with her and she clearly had a different reason for being here as well. He was getting better with his temper, little by little.
He hadn't argued about her reluctance to speak, his only argument had been for his own willingness to listen. "You don't have to ask if it's all right with me. If you don't want to talk, that's fine. If you do, I'll always listen." He'd told her this before and so he left it at that. She was one of the rare people who understood how his views on privacy went. She also knew how good he was at keeping the secrets that he was told. He shared nearly everything with his bride-to-be but anything Lark told him would stay between the two of them. They were not his secrets or stories to tell. "Ditto, soeur cadette." Little sister, he called her, just as she called him brother in Hawaiian. The language barrier between them was not so much a barrier as something that they treated almost as an inside joke. They had their nicknames and their affectionate terms for one another that had stemmed from a long-term friendship. He noticed the strain as she laughed and it bothered him. He wanted to be able to wave his hand and take it all away but friendship did not work like that no matter how much he wanted it to. He wished that he could solve any problem that stepped in his path whether it was his or hers or anyone's he loved. "If that was all you wanted to know, you could have called. Like you said." His tone was serious in contrast to her joking, more grim than amused.
He missed nothing—from the way her fingers curled to the fact that she was looking past him instead of directly at him, his eyes missed nothing. The moment her mother came into the conversation his muscles tensed as an unexpected anger clawed at his chest. What does she want with her? In Joshua's mind, the fact that Paula had cheated and then ran off to Hawaii meant that she was unworthy to look at her daughter, let alone talk to her. He almost said something of the sort but held his tongue, listening with an expression frozen over, icy. "Repair things?" He could not help the outburst, the disgust. He nearly launched into a rant but once again found the self-control to shut his mouth and let her speak. Lark took a pause of her own, seemingly to collect herself. He could not have prepared himself for what came next and his eyes widened. "Brother?" Lark had always been an only child, one of the few that he knew, so the idea that she had siblings came as a definite shock to him. Then his expression once again went cold. The ice age settled over his features as the softness of shock gave way to a hardened bitterness. "Brother," he repeated, "or half brother?" He supposed it could be either but the fact that Paula had cheated on Frank and then fucked off to another country made him distrust her. He looked angry and uncertain, wanting to help Lark but not knowing what he could do for her. It was not a nice feeling by any means. "Do you know what you'll do?"
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Post by LARK MARIE HARPER on Oct 11, 2012 23:36:43 GMT -5
& THE MISERY I KNOW LIKE A FRIEND THAT WON'T LET GO, IS CREEPING UP ON ME NOW ONCE AGAIN. SO I SING THIS SONG TONIGHT TO THE GHOST THAT WILL NOT DIE, AND SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO HAUNT ME 'TILL THE END. DO YOU FEEL THE SAME FOR WHAT ONCE REMAINED? YESTERDAY IS GONE, WE CAN'T GO BACK AGAIN. DO YOU EVER CRY - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR THE GHOST OF DAYS GONE BY?
Though the words were meant to be in jest, a light teasing towards her best friend, Lark was not so sure if age was just a number or if it was how old you felt inside. Your maturity and the way you handle the situations life tosses at you. She certainly did not feel eighteen in her mind and silently wondered if Josh ever felt the same way at any point in time. That would be a deep philosophical discussion for another time she supposed. "It's insanely old, Josh. I think for your birthday next year I'm going to get you a cane." And then he could ward the children off of his front yard more effectively. No one liked an old man waggling his cane at them. She inwardly chuckled at the sexual innuendo that could have created had she said it aloud. "I have to admit that the age for drinking in the U.S. is ridiculous though. It's nice to be legal." If she had pulled the stunt in Vancouver somewhere in the states, there would have been a pretty big slap on the wrist. Trespassing and underage drinking? Not a wise combination. Lark stopped her thoughts and considered his question now, expression distant as she sorted out her work schedule and school. "I guess it depends," She said finally, deciding that right now there would be no definite answer. "Sometimes my work schedule changes up during the week. But I could take off if I'm working that day." This was her best friend. She would do that for him.
