I CAN DO ANYTHING WITH NO PERMISSION , (nell)

Nell believed her life as of late could be comparable to an episode of Scooby Doo. It started with the arrival of Jane and the imagined clap of thunder and branches of lightning around her fahter’s mansion when she saw her. Now it had become a routine to go out to dinner and talk with her father and Jane, all the while trying to uncover the mystery that is her aunt while volleying underhanded insults that León either ignored or was oblivious to. And there was the fact that Jane wanted to speak to her alone so that they could banter without filters due to the lack of the man’s presence. Or as she said, the interesting and enticing conversations Sinclair women loved. All she needed was a sidekick dog and a psychedelic van and she could go around solving mysteries. She cradled the phone between her ear and shoulder as she walked out of the school. ”No, I’m not dealing with her tonight,” she said to her father on the other end. ”’Dealing’?” the man asked and she quickly rebutted, ”Yes, dealing. She’s a nightmare, papa.” His voice was stern with the next words.

She made her way across the grounds, and waved at a group of friends who were calling her over, then pointed to the phone hidden beneath strands of hair. ”You are the one who wanted us to stop planning things behind your back, Nell.” Well, that came round to bite her in the ass, didn’t it? Actually, everything did. With a light sigh, she took out Doritos from her messenger bag, and her father must have heard the crunch. ”Are you eating?” he asked in what sounded like a disbelieving tone, though her with food at hand should not be the least bit surprising. ”I ‘an eat and 'alk at the same time,” she said, speaking around the chips. There wasn’t even a sigh on the other line, even though she knew that he was probably exasperated with her. It was funny how even after all this time, there was a sort of paternal connection that enabled her to understand him in certain ways or predict his actions.

”Since you are busy with your food, I will let you go,” he said, and before hanging up he added, ”And you’re coming over for dinner tonight.” The line went dead before she could get on him about ordering her to do something. He can’t order her around, he was not her father and could not lecture her like one. But even that didn’t rile her up as it once would have. No, her mind was more focused on Jane and what exactly the woman was cooking up in her head. The worst part is realizing that all of this was a secret—it became apparent when she had these thoughts on her mind as she stopped to chat with some friends. “I’m a murderer,” she could say if she wished to speak the truth. “And my aunt’s a manipulative bitch. How’s your life?”

However, there was one person she could have told this to, and his name was Josh. That is, if she could get a hold of him. He’d been elusive as big foot, and at first she’d believed that it had been because he was busy. School had just started up and there was a lot of work for everyone. But he was bust a lot more than usual, and she had barely spoken to him in weeks. And when she went to his house, she’d be curtly informed by his father that he wasn’t home. It seemed everyone was acting strange. Or maybe it was just her and her paranoia. As if she didn’t have enough fear in her life, she had to have Jane pop in and flounce around Canada and add an extra helping of anxiety. But no, she was sure that Josh was avoiding her and the only explanation she could conclude to was that she had done something wrong. She often went over the last conversations she had with him in her head before he started snubbing her, trying to remember if she’d told him something that may have made him act so shifty.

Thinking that she’d need to add Josh to her list of Scooby Doo cases for the gang, she saw him in the parking lot next to his Aventador. The car that had been parked even over the weekends, which she thought was odd. You’re not avoiding me, mister, there aren’t any hallways to change direction in. Taking her hand out of the bag, she waved as she walked over to him. ”Hey Josh,” she said, and then hesitated a bit. It wasn’t that she was at a loss for what to say—there were a lot of things she wanted to say to him. “Where the hell have you been? I know you’ve been avoiding me. Let’s talk it out, mano-a-mano.” Instead, she took the devious approach and asked with a breezy tone, ”Where’ve you been lately? I haven’t talked to you in a while. I’ve missed you.” Translation: “I noticed what you’ve been doing”. And she was worried and freaking out just a little bit. She was already frayed at the edges thanks to stress, and now that her boyfriend was acting so oddly, it just worsened it. I don’t think I said anything, I’m pretty sure. Holding out the bag, she offered, ”Chips? Cool ranch.” Translation: “Just talk to me, dammit.” Maybe the best route to take wasn’t to use devious tactics, but she wasn’t going to outright state that she noticed him avoiding her. That felt rather awkward.

Nell was already anxious upon seeing Josh, and though it should have reassured her, the smile that found its way onto his face just made her feel worse. Why are you smiling at me? Even when he was happy, he usually didn’t smile. It just wasn’t something Josh did. Which is why her stomach only twisted into more knots like the panic was a boy scout in her gut. I definitely did something. Why else would he be acting so flighty and strange and suspicious? And the creeping sense of anxiety only worsened. She wasn’t stupid, she could tell something was up. She knew Josh, much better than a while go when everything he did was shrouded in mystery. ”Yeah, I get it,” she still said, her smile not quite crinkling her eyes like it usually did because she was focused on the pessimistic thoughts in her head. Still, she prattled, ”School is killer getting back into the swing of things.” This is inane, Nell, grow a pair! But she felt uncomfortable. What would she say? If it turned out that she was just being paranoid, then she’d just look like an idiot. The last time she assumed something, she’d been terribly, terribly wrong. But this was different. Josh usually didn’t avoid her like he was doing now, and she could tell it was on purpose. She shook her head a bit, and said, ”I could help you out, you know.” Nell fell silent after that, not knowin where to go from there. She just wanted to talk to him, and now clipped conversations, either. Actually sit down and speak to him. Because she sure as hell didn’t have the chance to, as of late.

He politely denied the offer, and she held the bag against her chest. There was a pause as she tried to think of something else to say, when abruptly he jolted and asked the conversation to be cut short. Nell liked to be an honest person, probably because she wasn’t a very good liar. So she decided to be straightforward instead of trying to dance around th esubject. As much as he was pretending there wasn’t anything going on, she knew there was. And she needed to stop him from getting in that car and leaving, so she just said the first thing that came to mind. ”Did I do something…wrong?” She spoke the words plainly and unfiltered, and once it was out she couldn’t take it back. That could really be the only explanation. She looked at him with large inquiring eyes, as if ready to absorb whatever he told her next. After biting her lip for a moment, she said softly, ”It feels like you’ve been avoiding me.” Nell certainly did not like to dance around subjects, and she was going to tell him what was on her mind now. Because if she let him go, she knew there would be no call later. He hadn’t tried to get in touch with her, it was her that has been trying to get a hold of him. For a moment, Nell wanted to chicken out and add on, “But I’m just being paranoid.” She refused. It wasn’t just paranoia, and she decided to trust her gut instinct on this, even though doing that was more of a coin flip than anything.

Not at all surprised that he turned her down—she knew that he was lying in a sense and she’d only just wanted some way to talk to him—and it made her feel a bit worse. Josh obviously didn’t want to be around her, she didn’t know why she was trying. Because I love him. Yeah, that was a good reason. But she just nodded and accepted it, darting her eyes to the side for a moment so she could think before he gave his rather hesitant reply. Nell bristled a bit when he said that it was not her fault—not exactly. The additonal words bolstered her suspicions that she’d said or done something to make him like this. She’d certainly done something, but what? No matter how many times she wracked her brain for explanations, she just couldn’t understand. ”Then what is it?” she asked, shaking her head. ”And what do you mean by ‘not exactly’?” Her voice was punched with concern. By this point, she just wanted to understand what the heck was going on. Josh openly admitted that he was avoiding her, and she just wanted to know why so she could fix it. He insinuated that it was in some way her fault, so why didn’t he just tell her what she did wrong? Or maybe it wasn’t fixable. It was hard to determine when she didn’t even know what it was she did that had made him avoid her. Or maybe she just knew this would happen. She always wondered why he put up with her, ever since she told him to dispose of her phone in the strangest way and because she was acting so shiftily. Everyone you love will leave you. But she didn’t want to accept that as a part of her life.