That trip to Vancouver--drunkenness aside--was fun and a wonderful way to spend a birthday. She smiled fondly and though it did not quite reach her eyes, it was genuine. "Only when you're sober. You just think you have a handle on things when you're drunk." Lark was teasing, poking fun because she knew that her common sense was out the window when alcohol came into the picture. "...y'know, I remember some of that too. It was fun! We'll have to do it again sometime." She stopped and corrected herself with, "Well, not the cop car thing. The whole vacation thing." Her hands made a circular motion to signify everything. Any time spent with Josh was a good time though; they did not need to go anywhere to have fun and be buddies. She liked that she could have that with him. It made her feel like she was a part of something special, something she felt was unattainable with her own family. Thank you. It was forever a broken record in Lark's head. Her lips dipped into a frown but said nothing. There was no sense in explaining it to him. She hated trying to rectify herself to someone even if they were a best friend. Lark felt her reasons were solid and that was good enough for her. Instead she let that moment pass on. She nodded. "It's nice to know I have you as a soundboard, at least." Josh had always been there. She could talk to Ashton--and did, quite often about a lot of things--but Josh had just as much priority as he did. There were years of friendship between them.
And just as Lark considered him a brother, he considered her a sister. Family. Something she missed and craved even though she never spoke of the desire aloud. Josh might have understood but because she never fully expressed it to him either the understanding might not be as deep. There was a glow of admiration and affection in her eyes before it faded away again. Josh did not seem as intent on keeping the situation light. Her chest felt so tight and weighted down. Instead of giving a verbal response she made a weary groan and dipped her chin to her neck. It was hard to tell him what happened, to keep from growing angry and going silent. It was the only way she felt she could cope with herself when the fury rose up in her chest but it was not easy to contain. The laugh in her throat was dry and cut. "Yeah. I'm not sure what the fuck she thought she would get from me. There is no repairing anything anymore." Paula severed the ties and Lark was not intent on pushing aside her bitterness and hatred to try and solder it back together. Her brother was an issue though. He was innocent. A part of her knew that and yet...Lark gripped her knee tight. "Half brother." That's where the hatred came in. The fact that his blood was tinged with that of the man Paula cheated on Frank with. Unforgivable. Her lip twitched. Finally, Lark shifted her fixated gaze on her best friend and looked a mixture of furious and lost. "I...don't know what to do. I don't know what to feel. To say, if I say anything at all." Lark's voice was distant. She ran a hand through her hair. "I want to hate him, but I know that it isn't fair to hate a two-year old for something Paula did." The woman did not even deserve the label of 'mom' anymore.
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Post by JOSHUA DONOVAN DALE on Oct 15, 2012 2:15:56 GMT -5
He pressed his lips together and raised an eyebrow at her, then said without hesitation, "Do that, and that cane will be what puts you underground." He gestured at the ground and added, "I might be older than you but I can bet you'll die first. Or I can make it happen." He spoke with the firmness of fact and didn't break character once throughout the mock death threat. He was anxious and his stomach was all in knots about the recent attack but his humour had not taken a serious hit because of it. In fact, joking around helped him to feel relaxed and in charge of a situation. If he could keep a hold on his laughter and facial expressions, it made him feel as if there was still a part of his life that was under his control. He did not relax after the joke but instead continued on with the conversation as if the threat had never happened. Such was common in conversation with Joshua. "Not like I've drank since before I hit high school or anything..." A smirk tugged briefly at his lips before he slipped once more into neutrality. The gang had introduced him to a lot of activities that a young kid shouldn't have been participating in and drinking had been one of them. They'd also tried to get him into drugs and smoking but he'd thankfully managed to avoid those. He nodded at her words, recalling when he'd had a job and a schedule to work around. He had school and studying but it was nothing unpredictable. "If it's too much of a risk, I wouldn't ask you to do that," he said as a precaution. He didn't want her getting in trouble at work because of him. ".. but it would be nice to have some familiar faces around." They were opening their house to the whole of the city, whoever happened to turn up, and as a suspicious person he figured it would benefit him to have more than strangers about.
As a proud person who valued his self-control, Josh didn't like to admit how ridiculous he could get when he was intoxicated. It was never enough to instil common sense and make him cut alcohol out completely but it was enough to make him uncomfortable. "Hey, at least I don't drink and drive. Now that would be stupid." He laughed and made to pass it off as nothing. His pride was a fickle thing that could be affected by the smallest of comments by the closest of friends. Logic told him that everyone acted like a fool when they were inebriated but pride insisted that he should set himself apart. Why admit a weakness? He raised an eyebrow, then chuckled when his friend corrected herself. "I was going to say..." He wasn't a fan of the authorities but the cops hadn't been completely cruel to them. They hadn't been fined or anything like that, more of a slap on the wrist than anything else. The hangover he'd dealt with in the morning had been a much worse punishment for their drunken revelry. "But I agree. The vacation was great." He'd uploaded all the pictures and video he'd taken during the festival. He wasn't big on social media but he did share some experiences with his friends. "Course," was all he said. Nothing else needed to be said, in his opinion. She'd had his support for a long time and it wasn't going to change any time soon.