Nell was just waiting for more excuses, she had a feeling that these elusive answers were coming. She couldn’t expect more, not with his behavior lately, behavior that was just adding onto her distress. During a time when the person who hated you most in the world was paying you a visit, it would be nice to have the person you trusted most in the world for support. She wouldn’t complain to him, oh god no, but having his presence would be enough. But it was just impossible to get a hold of him, he was just like water through her fingers. She sighed, and said, ”Why don’t you start by telling me what’s up?” Nell didn’t sound angry, because she wasn’t. She didn’t undestand enough to be angry, and she didn’t want a repeat of the last time she’d gotten so mad. ”I’d really appreciate having a straight answer instead of playing guessing games.” Her voice carried the anxiety she was feeling, and she really didn’t want it to. But it was very perturbing having your boyfriend pretty much ignore you for weeks. And she really didn’t want to consider the fact that he might want to end it between them. Josh would tell me, right? If she’d done something that made him want to break up with her, he’d confront her about it. She knew that she wasn’t good with this whole relationship deal and even after months she still didn’t know…well, anything. Josh would definitely help if he could just give her a straight answer instead of trying to run away. Feeling that her last words may have been taken a bit harshly, she said, ”I just want to know why.” She shoved her hand in her pocket to give all appearances of being nonchalant when in fact she felt like panicking. It was just a human defense mechanism—pretend like nothing’s bothering you.

Now that she was on the receiving end on the phrase, she realized how disconcerting it was. He had a fullproof way of not getting her to push past that. What could she say to it? ”Okay,” is what she settled for, spoken slowly as if still trying to comprehend what he’d said. Why did those two words have to be so perfect for avoiding further questions? When he expresssed his wishes for a straight answer, she just grew confused. ”Why can’t you?” she asked. Really, what was stopping him? He was really just making her even more anxious, and she shifted her weight from foot to foot. What was really going on here? All she knew that it was somehow—in some way—her fault and Josh just wouldn’t tell her. Why aren’t you just being straight with me? Even if it was something bad, she’d rather hear it then being fed half-assed responses to everything she asked. ”Nevermind,” she said, amending the words. ”It’s complicated.” Though that may have come off as bitter, it really was just her acknowledging that it must have been hard for him. Right? That’s why he wasn’t telling her? She didn’t know because he wouldn’t tell her.

She was a bit surprised when he relented. Blinking a few times in the time before she answered she repeated, ”All right?” She was expecting the explanation right then, but apparently Josh didn’t want to talk about it in a parking lot. Understand. No, not understandable because I don’t understand what’s going on here. ”That’s fine,” she said acquiescently. Nell didn’t care where they talked, she just wanted to talk. Now that he was willing—well, still seemingly reluctant—it would be easier. ”Yeah, sure.” Ace moved out earlier in the month, so now she didn’t have to worry about him getting involved with whatever Josh was going to tell her. Is he going to break up with me? She couldn’t help the negative thoughts, not with Josh’s behavior lately. ”We can take your car,” she said, still a little tense with anxiety. She didn’t mind leaving her Cruiser in the Academy parking lot. She wouldn’t mind leaving it on top of the Chrysler building. ”I’ve gotta get something first.” She’d put the books she needed for homework in between classes, when she did plan on driving home. Nell waited a bit before actually turning to go where her car was parked though—if she turned her back, would he immediately jump in his car and drive away? Nell decided to just go get her books.

Leaning over in the back seat, she gathered the two text books she needed before crawling back out and turning to see Jane walking up, like the Grim Reaper herself. "What are the chances, Nelly, I didn't expect to see you out here. How delightful!" Jane called out, sounding genuinely please. ”What are you doing here, Jane?” she asked quite rudely. The woman seemed relaxed, looking off in the distance as she finally reached to where her niece stood. ”It seems the art of pleasantries is still eluding you, Nelly. I came to visit you, since you told me you were enjoying the Academy. And as alumnus, well, they feel as if I'm an...honored guest.” Jane waved her fingers to emphasize the word 'honored'. The younger girl just shook her head and said, ”I have to go somewhere, so unless you’ve got something important to say, don’t waste my time.” Jane laughed shortly as if finding the girl very amusing. When in actuality, the littlest things she said irked Jane to no end. Minor sarcasm turned huge thanks to the hate she already held for her. ”I don’t care where you have to go,” Jane said, and even though the woman’s voice was entirely pleasant, it chilled Nell like nothing else. ”You really overestimate my patience. I don’t have time for your little games, Nelly. You will listen to what I have to say, and if you try to walk away, I can't promise my temper will not flare. Do I make myself clear?”