He tried to stay out of family matters as much as he could. Josh knew from his own experiences that blood was incredibly thick and that many misgivings could be forgiven for the sake of relation alone. He'd allowed his father to get away with more things than a lot of people would even attempt with someone as vengeful and volatile as Joshua. He didn't insult the family of his friends for fear that they would turn on him in the end. Lark's family? He did not feel as many boundaries there. His gray eyes flashed with anger at the thought of Paula and what she had done to her family. Cheating whore. Censoring himself for wariness, he said, "She doesn't deserve so much as a second chance." He might not have hesitated to express his opinion but he softened it just in case. He listened to her speak and then dipped his head. "You're right," he said. "It's not fair. Your... brother didn't do anything to harm you. It's your mother you should be angry at." His tone was not scolding or condescending. He'd never been through anything like what she was experiencing but he was trying to view it objectively. "But I can understand why you'd be bitter." He didn't want her to think he was chastising her. They were friends, he was not one to order her around. "I'm not suggesting that you get to know him. You'll need to make that decision on your own. But no one should be hated simply for being born. It was out of his control." He could only imagine what it would be like to grow up being loathed for reasons you couldn't have prevented. He paused, then asked softly, "What's his name?"
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Post by LARK MARIE HARPER on Oct 17, 2012 12:19:09 GMT -5
& THE MISERY I KNOW LIKE A FRIEND THAT WON'T LET GO, IS CREEPING UP ON ME NOW ONCE AGAIN. SO I SING THIS SONG TONIGHT TO THE GHOST THAT WILL NOT DIE, AND SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO HAUNT ME 'TILL THE END. DO YOU FEEL THE SAME FOR WHAT ONCE REMAINED? YESTERDAY IS GONE, WE CAN'T GO BACK AGAIN. DO YOU EVER CRY - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR THE GHOST OF DAYS GONE BY?
Lark lifted her chin and appeared defiant despite knowing full well that she did not take this conversation seriously in the least. A death threat from her best friend was the last thing she would consider to be real. She snorted. "Go on ahead, Dale," Lark challenged, opening her hand to him as though offering the invitation to kick her ass. "I'd like to see you try. I'll beat you down before you can even blink." There was power behind her fist; she had the capability to fight, but that did not mean she went around choosing battles that were bound to end in her losing. Josh was far too strong physically and elementally. She smirked at him and rolled her shoulders when he suggested that he had spent quite a few years building up his tolerance to alcohol since before hitting the legal age. Lark's experience with alcohol had not been as lengthy but there was definitely plenty of underage drinking to be had on her part. She shook her head and waved him off lightly. "No risk. It's just one day. If they pitch a bitch fit over it then obviously they've got some shit to work out." Being on time, doing the job right, and doing it with a smile on your face was always a speedy way to place you in the good graces of the manager. She felt that her boss would be okay with her asking off this once. "I'll ask Ash if he wants to tag along. He loves Halloween and dressing up so he'll probably be interested." It all depended on what his family was doing, she supposed, but it could not hurt to ask.
She laughed a little and nodded, agreeing with him. "Very true. I would never ride with you in a car ever again." The level of trust Lark felt towards Josh was quite immense but if he lost his sense of logic and decided to drive while drunk she would be sure and avoid any car rides in the future. She relived the vacation in her head and merely wore a content smile as he spoke, adding a bit of a chuckle. Being in the back of a cop car in an unfamiliar city was a bit terrifying, especially when you were not sober enough to fully comprehend that they were more or less trying to help. These out of town trips were not very frequent and Lark cherished them. Going to Hawaii was certainly on the list but that was a slightly more expensive venture and decided to wait until next year. Summer break would be an opportune time to go, she thought. It helped that Paula was no longer in Hawaii, but of course her lack of presence there meant that she was here and Lark was not quite sure if a mother-free vacation was worth what was going on now. This seemed more permanent. Paula did not seem intent on going anywhere. Lark felt her mouth go dry as she tried to laugh, the sound forced and hoarse. "Neither of my parents deserve a second chance," She pointed out, keeping her gaze steady on the wall. "If I could ship them both off I would in a heartbeat." And then they could leave her alone and life could progress without feeling as though there was a weight tied to her feet.