”What makes you think I’ll listen to anything you say?” Nell shot back, feeling a rare sort of anger rise in her chest. Jane thought she could just speak a few choice words and the girl would bend to her will. She wanted to make it clear that she would not be sticking around to listen to anything the woman had to say. And so she braced herself for what she was about to say. ”Only my mother can order me to listen to her…but she’s not around anymore, right, Aunt Jane? I made sure of that.” It was a low blow, a very low blow, but this was her defense mechanism kicking in. And if the woman thought Tilly was a fair target in her insults, then she would use the thing that made her aunt hate her above all else in the same way she usually did. There was also the undercurrent of sarcasm, because Nell was pointing out the lie that Jane was painting of her as a cold-blooded killer. This seemed to get the goat—she really didn’t have very good patience as she grabbed Nell’s arm and slammed her against the car with unneccesary force. ”Let go of me, Jane,” she said heatedly. Instead, the grip on her arm tightened. Even though it didn’t show, Nell was terrified. This woman was a much more powerful than her in every way, and they were at the Academy. If she chose to attack her, then she could very easily do it with her element. But how far would she go? ”I don’t think I will, Nelly,” Jane said in the same cheerful voice. She was very pissed, that much was clear. ”As a matter of fact, I think I'll forgo any conversation and slit your throat open right here to save the formality of a trial.” As if to emphasize her point, ice started to form along her fingernails like fucking Wolverine, finely pointed and dangerous-looking. Not good, so not good.

Nell wasn’t counting on Josh’s interference, she was mainly focused on Jane and the fear that she may just kill her. But would the woman really do it? It’d just make her a hypocrite and land her in jail, after all. Plus, they were in a school parking lot. So she wouldn’t go too far, or at least Nell hoped. In any case, she wasn’t going to even defend herself, because there was really nothing she could do. Jane was older and stronger, both physically and elementally. She couldn’t push away, even if she tried, with the fierce grip on her arm. And ice wasn’t very friendly to plants, even if Nell felt confident enough to create a vine to trip Jane up or something. Needless to say, the girl was terrified. Why can’t I keep my mouth shut? she thought angrily to herself. She really only provoked Jane with her words, but still, the woman didn’t have reasonable or controlled responses.

She was so tuned into the fear she felt, that she blinked as she watched the ice melt away from Jane’s hand, and then Josh was there, pushing her away and clocking her in the face. Nell gasped lightly as she pressed herself against the car as if using it for safety, keeping her eyes on Jane. The woman's own eyes were fixated on Josh, who vehemently—and rhetorically—asked Jane what she thought she was doing. He was angry, Nell saw that much, which was very, very bad. She wanted to tell him to go and run, but she kenw it would be in vain. She didn’t want Josh to get hurt, and it was more than a possibility, knowing the woman. Or would she just put on an act and pretend that she wasn’t just about to attack her niece? ”Well, I think that much is very clear,” Jane said easily, as if she hadn’t just been punched in the face. Her tone took on a cold edge as she continued, “I just wished to speak with Nelly here. However, I could ask you the same thing.” Jane took a step forward, seeming very relaxed. Nell watched, braced against the car as she prayed that her aunt wouldn’t hurt her boyfriend. ”I suggest you refrain from putting your nose people’s business.” The words were evenly spaced as if she were forcing Josh to understand them. ”I take it you’ll be leaving now? I’m afraid I have no desire to concern myself with Fire kiddies who are obviously out of their league.” Jane put on one of her charming smiles, and Nell really wanted Josh to leave just so that Jane wouldn’t feel the need to go after him.

Nell found her voice then, and desperately said, ”Jane, stop. You’re making a scene.” That probably wasn’t the best argument to use against her however—Jane loved making scenes, she loved attention. Turning her gaze to Nell for a split second—and in the second, they somehow took on a colder gaze—Jane said, ”Oh, don’t worry, Nelly. I’ll be finished here straight away.” Eyes once again on Josh, the woman lifted an inquiring eyebrow. Using it as a threat, an orb of water formed in her hand. Knowing that Josh was a Fire elemental, she understood that she had the upperhand. And even if he wasn’t, she’d have likely stood a very goood chance—the Sinclairs were proud of their heritage, and even though they led their own lives in the real world, they made sure to continously hone their skills. Jane was the matriarch of that family, and Nell could feel her heart ramming against her rib cage as she considered just how much damage her aunt could do if she really wanted to.

Nell kept her eyes glued to Jane, and there was no instincts telling her to run. She wasn’t about to leave Josh with Jane, and she knew the woman wouldn’t let her off so easily. And besides, she’d still have to see Jane again. That terrified her. Next time you come across her alone… Shut. Up. Still, she knew that Jane didn’t like her at all, and as with anyone who you already hate, the littlest thing the girl even did ticked her aunt off. And she was clearly not above violence, and hopefully Josh understood that and would run away. She didn’t want to think about what Jane could do to him, because it was clear that Jane was not too keen on him at the moment. Even though her demeanor was completely relaxed and calm, Nell had seen enough of her hate and anger to understand how it manifested. ”Maybe your anger has just blinded you,” Jane responded coolly, brushing off his words even though Josh was very right. If he hadn’t come along, Nell honestly believed she’d have sustained some serious injury. And she was grateful to Josh for that, but she was more concerned about his safety now that Jane had turned her attention—and aggression—to him.

The woman was not that happy that Josh wasn’t backing down. But her smile never left her face, though it was now more of a confident smirk. And Nell felt like a doormat, glued to her car as she was. Nothing she said would make Jane leave, she knew that. In fact, Josh was provoking her almost as easily as she had. Jane wasn’t necessarily temperamental, but when something got in the way of what she wanted, that was when shit hit the fan. ”There seems to be a stalemate then!” she said, her tone rather histrionic and slightly scathing. Josh. Run. Now. Jane wasn’t attacking now—since she wasn’t very temperamental, she liked to draw things out, a cat with its toy. Her patience was even more limited with Nell, however. She didn’t even know Josh—the Earth girl wondered whether that was a good or bad thing. The next words made the woman laugh, even though they were stern and would have been intimidating had they been spoken to someone other than the psychopath that was Jane. ”I don’t think you have any authority to command me in what I do with my niece,” she said when he told her to leave. It was clear that was something far from her mind. As if completely shocked by the revelation, the woman said, ”Oh dear, I forgot to introduce myself? Jane Sinclair. I’m Nelly’s aunt, as I’ve stated. It’s a pleasure.” Nell wanted to deny any relation to the woman—she’d changed her name, after all, and not only because she wanted to get the law off her back. She didn’t want any connections with the Sinclairs or Fuentes’. But here was one connection about to assault a connection Nell would very much like to keep. Even though he’d been acting suspicious and even though he had been avoiding her—she didn’t want to lose Josh.

Jane lifted a dark eyebrow at his words, appearing amused. And she very much was, so confident in her abilities. ”Yes, I believe I can get the better of you,” she said, like she was casually entertaining an observation. Looking around, she went on, ”However, I see no one else at the moment. A shame, no?” Nell watched the orb Jane seemed to balance in her palm, realizing that she could do a lot of things with that. She was a dear in the headlights, watching what was about to happen and not being able to move to stop or avoid it. ”Pardon my French if you will, but you’re shit out of luck. As I said, I will not have you poking around where you do not belong.” With just a flick of her fingers, the orb shot out like a high-pressured hose aimed for Josh. Panicking, Nell tried frantically to reason with her aunt. ”Jane, you do this and you’ll call the attention of the Academy. Do you want that? You can’t slip away easily after injuring a student.” Her eyes were as cold as the ice she had tried to use against Nell before when she looked at the Earth girl, her fingers poised as if ready to ake another attack. But she knew that Jane didn’t want the Academy on her back, along with all the people who most likely already were. ”Yes, you would know about slipping away, wouldn’t you?” Nell bristled, half of her mind wanting to reply to Jane with a snarky comment, the other half ready to tear out of its skin as she worried about Josh’s well-being. Turning her attention back to Josh, the woman’s expression somehow more controlled when regarding him, she said, ”It is not in my wishes to greviously injure an Academy student, no matter how reckless and idiotic you are. I cannot enjoy a fight that’s already won.” Her eyes were back on Nell. ”You will come with me?” Jane phrased it as a question, but it was more of a statement. ”I am not going anywhere with you,” Nell said coldly. ”If you don’t want to fight, leave.”