Although Lark wanted to hate her brother, hate everyone in her immediate family for bringing about so much drama and pain, she knew that it was wrong to loathe a child. Josh agreed and, had he chastised her or scolded her for the bitterness that waged war in her heart, she would have stormed off in a rage. But he did not talk down to her and so instead the scowl she wore was merely a reflection of how she felt towards the situation. I hate feeling like I have no control. She was silent for a minute or two before finally trying to respond. "I am angry at her. I hate her." That probably went unsaid but she wanted Josh to understand that her anger was aimed towards Paula more than anyone else at the moment. She sighed, her breath heavy and weary. "I just don't like that she decided to come back around after two years, then sprung that news on me like I was supposed to be happy about it, and then expect me to accept everything with open arms and act like none of it was wrong." Her eyes searched Josh's, not looking for anything in particular but merely reassuring herself that she was not in this alone. And no matter how much Lark wanted to ignore what he had to say about Carter she knew that he was right. She even said so herself. It was not a crime to be born. To exist. "None of this should have even happened in the first place. It's all fucked up." She mumbled, pushing the hair out of her face and tucking it neatly behind her ear. The relationship with her parents had never been above par or perfect but it was certainly better than this. Oh well; dwelling on what could have been was foolish. Lark looked at her lap now, watching her fingers intertwine. "Carter. I haven't seen him yet...and I don't know if I should. Would it do any good?" She glanced up at her friend again, this time actually looking for an answer. Some advice. Anything. Hating Carter was not justified but was it wise to invest herself in a relationship with the boy when the ties with her mother were still severed?
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Post by JOSHUA DONOVAN DALE on Oct 18, 2012 18:13:49 GMT -5
Joshua was content to merely chuckle at her insistence that she could beat him down, knowing that if they weren't joking around he could prove her wrong in an instant. At the same time he also knew that he would never attack his best friend unless she did something to seriously wrong him. He got into fights with his loved ones often enough thanks to his volatile temper but physical violence was something he saved for his enemies alone. He nodded, not all too surprised by the answer but still comforted by it. "For all I knew your boss could have hated you, I don't know," he explained. He remembered working at the tattoo parlour, remembered how much his boss had hated him. And he'd been able to hold that hatred over Joshua's head, reminding him that he was working illegally and under-the-table for the sake of higher wages and treating him like shit all the while. It made him cautious of anyone who held the title of 'boss', though he'd certainly seen the brighter side of the workplace when he'd worked at the hospital, the retirement home, the medical wing in the Academy. "Good idea. He's welcome to it, everyone is really." He'd come a long way from the paranoid man who wouldn't have allowed anyone but his closest of close friends anywhere near his doorstep. He had a lot of people to thank for that, family and friends both. He still refused to babble about his life and his past but he was learning that it was all right to trust people every once and a while, to give them a chance that he would otherwise have held back.
A dry smile lacking positive emotion tugged at his lips. Was it wrong to agree with her, should he stay out of it? He didn't think that her parents deserved a second chance, either. He didn't think that they deserved to so much as look at her for what they'd done. He did not reflect on the fact that his friends might view his parents in the same way if they knew all of the things that Donovan had done over the years. He thought only of Frank and Paula, of how much he resented him for watching how their actions had affected his best friend. "I know," was all he said in the end, words quiet. He did not voice his own venom. Self-restraint grew ever-kinder over the years. "Your father didn't have anything to do with this, though." He said it not to point out the obvious but to explain why he had not included Frank in the equation. He put a comforting hand on Lark's shoulder when she expressed her hatred for her mother, wishing he could do more than be supportive. It was a fruitless hope, of course, so he did not focus too strongly on it. "It was wrong," he said, then amended, "It is wrong." He didn't condone cheating on any level, especially not when he'd seen how it had wrecked Lark's home life. Thinking about being unfaithful was one thing—even Joshua wasn't completely innocent there—but actually acting upon the thought was another. And the fact that a child had been born of the crime was even worse.