Jane clucked her tongue, and shook her head. ”Just like your father, stubborn as a…what’s the word for it in your heathen language? Burro?” Nell rolled her eyes. Now she was just being immature. ”Well then, I should think I’ll be talking to you soon. Goodbye, Nelly and dear Fire boy.” Jane walked away while waggling her fingers, and Nell continued to watch until she reached her car—a rented Cadillac, of course, the poster car of the mob—to make sure she didn’t turn around and try to attack again. Nell looked at Josh, her voice breathy as she said, ”I am so sorry, Josh, she—“ The girl shook her head, running shaking fingers through her hair. She’s a psychopath, a bitch, the bane of her existence. ”Are you all right? She didn’t get you too bad did she?” Nell was already fussing over Josh, not touching him but waving her hands in the space around him as if she could magically heal him. ”I guess she realized hurting you wouldn’t get her anywhere. It’s lucky she’s not extremely temperamental or anything. She just—“ Nell stopped then, realizing something she should have been aware of sooner. Jane could get her again. It wasn’t over, for sure, and that was scary. Papa better not tell her where I live, or I swear… She shook off the thought, and looked at her boyfriend with imploring eyes. ”I…uh, I understand if you don’t want to come over anymore.” And she meant forever, because her aunt was a crazy bitch. If Josh had enough by now, then she would understand. No one should have to deal with a woman like Jane.

Nell drew back, pulling her hands away from the air around him when Josh was short with her. Why was she apologizing? Because she was related to Jane, and it was her fault that the woman had attacked him, and it was her fault she was even here in the first place. True, she didn’t tell Jane to come and she didn’t tell her to go after Josh, but it felt like she had played a big part in it. ”I’m s—“ She was certainly about to apologize for apologizing, and not only would that be annoying, it would be redundant. He went on, and she further corrected herself. ”And I’m the reason she’s even here,” Nell said, her voice carrying the bitterness she felt. ”That’s something to be apologetic for.” She guesed it’s true that you can’t escape your past no matter where you go. She should have thought the moment her father showed up, that it would get much worse from there. Nell hadn’t taken Jane in consideration. But she should have, since it was clear the woman was hell-bent on ruining her life. ”It’s all right,” she said softly. His anger wasn’t what she was the most concerned about—it was his health and the fact that Jane is getting way out of hand.

Her thoughts weren’t on how weak Josh was at that moment—of course he was more susciptable to Jane, she was a graduated Water elemental. Right now she was only wondering how true his words were, and deciding that—as usual—they were not true at all. ”If you’re really hurt…” She stopped, shaking her head. His pride wouldn’t allow him to ne hurt, she understood that. Nothing will scare him off? There should have been a bitter response, something along the lines of, “Well, that’s hard to believe when I’ve seemed to scare you off for weeks.” But she didn’t feel any bitterness. Only anxiety. And she could only imagine how Josh felt after experiencing first-hand how Jane could get. The attack was more-or-less a threat. At least she was capable of mercy. It wasn’t mercy, it was guile. Jane knew it wasn’t worth fighting Josh to get to Nell. The two would be seeing each other again, after all, she had been right about that. And Josh may not be around then. And she wouldn’t tell her father because she didn’t want him to know anything. Nell kept her mouth shut, but gave him a pointed look that spoke everything she was thinking. Then what’s up with you? ”Well, I’m glad,” she said non-commitedly. She trusted Josh, but right now she was too stressed out and worried about everything he was doing lately that she didn’t know what to think at the moment. All she knew was that she was truly scared.

Nell waited as he dried himself off, and it seemed her was still on edge. Should she ask him to go to the medical wing? No, he wouldn’t listen to her, she knew that much. In any case, he said that he still wanted to come over, which shocked her. He’d been avoiding her for weeks, and the first time he talked to her, Jane came out to attack him. That should give him more incentive to keep avoiding her. And most likely break up with her. Nell’s thoughts left Jane and her impending doom for a moment to once again wonder what she had done wrong. ”Yeah, yeah,” she said, a bit breathless. Nell didn’t really know what to say during the car ride, and it amazed her how many awkward phases they managed to go through. At her apartment, though, she peaked inside before walking in. ”Sorry if it’s a mess, I don’t know if Pablo managed to get into anything.” She tossed her bag on the half-table against the wall, scanning her apartment. Everything was in place, though she wondered if it looked disorganized thanks to all her plants, especially the spider ivy and Pothos. Nell looked at Josh before going to the kitchen. ”Do you want anything?” God knows she always had food. Plus, she didn’t know what else to say. She wasn’t going to pounce on Josh for answers.