He couldn't argue with her then, did not want to argue. It seemed as if they were on the same page in terms of her mother and brother and this relieved him. He would not want to get into a fight with his friend at such a crucial moment. Carter was the boy's name, she told him. He wondered what the kid looked like, if there would be anything of her mother in the boy at all or whether he would be the spitting image of the man that Paula had cheated with. He figured the latter would make it all the more difficult for Lark to accept him. He imagined for a moment how he would feel to discover that Patricia was cheating on his father and there was an uncomfortable anger that bubbled in his chest. Would he want to know his half-sibling, even if he didn't blame the kid for what had transpired? I... don't know, he realised. He'd never been faced with the situation. Everyone is different. He had a pang of sympathy for what Lark must be going through. "I don't know," he told her honestly. "You don't have to, of course. No one could blame you if you took nothing to do with him, whether you hated him or not." Relation didn't count for everything. He thought of Bryce, his blood brother, and knew that he would have no issue renouncing all relation with him at the drop of a hat. "But... you'll probably want to make your decision before he's too old to understand what's going on," he suggested after a careful pause. "If you want to be his sister, I think it's best to start off on the right foot. And if not, I'd... I'd stay away, I think. Don't want to confuse the poor kid, y'know?" He was no longer a baby, he would be able to recognise faces and in a few more years he would start to understand.
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Post by LARK MARIE HARPER on Oct 19, 2012 17:44:34 GMT -5
& THE MISERY I KNOW LIKE A FRIEND THAT WON'T LET GO, IS CREEPING UP ON ME NOW ONCE AGAIN. SO I SING THIS SONG TONIGHT TO THE GHOST THAT WILL NOT DIE, AND SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO HAUNT ME 'TILL THE END. DO YOU FEEL THE SAME FOR WHAT ONCE REMAINED? YESTERDAY IS GONE, WE CAN'T GO BACK AGAIN. DO YOU EVER CRY - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
FOR THE GHOST OF DAYS GONE BY?
She laughed a little and shook her head, her smile tired but present none the less. "If I hated him you'd know. You know me. I'm not really good at hiding my dislike for people." If her manager had wronged her in some way then Josh would probably be witness to a scowl and a couple of choice names. The guy was decent and knew how to run the store, not to mention he allowed her a flexible schedule and allowed her to set up her own guitar lesson times as well. What better way to enjoy your love of music? Lark clasped her hands together a little when Josh approved of her bringing Ashton along to the party. She figured it would not be a big deal but it was his house. If he wanted to bounce asses out of the mansion he could, which she would find extremely hilarious. "Good. I think he'll have fun." Having everyone she knew and enjoyed being around were going to wind up at the party, which was nice. A fleeting thought did cross her mind though; did Paula know where her friends lived? If the woman managed to find her at work without Lark having given her the location or the name, what about Josh's home? Ashton's? Pacey's? The thought truly shook her to her core. It was unnerving.
At least her best friend agreed with her. Having him on her side was reassuring and the hatred she felt towards her family felt justified. Of course, even if Lark were alone in her corner she would still come to resent Frank and Paula for everything they had done over the past couple of years. Josh's voice was soft and her lips twitched a very small, brief smile. It was pained and albeit a bit bitter. "He still fucked up my life, Josh. Whether or not it was his fault in the beginning, he fucked up." Frank did not have to resort to drinking, or neglecting his daughter, or beating her because he no longer had control over himself anymore. The man was an adult and should have known that with every action there were consequences and the results of his drinking should have been more than obvious. She placed her hand on top of his and gave it a small squeeze of appreciation before allowing it to slip away and back into her lap. His presence was soothing. "I wonder if it'll ever be considered okay," Lark wondered aloud, voice distant and thoughtful as she spoke. They said time could heal most everything, but did it really? Or did the bitterness just stop boiling over after a while? Like turning the switch to simmer. Life offered new distractions as it pushed on, leaving little time to dwell on the past. Maybe that's what they meant by healing, but for Lark she was not sure if it would be enough.
Just as Josh was dwelling on what Carter looked like, Lark was doing the same. Who would he resemble more, and would she be able to cope if she did decide to meet the boy and came face to face with a child who looked nothing like Paula, but instead like the man she slept with? The questions bounced back and forth, making her chest tighten with anxiety. She did not like this uncertainty. No one could blame her, Josh was right, but would she be able to live with the thought that she never saw her half-brother? "Yeah I know." She said aloud to portray her agreement with him. His next statement did cause the wheels to turn a bit more, her brain running a thousand miles a minute. "Yeah..." Her voice was quiet as she trailed off and let him finish what he was saying, partially hating that he was speaking the truth. Waiting around would only make things worse. As Carter grew older he would be able to understand what was going on and Lark did not want to toss him around. She had a lot to think about. A big decision to make. Either one would have a large impact on Carter's future, and her own. I don't know if I can be bitter for the rest of my life. She already hated Paula and Frank. She hated Brett. That was a lot of bitter feelings to cope with. "I guess...I'll sleep on it and figure out what I need to do tomorrow," Lark said at last, pulling at her hair and tucking it behind her ear repetitively. The night was going to be rough. She leaned against Josh and gave him a hug. "Do you..mind if I stay here tonight? If not it's okay but I think the walk took more out of me than I realized. And I really don't want to be at my dorm right now." Sitting down allowed the weariness to catch up with her and now her legs felt like Jell-O.
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Post by JOSHUA DONOVAN DALE on Oct 19, 2012 19:44:21 GMT -5
His lip twitched as a faint sign of amusement, though it was the only visible expression of it. Fire elementals did indeed tend to allow their dislike of others to become evident quite quickly. Joshua himself was a slight exception—it all depended on the situation. He hadn't told anyone about his boss at the tattoo parlour because he'd been paranoid, afraid that someone would find out that he was too young and unlicensed and that they would get the authorities involved. It wasn't like he'd done much beyond helping keep the place sterile and tidy as well as knowing how to work with piercings but it was still something that could have gotten him into a load of trouble at the time. He often forgot to take into account that his way of looking at things didn't always apply to others. He didn't point this out to Lark, merely said, "True enough." He nodded when she spoke of Ashton, not knowing the Earth elemental too well himself but knowing enough of him thanks to their mutual friends. They'd spoken on occasion, hung out once or twice, enough that Josh trusted him not to cause trouble at the party. "You'll have fun, too, I bet. Nell and I have a lot of shit planned." There was a glitter of mischief in his gray eyes but he gave nothing away. Wouldn't want to ruin all of their fun, would he? He was excited to finally see someone put Nell's maze to the test other than himself—he loved solving puzzles and so he found it fun to do a walk through each time she changed it up but this time he had a different plant.
He felt that tell-tale burst of defiance and anger and his lips pressed tightly together as he fought against an outburst. The quick temper of a Fire elemental was his curse, even when the person he spoke to was friend or family. "Did I argue that? No." She hadn't tried to accuse him of being insensitive, hadn't said it in a certain way that incensed him—no, it was the words themselves that had set him off. Like I didn't know that. He'd never argued that her father had fucked up her life, the only reason he hadn't mentioned Frank was that he had nothing to do with the subject at hand. He hated Frank, arguably as much as Lark did thanks to how fiercely protective he was over his friends, but he was not someone that dragged unnecessary things into conversation if he could avoid it. He did not flip out on her as he would have when he was much younger, he did not say anything else, he merely allowed the stiffly spoken words to stand. He didn't apologise. Perhaps the situation should have called for something more gentle and sensitive but anger did not make pardons very often. Temper problems were not selective things and anyone who believed as such did not have anger issues of their own. "No," he said, voicing his opinion. "It'll never be right, what she did, but your opinions might change." He could not say. He did not know how time would affect her. Time had its hold over them all. He was different now than he'd been even a year ago. It was both a scary and a comforting thought.
As they both stood thinking about her little brother, Joshua also wondered after the man who Paula had cheated with. Had he known that he was sleeping with a married woman? If he had knowingly fucked up the Harper family then he was as much to blame as the wretched woman herself but what if he'd been caught unawares? Was he around or did Paula raise Carter on her own until this point? There were a lot of questions. He almost wanted to ask Lark, to see if she knew, but there were wounds hidden behind those questions that he did not want to cut open. He dipped his head when she suggested sleeping on it, affirming that it was probably a good idea. "Of course," he said without hesitation when she asked if she could stay the night. He would never turn down a friend in need, especially not when that friend was Lark. It helped that his fiancée and sister knew Lark, as well, so he didn't have to tread carefully or ask for other permissions. "You're always welcome here." She always had been and always would be, provided she didn't somehow fuck up their friendship. He didn't see any plausible way for that to happen. They'd been friends for years, longer than most of the people he knew, he planned for that friendship to stay for good. "Come on, let's go find something to get up to." They had the house to themselves for now and maybe they could find something to take her mind off the troubles, even if for a little while.
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